Help me find a loophole that will delay dd starting school this year

[Whatsounddoesagiraffemake]

My DD will start school in September this year which I am finding very difficult. She was born right at the end of August and was 6 weeks premature. In my head she should be starting next year and I just can't get over the fact she will be 4 and a couple of days when she first puts on her school uniform and I wave her off at the gates.

My anxiety is made worse (or is caused by) the fact that I am an Early Years and KS1 teacher, although part time these days. Teaching this year's cohort in their first week at school I could easily spot the August babies and I know that I would be able to do the same in the following two years.

I (irrationally) blame myself for her prematurity (a substantial contributory factor to my pnd) and all the anxiety from those early months seems to be creeping back, the closer the school application deadline gets.

I have spoken to her preschool about this but they tell me the she is so bright they would struggle to sustain her in a preschool environment for an another year but she does struggle with friendships and I am worried her lack of maturity will cause her problems come September.

I read about a clause in the applications process which meant that a baby born a school year early because of prematurity could be granted a delay in starting reception but when I spoke to the council they told me this only if her development had been delayed by her prematurity, which it hasn't.

I fully expect to be told to get a grip but I just can't help blaming myself for the fact she will always be the youngest in her year, will take her exams almost a year earlier than her classmates, be the last to be able to drive or drink (and the dangers that may cause!) and even start university when just 18.

Reading this back I'm beginning to see that I am being a bit foolish and wet but it's been cathartic!

I'm sorry to witter on for so long but I didn't want to drip feed. If there are any wise mnetters which can see a way out of this I would be very grateful!

I'm not sure it will be much help but I was the very youngest in my school year (born 30th Aug) and loved school from the start!

I have asked my mum and she doesn't remember any specific probs ( other than me being tired after school).

To be honest I don't think you will get anywhere with delaying her. The only thing you can do is defer her start but she would still be in her chronological year.

My DD was also nearly 6 weeks early (I blame stress for that and do feel guilty), but she has no delay at all from it.

Ok I don't have a clue about premature babies and all that, but you are legally allowed to delay her start in reception till the summer term.

It's paragraph 2.69 in the DFE guidelines for admissions

many schools don't encourage it to be common knowledge
Ours made a right song and dance when I delayed ds2 starting

But it is perfectly legal. It came in in 2011 I think. will try to find link

also they must keep her place

however if you decide not to start her till the next sept, they can offer the place to someone else. It only has to hold for one year.

sorry 2.16 (it's been re-written)

'2.16 Admission of children below compulsory school age and deferred entry to school - Admission authorities must provide for the admission of all children in the September following their fourth birthday. The authority must make it clear in their arrangements that:
a) parents can request that the date their child is admitted to school is deferred until later in the academic year or until the term in which the child reaches compulsory school age, and
b) parents can request that their child takes up the place part-time until the child reaches compulsory school age.'

From the PDF link on this page

This is a useful article that links to the Department of Education info. It talks about working with BLISS so it may be worth contacting them too.

Question 6 is about whether SEN is the only reason for delaying entry- it isn't!

I can't offer any practical help, but perhaps some reassurance. I am a late August baby, and I'm pleased about it. I feel like I've got a year advantage over so many of my friends. I know what all of the research says, but it's obviously not going to be true for every child. If your daughter is able, and her preschool aren't worried, then maybe your worries will be calmed by the time she gets to four - there's a good amount of potential to grow over the next nine months too. I'm not saying any of this to minimise your worries - but I don't think you need to blame yourself in any way at all.

I went to school at four and had a great time. My October born brother was the one who took an unscheduled nap during the afternoons during his first week at school :)

Would you be happy to delay her actual start but keep her in her chronological year group?
What I mean is, is it just the fact that she is very young at the moment to start school? Because as rooners said, you can defer her reception place until the summer term but she would then be in the same year group.

So do you want her to, when she is ready, be in the class that reflects her age? Would defering the place until the summer be a good place to start for now and see how it looks to you in the summer?

Most parents feel anxious when their pfb start school even if their child is not an august born premie. Being August born does put children at a disadvantage, but that disadvantage is not as great as people think. The difference is greater in reception and the gap closes later on when innate intelligence is more important than maturity.

Since you are concerned I suggest you make an appointment with the head teacher of the school that your child is going to attend. Many schools have a foundation stage rather than seperate nursery/ reception classes. Children are given activites that they are developmentally ready for and there is a the option of younger children attending half days. Reception is very similar to pre school and the real shock comes in year 1 with formal learning.

I think that your daughter will be fine, but very tired in reception. There are plenty of august born children and schools are better at meeting their needs.

