AIBU to not hear DD read every night?

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Sorry for the title, I couldn't think of a better way to put it!

DD is 4 and a half, just finished first term in Reception. She is enjoying school, after a slightly rocky start concentration wise which I have put down to her taking a while to settle in to the new routine, longer week and so on.

She has a school diary in which the teacher records group and independent reading she has done at school and I do when we read together at home. Occasionally the TAs who run the after school club also hear her read, or one of the older children who are called 'reading buddies' do, and they write in her book.

I don't formally heather read at home Monday-Thursday (not Fridays,which is my day off) although we do read together at bedtime, and enjoy books together. This is because she goes to Breakfast club at 8am, and after school club after school till 5.30 becuase i am at work. We get home just before 6pm And have just over an hour together before bed. She is cranky and tired by this point, and isn't at her best. We also have to make and eat supper, get washed and ready for bed and asleep by a decent hour.

This week her teacher has written in DD's reading journal that she needs to practice more at home.

Do you agree? Should I keep her up later to hear her read, what other options could I have?

They ask you to hear your child read for ten minutes a day, because this is daily 1:1 practice with an adult (if a school tried to provide this, at 30 children x 10 mins that would be 5 hours a day just hearing children read one after the other - no school has the budget for that!).

Children who read at home with an adult 5x a week or more, progress faster and more confidently through the levels. By the time they get to Year 2, usually in the lower reading group, with the odd exception, every child does NOT read at home. The top group tends to be the reverse. You do get the odd anomaly with very bright children who pick it up for themselves (and some children will struggle however much practice they get), but that is the trend.

It is very difficult if you work full time. Could you ask after school club if they could read with her before/after school on two days, then you read with her on Saturday and Sunday? Depending on their child:adult ratio, they might have time to do this.

Reading is so important for children's confidence in their academic abilities and for accessing the other curriculum subjects. I choose to prioritise this for my younger children so we make time for it even if it's last thing before bed.

It's a bit like music or gymnastics or football - the more you practise the better you get - and 5 or 10 minutes is completely appropriate at this age. So don't view it as some task that you're being hassled to do by yoir child's teacher but rather as a choice: do you want your child's reading to get a boost or are you not really bothered?

Bronya, there is no way anyone would expect to hear all children read for 10 mins each! However, teachers find other ways and means of getting the children to read. That is why they're teachers! Paired work, whole class reading, signs, instructions, menus are a few of the ways this happens!

Also, reading isn't just about 'getting throughout the levels'. The majority of the year 2 reading SATS are based on comprehension.

Are you reading to her every night? If you are, then I wouldn't worry. If you aren't, then build a story into her bed time routine. A proper story, and with you reading to her, I think bed time stories should be sacrosanct, no "school reading" smuggled in by stealth!

Another thing we are trying is making dinner as "instant" as possible. So pre-prepared pasta salad, sandwiches made up the night before (DS has school lunch) so that the supper part can be done as quickly as possible.

The first half of term I got ds to read about once a week, usually the days I didn't work. We would get home from after-school club at 6.30, and he would collapse on the sofa. I would wake him by 7.30 at the latest, to leave the house at 8. I was putting him to bed before 7 and toddler dd after!

I wrote a fair bit of "too tired to read" in his diary, but what I did do was still read him stories before going to sleep, asking him to read the odd word, and putting Alphablocks on telly for him - it covers the first stages of phonics blending.

Second half of term has been better - he's been happy to read 2-3 times a week and sometimes been up a bit late as he wanted to read both books and I wanted to encourage him, with no ill effects.

He's the oldest in the year too. As long as they are getting exposed to reading at this point, I'm sure sufficient sleep so they can benefit from the school day is more important.

To be frank I feel a bit sorry for a 4 year old who goes to breakfast club and after school club- I'm not surprised she is cranky. Not something I would want for my young kids- but each to their own.

What's the alternative? Give them a key and let them fend for themselves?

Yanbu,my parents never sat down and made me read ever and I was and am a good reader..
She is 4 and it is better to not make her read when she is tired and cranky as it will just make reading less enjoyable and potentially put her off doing it at all.

What's the alternative? Give them a key and let them fend for themselves?

Obvioulsy not.

Find a way of making money that means you can be at home for kids coming home from school. It's not rocket science.

