Help me find a loophole that will delay dd starting school this year

[Whatsounddoesagiraffemake]

My DD will start school in September this year which I am finding very difficult. She was born right at the end of August and was 6 weeks premature. In my head she should be starting next year and I just can't get over the fact she will be 4 and a couple of days when she first puts on her school uniform and I wave her off at the gates.

My anxiety is made worse (or is caused by) the fact that I am an Early Years and KS1 teacher, although part time these days. Teaching this year's cohort in their first week at school I could easily spot the August babies and I know that I would be able to do the same in the following two years.

I (irrationally) blame myself for her prematurity (a substantial contributory factor to my pnd) and all the anxiety from those early months seems to be creeping back, the closer the school application deadline gets.

I have spoken to her preschool about this but they tell me the she is so bright they would struggle to sustain her in a preschool environment for an another year but she does struggle with friendships and I am worried her lack of maturity will cause her problems come September.

I read about a clause in the applications process which meant that a baby born a school year early because of prematurity could be granted a delay in starting reception but when I spoke to the council they told me this only if her development had been delayed by her prematurity, which it hasn't.

I fully expect to be told to get a grip but I just can't help blaming myself for the fact she will always be the youngest in her year, will take her exams almost a year earlier than her classmates, be the last to be able to drive or drink (and the dangers that may cause!) and even start university when just 18.

Reading this back I'm beginning to see that I am being a bit foolish and wet but it's been cathartic!

I'm sorry to witter on for so long but I didn't want to drip feed. If there are any wise mnetters which can see a way out of this I would be very grateful!

my dh and I argued about this quite a lot

my DT boys are summer babies and have not been meeting all development targets on time

I was happy for them to start school in sept so they didn't get more behind , dh wanted them to stay at preschool longer

in the end they started with their year group but the school gave them a slow buildup in the first half a term

after one term they have settled in well and have come along more than I could have hoped for. one is decidedly average and one needs support due to being immature but the school are dealing with it beautifully, its a small local school and are very supportive

I think we made the right decision, but go with your gut feeling and do think long term

AhoyMcCoy - There has never been a statutory barrier to admitting children outside their normal year group. It has always been the case that an admission authority must consider the circumstances of each case and that a blanket policy such as you describe is unacceptable. It is nonetheless acceptable and legal for an admission authority to refuse to allow a child to start in Reception in the September following their 5th birthday unless there is evidence of delayed development. The LA in the OP's case is entirely within its rights to say that the OP's daughter cannot go into Reception a year late unless her development has been delayed due to her prematurity.

Pressed Post too early!

So in this case the OP's daughter does have to join her chronological year group. That is the LA's decision as admission authority and, having considered the circumstances of this case, they will not allow the OP's daughter to join a different year group.

OP - I think you'll find that deferring you daughter's start is the best way to go. She is august born and noting anybody does will change that. Just give her a few more months before starting school and then very likely she will be totally fine. All mine started in January. One was nearly 5 and the others were 4/75. I find the idea of just 4yr olds starting very odd.

AS PRH says in reality it is the LA who can decide whether to allow entry into a different year group and whilst the rules were changed in 2013, in reality at present it is more theory than practice. LAs can see the practical difficulties of this and are resisting doing anything by saying that it can only happen when her development has been delayed due to her pre-maturity. That is obviously not the situation in this case.

If you really believe that your daughter is not ready for school (and I wonder how much is your anxiety) then what you should do is accept the place offered. You then contact the school and say that you wish to defer entry till later in the year, that is say January 2015. But as a school teacher you should know how many friendship groups are made during those early months in school and would ask you to think about your daughter's future not your anxiety over her maturity.

Thank you so much everyone for your replies, sorry for not checking in earlier, it's been one of those days. I am so grateful for all the advice; the practical, the personal experience and the wake up calls. All have given me the kick up the ar*e I needed to realise that I need to shelve my own anxiety and see my dd for the confident, bright individual she is and appreciate that the staff at the school will do their utmost to support her. It's an odd thing to not appreciate that others will do the same as I would as a teacher. Just goes to show how caught up in my own anxieties I've been.

DH and I have decided that we will send her this September and that we will do everything we can to ensure that she is prepared and supported. However the knowledge that we can accept the place and defer if necessary is a good safety net (but given the majority of advice, not one we will likely take). The future is something we will deal with when the time comes.

Once again, thank you mumsnet for the perfect combination of advice, wisdom and grips. I now feel confident in our decision.

I expect your confidence will rub off on her. Self-fulfilling prophecy, perhaps?

Good luck to your DD!

As a teacher (also with a summer baby) I think you are right to just go for it and send her in September. I think
It would be harder for your DD to fit in with the rest of the class. I teach y1 and there are two boys in my class who joined in the summer term of YR and some of the others took weeks (in my class in the autumn term) to even learn their names-they were v much on the periphery of everything (eg the others would say, 'him, that new boy') which I found quite sad.

I worried too. My August baby is more immature than some of his friends.

But he loves school so much all my worries seem so far away now.

I think the youngest ones will always stand out. But there will always be a youngest age group no matter what the cut off is.

Is she doesn't like it you can pull her out until yr 1 starts. Or home ed until you feel better.

There are always options, but how do you know what she can do if you don't let her try?

Depending on how strongly you feel about it, there is a loophole. You could move to Scotland where she wouldn't start school until the following year.

Probably not very helpful advice though :)

lots of good advice and options.
As you will know, Reception is still very play based and the focus is on social aspects and relationships. They don't expect children to come equipped to make friends or ready to do formal learning from the start, recpetion is where they learn HOW to make friends etc. Sorry, I know you probably know this as a teacher but I know it feels different when it is your own child.
Yes she will be the youngest most likely, but all children develop at different rates and she may (Sept is a long time) be far more ready than other children. I have found my class of children all tend to do better and worse in different things and it is not age related always. Different children are expected by staff to be tired or take a bit longer to learn things at first. Some will not have been to pre-school so are disadvantaged in that way just as your DD is by age.
I'd really advise keeping her in the right year group and letting her go at 4. Reception is very adaptable and flexible in most schools, it is the year for letting all the children go at their own pace. If needs be, she can do part time for a while. As the pre school said, there is little more she will get out of the pre school environment from staying there, suggesting they believe she is ready and able to cope with the change.

I randomly was searching for something else by a particular campaigner by the name of Pauline Hull and noticed she has since become involved with this subject.

summerbornchildren.org/

I remembered seeing the title of this thread a couple of days ago, so thought I would post here. Pauline is very thorough and good at spotting problems with research/policy and raising awareness of the issues surrounding a subject so I'm sure she will be successful at this campaign in the end.

I haven't got very far reading it, as its not something that really is of much concern to me, but it seems she's on the case with this and has spotted a few things that might help you.

She states that:
The Department for Education says it’s unlawful for admissions authorities to have a blanket policy of Year 1 admission for all summer-born children that start school age 5, yet this is exactly what many summer-born parents are faced with.

Another one of the posts on her blog, states that there are a number of counties that are definitely being flexible in their approach (though the circumstances of this she hasn't confirmed and whether these incidences have been one offs or a general flexible policy).

Hope this might prove to be of some use to someone out there. Have fun reading.

if you are on Facebook search for the group Flexible Admissions for Summer borns - they have lots of really good info