I'm angry with the school that my son can't read

[Teamumizumi]

my DS is 5 and has just finished reception. Reading has always been a struggle and he has "progressed" to level 1. I've been trying to get him to read appropriate level reading books over the summer and have now given up. He can only read basic words like "and" " to" "for" "at"..... I'mwondering what the school has been doing for 2 years -he started in their kindergarten so he has been "reading" for 2years. What he does is get the teacher/us to say the word out loud, then he memorises it. Now that he has read a couple of books cold i have discovered he cannot read at all. WHAT DO I DO???????

I've been trying to get him to read appropriate level reading books over the summer and have now given up.

..and now you've decided to just blame the teachers?!

Now that he has read a couple of books cold i have discovered he cannot read at all.

What? You've only just discovered this? He's 5

As a teacher, we can tell those parents that read to their children every night before bed, and make reading part of everyday life (e.g reading cereal boxes, as someone has already mentioned). Education is a partnership. Do you read? Does he see you read? Why have you not been into school before now to discuss your child's progress?

YABU. But it doesn't surprise me, sadly.

Isn't level 1b the average for the end of year 1? Do you feel he's at level 1c, or getting there?

If you feel the school are misleading you, then that's infuriating. I would set an early date to make an appointment with his year 1 teacher and make it clear what you want from him/her.

Any chance you can volunteer to read with the children in year 1?

for the summer, i would look to enjoy books with him as much as possible. It sounds as if he is finding ways to feel confident with books (e.g. memorising text? those books with CDs as well?) I don't think that's terrible at this stage.

Give the OP a break folks, she sounds stressed and worried.

I felt very stressed when all the other children were reading confidently and my DS was still memorising books rather than reading them.

OP, is your son confident in phonics? If not then it might be worth looking at Jolly Phonics or at the Read Write Inc stuff.

FWIW I read to my son virtually from birth, even if the initial books were just the cloth shape books. He loved being read to and still does - did not get him reading any quicker though because he had an underlying problem - and maybe the OP's DS does too.

For my DS Read Write Inc has been a Godsend - he is 9.5 and a fairly confident reader now. Two years ago though he was barely managing anything.

He's priobably just not ready yet.If he's not developmentally ready then no amount of teaching no matter how good is going to get anywhere.It's like trying to teach trigonometry to the cat!

She's been trying to get him to read over the summer and has now given up?
So we are what 2-3 weeks into the holidays and that's it, she's given up? but of course it's the schools fault

It's your fault for not teaching him yourself, not the schools. Buy some books and read to him.

Yes, YABU. Schools are not miracle workers. There may be a number of reasons why your son can't read yet: e.g. he hasn't practised enough (that's your job - to help in the evenings/at weekends); he may have poor eyesight and/or hearing which has yet to be diagnosed (my DS' appalling eyesight went unnoticed by everyone, including me, until he was 6 - kids are good at hiding it!!); he may be dyslexic or have a speech/language disorder (speak to the SENCO at school if you think these may be a possibility); he may just not be ready to read yet; he may have an issue with tracking, in which case you can google "behavioural optometrist" and get him tested .....

Practically speaking, this is what I would do. Stop blaming the school - it won't help your son. Get the first week of next term out of the way (to give his new teacher a chance to see how well/badly your son is reading). Then make an appointment to see the teacher. Discuss your concerns without being accusatory. Devise a plan of action, in conjunction with the teacher. Ask for a meeting with the SENCO if you still have concerns.

Now for the plain-speaking bit. Between my DCs I have experience of 4 primary schools and they ALL made it very clear at the start of Reception that parents area expected to read with their children at home in order to help them progress. You should have been checking your son's reading diary weekly AT LEAST, preferably daily - the fact that he cannot read after a year should not come as a shock or a surprise to you. However, it isn't necessarily cause for concern at this stage as per the reasons I've given above.

As it is AIBU - then yes - YABU based on what you have posted...go back in September and let them know you are worried. Ask what you can do to help your DS and ask if they have any other concerns.

maybe the OP should give the school a break.

But the child is only 5.
My dd couldn't read when she was in reception. And hers is a selective school.
She is 9 now and very good at English. The school did very little at reception in terms of straight reading or maths. Reception was all about listening skills and all that stuff. Lots of dressing up if I remember rightly.

Op, you sound stressed and your son will pick up on that. Do some looking at books together, reading together - and talk with the school about your concerns as soon as term starts.

OK. Look maybe I was harsh.

It sounds like he is being 'cute' and learning words by rote, like when they first bring words home eg, cat, mat, rat. If they are always shown in that order they don't necessarily see the word, they just remember it.