Easy, peasy, can't understand why everybody isn't doing it!

Depends on your priorities- for me being at home to pick up my children at 3.30 from school was hugely important.
Working out making money has to fit around that.
Where there is a will there is a way.

Really hoping 2014 sees the dawn of a new cliche to replace the oh-so-tired-of-it "it's not rocket science".
We totally felt that reading with our DS every day was something we could make our own decision on, rather than doing what the school asked us to do - but now that he's in Year 6, we rather wish we'd listened to the school and done what they asked. He's slightly hesitant when he reads and makes loads of daft mistakes in basic punctuation and sentence structure; the close attention required when children read aloud (compared to being able to just skim over the page because they're reading alone) apparently brings with it a better observation of these structures and conventions, and thus relates directly to stronger writing skills in the later years.
It's also easier to pick up on words that they don't know - DS now has a relatively weak vocabulary as well, because we just didn't take that opportunity to listen to him and ask him if he knew what certain words meant.
Of course, I can't say for certain that he wouldn't be inattentive and lazy about his writing skills even if we had listened to him read aloud every day, but at least we wouldn't be wondering if he is paying the price for our being a bit ramshackle about it (sorry, not the best grammar). I should also say that he's in a school that sets next to no homework, so I think that's also had its effect on his writing skills.
The only thing I can't quite remember is if I'd have started very young, or if I'd have left it till maybe Year 2 or 3 before getting too stuck into the reading aloud every day thing. At some point , though, if I could do it again - I'd make the time, somehow. I do know it's difficult xx

Hi msmiggins

What is your job? Maybe we could all do it.

Yes, I am looking for something where I can knock off at 3 pm and still make a decent living.

Can you listen to her in the morning? I used to do that with my youngest, it worked well for us. She used to read to me in the car on the way to school, some will say that was awful but at home we preferred to share other books.

Yes what I do anyone could.
I sell second hand stuff on ebay and Amazon. I have been doing this for 12 years - I also write copy for a contebt farm- £12 an hour. I earn £18K a year. I also write copy for a content farm.
No qualifications needed- and very little start up.

That would be fine for an older child who can read, but with a child this age when they are reading to you, I would have thought you would have to make sure they are getting it right, otherwise what is the point?

I don't read every day with ds2. I try to read , as often as possible.
AND I agree with the poster, who said don't smuggle in a stealth school homework book, into the fun bedtime story.
I may not read school book every day. But EVERY night we have Captain Underpants, read before a kiss goodnight. So much fun. Why replace that with stressful phonics, teaching, hard work.
Don't do it!

I honestly admire you, MsMiggins, for your initiative. (There is no symbol for "I'm truly not being sarcastic, I mean it"). But I think you underestimate the extent to which some people lack the confidence to start their own thing. Not all advantages in life are financial.

Actually, sorry, this thread is getting derailed. My apologies.

Thankyou Mrs steptoe,I'm not having a go at people honestly- it's just that money can be made in other ways.
I spend my saturdays going to jumble sales, buying other peoples unwanted stuff,anything from a wet suit to vintage handbags, old cameras etc.
I sell 3000 items a year.
It requires no brains.

Thus is getting derailed. Mrs mugging must spent a lot of time sourcing stuff for eBay ( she may take her children with her to these car bout sales etc) and selling, and packing and answering stupid eBay questions!!
That's her choice. Some people work full time because they have to. I chose to work part time.
This is s irrelevant.

Please let's get back to the topic. Reading.

I thought the topic was about finding time for reading- I am simply demonstraing a way in which a mother can make more of that time.

Would it really be so hard to squeeze in 5-10 minutes most days Monday-Thurs? Even just phonics practice. I would be unhappy to not do that much.

I would probably think that if the teacher has felt the need to mention it then they presumably feel your child is not making the progress they were hoping for. I have noticed out of my daughters' friends the ones whose parents don't listen to them read (even if they do read TO them) are much less confident and struggle more.

I do personally think it is important to practice the sounds they are doing in school every day as otherwise they forget things. If you can't do it through reading is there some way you could maybe put the sounds up on post its around the home so as you go to clean teeth you can say 'what is this sound?' and getting things out of the cupboard 'what is this sound?' That is how I remember learning foreign language vocab so you would practice it just as part of day to day life without it taking any longer or requiring particular dedicated time.