Hi,
I just wanted to know what the forum felt about the following situation and whether there is anything legal that can be done to stop this..
Over the last few years, my son (now 9)and his friend (also 9) have been bullied at school, by a boy who has an over protective mother, my son always seemed to get caught when he retaliated and being brought up to tell the truth always admitted to hitting, poking, kicking this other child, but not knowing how to tell someone that he was retaliating. As his parents we decided to let him sort it out, but be there to support him if it got too much. About a year ago I caught this boys mum berating my son after an incident between the two boys. The teacher at the time apologized and said she bought the issue out of the class only to find the mother there and could not change the situation.. Since then there has been some animosity between us as parents, where we have told our boy to stay away from their child.. Our boy and other boys have continued to be bullied and the bully goes home and gets questioned about the day an only states what others have done to him. That is the background. Now for the bad bit. My son, his friend and a couple of other boys were caught talking about killing this child using bleach in his crisps or poison berries or a sniper rifle. I cannot condone this behavior from my child under any circumstances and my wife was rightly called into the office to chat with the headmistress. A plan of action was put in place where the boys were going to apologize to the boy in question and a workshop involving all 5 of the boys was to take place to bring the 4 silly boys and the bully together to resolve the issue. This was duly done. THE ISSUE is that the headmistress then took my child and the other child involved in the incident into an office with the bullies(victims) parents where they were questioned and made to apologize to those parents WITHOUT myself or my wife being present. When I heard this I immediately went cold with anger and talked to the headmistress the next day. She told me that it was discussed in the meeting the previous day that this would happen. None of the other parents whose children were involved and were in the meeting remembered this as we would have all refused. I can believe that this over protective Mother had instigated this and as she is a trouble maker, got her way.
Is there anything I can do after the fact to ensure that my child is not questioned by other parents without us being there... I emphasized the point to the head teacher, but need something a little firmer to ensure it doesn't happen again.
Just as a sideline...
To cap this all off, and I am no way condoning my sons behavior, the Mother called the police on Friday afternoon and said the while thing was a racial issue because they were not Caucasian or christian and this was what motivated the 'attack'. The police were understanding when they cam over and I gave a frank and honest review of our contacts with the over protective mother and they said they would go back to them and have a talk. Please understand this is not just the view of the family by myself as a parent, but also a reflection of some of the other parents views as well (I am not a gossip, just a very angry Dad trying to do the best for my son).. Roll on Monday when we go back to school.