First of all, don't panic ! Reading comes easy to some, not to others. Make it fun, and no pressure. It will come eventually.

As others have suggested, you can 'read' all the time, food, shops, sign posts, there's loads. I used to make little 'word cards' and write certain words and then put them all over the house, it becomes almost like a subliminal learning.

Don't feel angry with him, it may just be taking him longer...you can also buy word packs to help with reading, go easy on one another and start off just with 2 and 3 letter words, and progress as you need to.

HTH

I can't believe the flaming the OP has received on this thread. I'ld say the OP could choose one of 2 constructive approaches over summer:-

1)go all out with phonic songs/flashcards etc, try and practice blending.

or 2)stop trying to consciously teach him if it's getting too frustrating, read to him loads and encourage him to read the odd interesting word on menus/in shops etc.

Then at the beginning of year1, speak to the teacher, explain your concerns ask what both teacher and she can do to help him along with his reading.

YABU, he's 5, pressure to read will only make it something he doesn't want to do.

Also, as the others are saying, don't just blame the teachers, why is it that you've only just realised this? Surely you would have been reading with him at home since school started too?

What do you mean by "level 1". Do you mean stage 1 of the Oxford reading tree or national curriculum levels.

I suggest you take a look at this site www.starfall.com

Its free and your son could learn his phonics and there are stories for him to practice with. I also suggest getting hold of the jolly phonics teachers hand book. Practice blending with him and make sure he knows all 42 sounds inside out and back to front.

I suggest getting hold of some phonic readers. They will help build his confidence and give your son a sense of sucess. I used these with my son.

www.jellyandbean.co.uk/

I think its quite reasonable to expect a child to be able read a little bit after spending one year in reception. If your son is still completely clueless about reading then the school should be doing something to support him before his confidence is knocked to pieces. You have every to be angry if you son can not read "at" or "for" or "and" as they are very simple words and a five year old should know how to blend if they have forgotten them.

Yes the OP does need to give the school a break.

what did his end of year report say?

I think level one is great for a 5 year old, my daughter did not receive a 1 grade end of reception and has now progressed to expected level 1a in her end of year 1 report.

Every child is different and some take longer to pick it up than others.

Maybe you could take your son to the library and let him choose books he enjoys, it could be that he does not enjoy the school books.

I read chapter books each night to my girls which helps them a lot ( reading with expression & gives you the chance to talk about what happens next etc)

The child hasn't been at school for two years. In nursery they don't teach them to read.

I don't believe it is an issue, seeing as he's only 5. It'ss easy to get caught up in thinking that if your child isn't reading Harry Potter (because it's always Harry Potter by end of reception year, then all hope is lost.
I do however think the Op's attitude is well off.

Has the school sent home the letters for you to practice with him? We have been expected to do one or two ORT books at home with them every week and keep a reading journal. It doesn't sound like much of a home / school partnership. There are lots of things others have suggested that you can do to help and don't worry 5 is young and he will catch up with a bit of back up.

It's unclear from what the OP has posted whether the school have overestimated his ability by not cottoning on to him memorising words instead of reading them, it may or may not be reasonable for her to be angry. TBH even if last year's teacher did cock up a bit, it's best to hope that a fresh year brings a better teacher with better strategies than to go in all guns blazing over it.

The OP has not come back......perhaps the responses have been too scary. Well it IS the AIBU topic.

I've asked for this thread to be moved to 'primary' where you will get better support from very experienced people.

I would just say though, that my dd was on stage 1 at the end of reception too. It is very stressful indeed (i remember it well) but what others on here told me is true. There will come a point when it just starts to click. If he isn't there yet, you can't force it. However, you can instill a love of books and stories, which is so important to their life long reading

Don't think of this as a sprint but as a marathon. It doesn't matter how quickly or slowly he works at it, as long as he gets there in the end. By the time he is sixteen, it won't matter a jot if he was free reading by year 1,2 or even 3...trust me

I don't think the responses have been too scary.

From what I understand it's all about when their neural pathways form. So for some this is at age 4 for others age 7 or even later. Until it clicks it's a bit of an uphill struggle.

If I were in your position, I'd be going through the phonics with him. If he won't sit down and do it with books, find a computer based one or one of these children's computers. Alphablocks is one on the cbeebies website I think. But there are lots. Something like this one:

www.bbc.co.uk/bitesize/ks1/literacy/phonics

Most of all, don't worry. For some it just comes easily, for others it's harder and takes a bit more work. Just keep reading to him as much as you can.