My DD is an August baby and started at 4 and a few days too. She's been fine, the only thing that gets mentioned is her attention span not being as long as others, but it's not stopped her from keeping up with the work. She has quite a few in the class that are september babies so it was quite a contrast to be at her 5th party last year and then a 6th for a classmate the week after, but she loves school.

I'd be wary of delaying her start to the summer, especially as you don't have any actual concerns about her, as she will miss out on quite a bit of teaching in a couple of terms - the rest of the class might well be reading by then and then she actually would be at a material disadvantage.

It will suck (for them) when all their friends are driving and they are the last to learn though, agree on that. Don't think it'll be dangerous though? Might be best to be the last!

If entry is delayed the child just joins the same year group later than usual, missing out on the first part of the year. So I would send her and hope for the best.

As I read the advice, you can REQUEST to delay a child starting. It does not say the place will be kept, and that is the risk. I also think you are making sweeping assumptions about children with August birthdays which is commonly held as fact on Mumsnet. By that I mean that August birthday children are immediately identifiable and not ready for school.

I bet you would never have thought my DD was a late August birthday. Her teacher said she would have liked all her children like her. By that she meant she was enthusiastic, keen to learn, articulate, well prepared for school and able to function without her Mum for a school day. Why do you not concentrate on preparing her for school, instead of worrying about what might be the case and your preconceived ideas? I am glad my DD was not taught by a teacher who would have automatically considered she was behind her peers and treated her as a "baby". She was more able and better prepared for school than lots of the older Reception children. We, as a nation, need to get over this idea that because a child is born in August he/she will automatically be labelled as immature and incapable. You might like to know that in her group at primary school she was one of four summer born children who got an Oxbridge place. None of these children would have benefitted from being labelled as immature or not ready for school! Neither did any parent consider delaying their child attending school because the school was more than capable of teaching all the children, whatever their age. Do all you can for your daughter and do not worry. It will be a self fulfilling prophecy otherwise!

I think a younger child may benefit from the time in the (usually gentle) Reception year, as it is so very similar to pre-school. Have a think about say a January start, rather than deciding now to leave it as late as possible.

You don't need a loophole for a later start - just write to the school explaining you intend to exercise your right to defer entry and wish DC to start on date X.

Similar situation here, although without the prematurity. I am also a teacher.

I kept DD part time in her pre-school setting (small independent school early years dept - 15 free hours) until Christmas. She is starting in reception at a different school next week.

She wasn't ready in September at all. She is now. However, we took a chance on a place being available in a school we wanted when we wanted it. She could have stayed where she was for the rest of the year, longer if we could afford to pay for it!

Hi. I have twin girls born a little early in August (and have had the same feelings as you at times in thinking they should be in the year below). It was difficult at some points in their primary school careers when they seemed much younger than their cohort (reception and year 5 was tricky) but on balance I think they would have been bored if they had been the oldest in their years. Their close friends have tended to be summer born kids who are more on their wave-length but academically they have done very well and at secondary school I feel that they are definitely in the right school year. So I think there is no right answer to this.

My DS is 31st August (born 2 weeks early) and like your DD was bright but immature. He refused to speak for most of his reception year (in yr4 now and still finds it tough) and so they couldn't assess how bright he was.

It was only in yr1 that he had a fab teacher who worked on his confidence that things improved.

That said, he has a very close friendship group of 2 other boys (one since nursery and one since yr1) which is great.

It actually in hindsight would have done him no favours to stay in nursery longer especially as he wanted to be with his best friend. It has turned out that he is pretty academic and going into the year above where he should iyswim has stretched him much more easily as there are quite a few kids working at the same level as him but there would be far fewer in the year below.

Is it an option for her to start part time? You could start her f/t with the option later if she is getting too tired.

I have a summer premature born but not August DS so can't directly relate but do understand some of the anxiety for your baby.
Personally think you probably will have more of a a problem with this than your DD. It's really really hard to send your baby to school that first time especially if they are teeny BUT by delaying that start I think you will just be storing up different problems for her when she does eventually starts.
Kids this age are all finding their feet with friends, as well as the educational aspects.
We just moved house between reception & Y1 and my biggest concern was DS breaking into an established friendship group. It was the hardest part of the whole move despite him being a very sociable and outgoing boy. If we could have avoided it I would.
Although it would be easier in Sept to hold her back, You would be creating the same conditions where she would be the odd one out. Kids notice this a lot more than whether or not they are the exact same age or reading ability IYKWIM.
She will cope especially if you can understand and support her if she struggles.
On a positive note my sister is a 28th Aug born and is ridiculously brilliant at what she does academically (4A* & a 1st) and now with her career (which is extremely cool) - her main complaint about a summer birthday was everyone was on holiday for her party however she loves it now as it's sunny on her birthday whereas I get snow/sleet/rain.

