Is anyone else wondering how they're going to juggle school and work? Or already struggling?

[SpottyTeacakes]

Dd starts in September

The parents information session is on a Tuesday morning. Dp and I both work (I work part time) and dd's settling in sessions are on four consecutive Fridays 10:45-1:05 when I also work.

From September she has to go half days, which I know will be better for her, but I can't pick her up when I'm working!

It's really stressing me out. Atm my parents look after her but it's a twenty minute drive from theirs to her school and I can't ask them to do that.

I have no idea what I'm going to do it's really stressing me out!

Just do say 2 of the settling sessions, it won't disadvantage her

My elder 2 did f/t from the off, most schools are child centred and flexible about this. For some kids its too much, for others its a breeze. DS2 will probably only go part time at first because he is my baby and I am sentimental

They are getting the funding for them f/t so there is no reason why f/t educatFor some kids its too much, for others its a breeze. Many kids will have been in f/t nursery for years already so it

I'm in Wales and they start at 3- half days until the September after they turn 4 which means nearly 2 years of half days for Feb born DS. It's an absolute nightmare and I'm lucky to be part time and have incredibly helpful parents and parents in law. When they go on holidays next year I don't know what we're going to do!

Request that she goes full time from the outset, as you are legally entitled to do, and don't worry about it.

AmI, not sure if that applies to Wales.

I'd definitely talk to the school, explain the situation, and ask if she can go full time from the start. If they have most kids already doing that then I can't see it would be a huge problem for them, and if it is, well, they'll say so!

Re the settling in days, I'd try to get her to one of them, but wouldn't worry if you can't make them all.

I completely understand how you're feeling - I felt exactly the same before mine started. Pretty soon it starts to fall into place, though - you work out what you really need to be at and what you can duck out of, you get into a routine and most of the time it works. One thing I'd definitely say is to get to know as many other parents at the school as you can - as a working parent having a support network of other people you can trade favours with, and call on in an emergency, is invaluable.

Argh how am I going to meet other parents when she has to get a bus?! Hopefully I will be able to make the parents morning and might meet someone there

If she has school transport, will that be bringing her home at lunchtime on the half days? If so, find out what time her drop off at home will be. You may find that she ends up arriving home 2ish anyway, which sounds like it would be fine for you?

Re settling in days. It's nice to go, but I really do think that it is a long time (childwise) between June and September. My DC liked going somewhere new, but none of them appeared to remember the settling in visit when they started. A few drive-bys at the end of August and some good chats with you are probably far more useful and reassuring.

I had assumed there wouldn't be a bus back but I will double check

Dp doesn't appear to want her to go full time but she is our pfb. Thinking back to the childcare I wonder if we'd get any tax credits towards it. Certainly something to look in to.

Spotty, if it helps, there is no set way for schools to handle "lead in" - some do half days for a term, some for a month, some for a week. Some do staggered starts, some don't. There's not a common practice that all schools do so your DD wouldn't be the only PFB in the world not doing it!

Sorry Spotty, I didn't mean to suggest you need to become bosom buddies with all the other parents immediately! I just meant it's worth making the effort to chat to other parents after your dd starts school whenever you get the chance. Most schools (or rather most PTAs) run various social events, you'll get chatting to other parents if you're able to attend school plays, sports day, etc. It's really worth cultivating those relationships, because it makes life so much easier if you have other people to do things like share lifts to and from parties or clubs with, or phone if you're stuck in traffic, etc.

Don't worry yourself about the settling in visits. My DS missed his they were all within the same 2 week period whilst we were on holiday and he started knowing no-one too. It was fine

I know its not particularly helpful but surely you knew how they started school / dealt with settling in when you applied to the school months ago? Why did you not work out then how much leave you'd need or budget so you could use a childminder for a couple of months?

That aside, you are entitled to parental leave for a period of time during the early years - cant remember what it is (think its 6 weeks off the top of my head). It would be unpaid but it would solve the short term problem of not being able to collect her for a six week half term.

Mandy

Most schools do not publicise their settling in arrangements. Ours can't yet tell me which of three dates will be DS2's induction day; said dates are less than 1 month away.

Employers are not obliged to give you all your parental leave in one block and they are able to reschedule it for business reasons.

Finally, unless child is already at a CM, CMs prefer not to take a short term, half day child who they will have to pick up at lunchtime and then go back to the school 2-3 hours later for after school pick up.

Thats not my experience, I visited the scools I was considering. They told me there were settling in sessions (doesnt really matter when they are, it just matters how many there are so you know how much leave you'd need) and how they managed the intake in Sept (full days / staggered start or half days). Then mafe the application, knowing if I got my 1st choice I'd need to keep back X days leave.

luckily I happened to read about settling-in days on MN so I'm prepared for those and DH and I have been saving up our holiday (plus we can both take unpaid family leave if necessary). We are also both fortunate to have flexible employers. I just need to get a childminder sorted as I don't want DD in after-school club in reception year (and there's a 2-year waiting list anyway!).

TheDoctrine- it depends. DD started her CM together with 2 other children when they all started at the same Infant school. We obviously paid the CM for the extra hours she had DD compared to a full school day. It all depends how a CM is organised.

Mandy - I agree. While we had now idea which school DD would attend and we didn't even know there are such things like induction days we knew there is something new coming and DD would need time to settle.

A friend and I actually warned all friends with DCS starting a year later about this and all working ones were grateful as school demands a lot more of parents attendance tha. The nursery our DCS attended.

Wasn't mentioned to me at open days.

Sounds like OP won't need an ongoing CM so temporary cover could be tricky.

Mandy I've only just received the letter saying about induction days. Even if I wanted to, was previously posted a few times, I don't have any annual leave to use. My parents have had three weeks holiday, my son has had an operation, my daughter has had hospital appts hours away and, ok I know this isn't a necessity, but we're getting married. It's all been booked up and I have no annual leave left. I'm not entitled to parental leave because I haven't worked there a year and I'm sure it's more for emergencies?

I didn't go and look at the school as I ended up in itu when it was arranged for and we never managed to reschedule.

I spoke to a friend who's dd goes to a school down the road and they had a parents information evening and staggered starting over three days. Yes it was naive of me to think most schools locally would do the same.

Anyway dp thinks the childminder is an option. It's a husband and wife and they live opposite the school so it's possible the will do a 1:00 pick up for me. Otherwise she will have to go full time which people on here have been really reassuring about.

Ring the school on Monday and explain your situation and ask them what you should do
Also ask about starting full time straight away

Ok there were extenuating circumstances but its a bit harsh to blame the school about how awkward it is when you never visited the school and never thought or anticipated that you might need annual leave to cover your DDs settling in and / or her starting at school. Good luck I hope it works out for you!

I am surprised that parents already know when settling in sessions are etc. I have received no such info yet?
My worry is now that I will be abroad from mid July to near end august except for two weeks middle of august!

Er, where have I blamed the school?! People round here don't seem to visit schools, you just go to your catchment one. I'm the only person I know who even arranged to visit beforehand.

Jaabaar at I expect you'll hear soon as they won't want to be doing anything too close to the end of term.

Sorry OP I can see that you didnt blame the school. Am though that anyone (not you) would even consider sending their child somewhere for 7 years without visiting it!!!!

It just doesn't seem to be the done thing round here. All the schools are so good and everyone gets into their catchment school.