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Primary education

Join our Primary Education forum to discuss starting school and helping your child get the most out of it.

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Original poster

Help bad teacher

40 replies

jellybeans001 · 04/02/2014 17:07

Hi need some help my son is 5 years old and is in reception. His teacher I'm not soo happy about he called my son stupid for kissing him and my son yesterday took his teachers ginger bread man home and ate it without me knowing it was the teachers and said to me that what he did was stealing. I feel this teacher has gone over the top abit and should not be behavouring this way. How should I deal with him

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LIZS · 04/02/2014 17:13

your ds or the teacher ? Did you witness him being called stupid ? Presumably your ds knew the biscuit wasn't his , so that is stealing isn't it ? He needs to know that is unacceptable. Suggest you arrange to speak to teacher and explain how negative comments make your ds feel .

Original poster

jellybeans001 · 04/02/2014 17:14

My child kissed the teacher and he said your being stupid for kissing me

OP posts:

usernameunknown · 04/02/2014 17:16

Did he say "you're being stupid" or more "that was a silly thing to do"? Were you there when it happened?

As for the gingerbread man, how did your son end up with it? DID he steal it?

Original poster

jellybeans001 · 04/02/2014 17:17

Yes he took the biscuit and I have spoken to him about it but I felt he should not be tallking to my son like that

OP posts:

Original poster

jellybeans001 · 04/02/2014 17:18

No my son told me about his teacher saying he was stupid for kissing him

OP posts:

IHaveSeenMyHat · 04/02/2014 17:19

He did steal the biscuit though.

What language would you have preferred the teacher to have used?

Original poster

jellybeans001 · 04/02/2014 17:20

He just seems so young to be told that what he did was stealing he just started last september

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Oakmaiden · 04/02/2014 17:20

How would you like him to speak to your son? What would you say to a child who took something belonging to someone else and ate it?

Incidentally - were you actually there on either occasion that the teacher spoke to your son, or has your son told you?

Oakmaiden · 04/02/2014 17:21

When do you think it is the right time to teach a child that taking something that is not theirs is stealing?

Original poster

jellybeans001 · 04/02/2014 17:21

Well anything but that hit a nerve with me as I didn't like that

OP posts:

DrankSangriaInThePark · 04/02/2014 17:24

What exactly did the teacher say to you?

Original poster

jellybeans001 · 04/02/2014 17:24

He told me the teacher said that to him. I have spoken to my son and have told him what he did was wrong and that he should never do that. Can see that the teacher was right as you all seem to agree with him

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pollypocket31 · 04/02/2014 17:26

He stole. End of story. Never too young to learn right from wrong in my opinion (and I'm a reception teacher).

Oakmaiden · 04/02/2014 17:29

It is hard to know if the teacher is right, as such, because we weren't there and don't know what was said exactly. Or how it was said. And with respect, neither do you.

However I would expect a teacher who was kissed by a child to be extremely discouraging to that child. They absolutely have to be - it can be a minefield for teachers, say particularly male ones.

And I would also expect a teacher to explain to a 5 year old that taking something that was not theirs is stealing

I would expect both to be done kindly, but firmly. And there is no evidence that that isn't exactly what happened.

Original poster

jellybeans001 · 04/02/2014 17:29

Drank he told me my son had taken the ginger bread man and had put.it in his bag and he then said that it was stealing. I offered to replace the biscuit and said sorry but felt that it was wrong saying a child still in the early years was stealing. Oh I don't know maybe I'm wrong then

OP posts:

Oakmaiden · 04/02/2014 17:30

"Sadly", not "say"

Original poster

jellybeans001 · 04/02/2014 17:31

Yes it's a male teacher

OP posts:

Oakmaiden · 04/02/2014 17:32

I would also be concerned about a parent who felt the finer points of property ownership didn't apply to their precious five year old

DrankSangriaInThePark · 04/02/2014 17:32

So the teacher hasn't spoken to you?

How did you find out the biscuit was the teacher's?

Your son told you?

I think you're getting (well, your son is) a bit of a hard time here, your son is only 5 and I'm sure there was no malicious intent in nabbing the teacher's biscuit, or in being affectionate with him.

That he was grumpy because of his stolen biscuit and doesn't want 5 yr olds kissing him doesn't make him a bad teacher though.

If it's bothering you, I'd go in for a chat and explain the biscuit incident, son knows it's wrong bla bla bla and see what the teacher says. It might not have gone exactly the way your son has told you. (dd is 10 and if I were to believe how she tells of her teacher telling them off you'd think the woman was lining them up and horsewhipping them, whilst shrieking and threatening violence at the same time- she isn't. Of course. )

DrankSangriaInThePark · 04/02/2014 17:33

Sorry, cross posted!

Original poster

jellybeans001 · 04/02/2014 17:35

Thanks everyone opened my eyes abit as to not take it bad. Thanks

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BiscuitMillionaire · 04/02/2014 17:35

Any post with 'bad teacher' in the title is going to get all the teachers piling in and defending their own. Good luck.

DrankSangriaInThePark · 04/02/2014 17:36

I'm a teacher.

PlasmaBall · 04/02/2014 17:36

I would absolutely expect my 5yo to be told off for stealing if he to and ate something that wasn't his. How else was teacher supposed to deal with it? What if the biscuit had belonged to another child? How would you feel if another child stole his biscuit. Of course it was stealing and needed to be dealt with as such. 5yo is plenty old enough to understand that.

As for the kissing, of coursexteacher had to pt a stop to it. You had no way of knowing what was actually said

Lollypop1983 · 04/02/2014 17:37

Absolutely agree with oak maiden.

A teacher has a moral responsibility to teach a child, not matter how young, right from wrong. Ur son did steal a biscuit, the teacher pointed out that it was wrong.

As for the kiss, it's a shame that a male teacher has to be sooooo careful. But he was right to discourage it.

I don't understand whAt u don't agree with. He didn't call ur son a thief, he said he stole a biscuit.

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