I feel quite strongly that if she will have to be in that cohort (most LAs are inflexible about going up/down a year nowadays) then delaying her start will not help - she will be playing catch up. There's eight months to go and a huge amount she will develop in that time.

Our Reception class was very EYFS whereas I know some are more formal. Come to that, our Y1 is still very play/dance/outdoor based, so has been a soft introduction to KS1 for my DS(5). Do you feel the school you're looking at is too grownup within the spectrum of permitted/recommended approaches?

Is the private system an option? You might find a school with sufficiently small classes to suit her better, or one that will agree to defer her - so she would enter Reception in 2015 and Y1 in 2016 with children of the same EDD-age instead of birth age.

Once you have secured a place for your daughter to start at school in September you have the right to defer entry until later in the academic year. The school must keep the place open if you defer provided you don't delay entry for a full year.

Given your daughter's age she does not have to start school until September 2015. However, most schools and most LAs will then insist she starts in Y1 and you will have a limited choice of schools. I'm afraid there is no loophole you can exploit that would force the LA to allow your daughter to start in Reception a year late.

There is information on the Bliss website that may help you decide whether (or not) to defer www.bliss.org.uk/help-for-families/your-childs-development/starting-primary-school/.
Most of the research on premature babies suggests that the effect of prematurity on schooling increases for children born earlier than 28 weeks or birthweight under 1 kg which doesn't really apply to your child.
My dd was born at 27 weeks (not August baby) and developed enormously during the pre-school year so dcs do change significantly over 6-9 months so your dc may be ready for school in September even if she isn't now. HTH

I think you can:

1. Delay her start until she's closer to 5 (but she will join her chronological year when she does join, so you would need to do a lot to prepare her for this - as a EYFS teacher you are probably well-qualified to do so).

1. Arrange for her to attend school part-time until she is closer to 5 (if the school will support this - I know someone who has done it and felt it was a good option).

1. Educate her privately if you can afford it (and you will need to do it all the way to 18 because she would have to jump up a year to her chronological year if she swapped across to the state sector at any time).

1. Send her at 4 and prepare/support her as much as possible - including allowing her to stay home 'sick' frequently if you feel she's too tired/overwhelmed.

My 4.1 year old began school in September and I really didn't think he was ready - I took the option 4 approach but was astonished to find that he didn't get tired or overwhelmed and didn't need extra days at home. In the term he went from only knowing a few letters to being able to read simple sentences, he has made several good friends, and it has altogether been a huge success, much to my surprise. I can see now that it would have been disastrous to keep him in nursery an extra year (which I did consider - private school) - he seems so much older than the nursery children now, even the ones just a few weeks younger than him.

My DS is August and started in September - it was horrible at the beginning and I had huge anxieties about it. Nursery also said he is very bright, independent etc and he will be fine. He wasn't and still is yet to settle at school - he will settle and it is better now but it wasn't until recently I was told he didn't have to start school until the year after because by law they do not have to start until the term of their fith birthday - if I could
Turn back time I would have done that and if you are that worried I would just wait another year. Alternatively most schools do Easter intakes of younger children such as summer borns but I was advised against that as the other children would be settled and have their friendship groups.

parenthood, you can't just wait (unless you are in Scotland - i think it's different there). In England, you can wait till they are 5, but it's just the same as a later intake - they have to join their chronological class - i.e. the other children will have all had a year's school already.

She doesn't HAVE to join her chronological year group- that advice is wrong.

Guidance changed in July 2013- google "advice on the admission of summer born children" for the DfE PDF- am on my phone so can't attach.

It says there is no statutory barrier to children being admitted outside their normal year group. Paragraph 2.17 of the admission code enables a parent to request that their child is admitted outside of their normal age group. It's up to the admission authority responsible for the school to make this decision, and the guidance says it is unlawful for an admission authority to have a blanket policy which says that summer born children who start school in the September after their 5th birthday will be admitted to year 1.

When you say that you can 'spot the August born children' as a teacher I think you are projecting your anxieties and making a massive generalisation . I know plenty of August born children who've been perfectly fine going into reception at 4 and as an end of July baby myself I started school able to read a newspaper and write quite ably . If you don't want your dd to start school HE her for a couple of years and you will probably find she will go in ahead of her peers.