Star of the week :(

[ramblinrose]

Ok, this may seem petty, but I just want to get it off my chest.

DS3 is 7 (yr 3). One child in each class gets to be star of the week. I would imagine it is for good behaviour, trying hard, being helpful etc.
There are 27 children in his class. They are at school for 40 weeks of the year.

Now, DS hasn't had star of the week at all this year.
His recent report says that is behaviour is very good, as is his effort, progress etc.
He is meeting his targets, and on the whole, in my opinion has had a pretty good yr3.

He is not one to really bother that much about these things, and, normally I don't either. Things would have to be a lot more serious than this for me to go into school all guns blazing.

I suppose it's just niggling me a bit.
Does anyone think that children of middle ability who don't misbehave can sometimes slip under the radar?

DSs school changed their policy a year or two ago. Now they pull names out a hat. A letter is sent home on Monday telling you your child has been selected and you and your child have to conjure up a reason why. Apparently it is good for the child to think about themselves. I wish they'd talk it through at school with said child as not sure how I have any idea what good things they have done recently at school .

TheOne That's very interesting (and also worrying)
I think that's what is bothering me. I can't help feeling that the teacher has sort of forgotten about him

Same with my ds. There are only 21 children in his class and despite being a relatively high achiever and well behaved he has only had star of the week once. I think everyone just has a turn and it is used to reward those children who need encouragement. He doesn't seem bothered. What was harder to explain was when we were told not too worry about reading with him everyday, but we did anyway. He then found out another child was being rewarded with notebooks etc for reading to his mum everyday. He finds that harder.

I loathe star of the week. DS rarely gets it despite being well behaved. DD gets it regularly. Perfect situation to produce a squabbling cross pair of siblings. I think DD gets it because she is so loud and always in the middle of things and hard to overlook. While poor DS is overlooked a huge amount and is horribly jealous of his younger sisters constant stream of certificates, stickers and star awards. They are ridiculous, she got one last month for " really enjoying herself", it's crazy.

ramblinrose I'm not sure I have any practical advice but if I had my time with ds1 again I would be on to school about everything and make myself a pain even if it meant they only paid attention to him to stop me being a PITA.

This may not be the best plan but it's what I'd do in hindsight. I don't need to with dd or ds2 as they are both very good at putting themselves forward

I don't know why I labour under the illusion that teachers will be fair and recognise that the middle of the road quiet children don't get recognised. It has always been the noisy gobby in yer face kids at my DDs school who got all the recognition (and the best parts in all the plays grrr).

Lol! Yes indeed, Bear. I think it should be renamed 'Naughty/gobby kid who managed to actually be good/less gobby for a day of the week.'

DS has got to the end of the year without getting Star of the Week. And I know this as I checked all the school letters (had filed them all in a big pile) and every single one of his classmates has had it, a couple of them twice.

He has been a little bit naughty, but there are certainly worse behaved children. His report was excellent and he's a confident little thing, which makes me wonder if they are concentrating on the children who need a boost in their confidence and overlooking him. In the end I went out and bought him a fab new Lego kit for such a good report and moving up another book band last week.

But woe betide his new teacher if he doesn't get something next year if he carries on doing well.

My son was star of the week for a whole term.

The star of the week's name goes on the year's web page alongside the other classes stars. My son took part in some child development research at our local university and took his certificate of participation into school which is why he was made star of the week. However, I suspect his teacher then lost the password to change it over to someone else. So he stayed as star of the week until the next parent's evening, when I suspect someone mentioned it to her.

As far as I can make out, it's given to all the children in strict rotation; it's not actually in recognition of anything in particular? Maybe your child's name just isn't on the list?
Some reception parents react as if their child had won the Nobel prize; it's always vaguely amusing to watch the antics in the playground when their child emerges clutching one - posing for photos, load ostentatious phone calls to the proud daddy; then in Year 1 they realise they'll be getting it again just as soon as their name pops up on the list, nothing more.

YANBU

DD2 is friends with a lovely middle achieving, very nice girl.

Her Mum and I had exactly this conversation and decided that her Mum jolly well should moan, as daughter was beginning to notice. She did and surprise surprise her DD was star of the week shortly after.

Honestly you would think the teachers would keep a list, but between star of the week and good worker awards we do see the same faces rather a lot.

Much as she likes being praised, DD2 has reached the point where, even she feels the teacher ought to be more imaginative than giving her another certificate for good writing. She knows that many of her friends have put in just as much effort, she simply had old style English teachers for Grandparents.
They may have died before for she met them, but their genes have definitely been passed on.

I certainly think some of the quieter children and some of the boys deserve a turn.

Well, I spoke to DS's teacher today and she didn't realise he'd been overlooked and not had a Star of the week certificate, she said they should all get one in reception year. I should have mentioned it a couple of weeks ago shouldn't I . So unless they can pull something out of the bag by tomorrow he won't get anything. Ever so slightly pissed off about this now.

Aww. Poor your ds. Hope his teacher manages something!

I hate star of the week and this is why . . .

The children are supposed to think that anyone can get it if they try hard but in reality no matter how hard they try, day after day, week in week out, they are only likely to get it twice a year if they're lucky.

It is supposed to be a reward for a really good week but some children just cannot manage good behaviour for a whole week so, in the interests of fairness, those children end up getting the star of the week when they haven't actually had a good week.

A week is too long to wait for a reward. If any child has done anything worthy of appreciation, it should be fairly instant, not three or four days away.

And finally, everyone is supposed to get it anyway, so what's the point?

And I'm the one in our class who has to chose the star each week which is a miserable responsibility because there are so many little stars and I feel so mean seeing the disappointment on their hopeful little faces.

Oh and fwiw my dd was a quiet, well behaved, overlooked child and rarely got picked for anything at primary school but now she is inundated with merits, awards, fab school reports and great gcse grades. These children do come into their own eventually

Fairenuff, I agree.

Seems such a divisive practice and one so ripe for the law of unintended consequences I am surprised any school would consider doing this.

The DCs had 'All About Me' day when they gave a short presentation about themselves and all the children got to interview the centre of attention, ask polite questions, learn more about each child. One child did it each week, and it went alphabetically so no-one was disappointed not to be picked. It was a special day for every one of them. The aim was to see something positive in each child and find things in common with each other, like similar pets, liking the same sort of cake, etc.

YANBU OP.

The reason "star of the week" is used, is to make each child feel special and valued. The fact he hasn't received it yet, will genuinely be a mistake! Enquire to the teacher as to what can be done to receive it etc. This will make sure the teacher doesn't get offended, but realises the child hasn't received it!

I personally wouldn't give "star of the week" to a specific child. I give out "table of the week" to the group tables. This is awarded at the end of the week to the table that has been the most helpful. The tables are awarded points which is written on the wall, so they can actively see who is being most helpful, and who needs to pull their weight a bit more.

Children are not singled out, as this can demoralise aswel as praise. If I were to reward individuals, all children would receive a reward completely different to one another, so as there could be no discrimination.

Very different to most of the replies here at ds's school.

Headteacher's Award (class award really) never given to the naughty children or not usually to the bright and hardworking children, but mostly to the 'kind and thoughtful' or the 'average and hardworking' children. You should all move your 'quiet and under the radar' children to our school!

Ds has had it just 3 times in 7 years at school (clever, hardworking, well-behaved but weak social skills - he has AS)

Well, DS finished reception year without a single class certificate .

I will make sure that in September he will hand in the summer project to end all summer projects and he will get a class certificate even if it kills us. .

My DCs' school allotted chores to everyone on a weekly basis. Each child got an individual thank you from the teacher in the weekly report that was sent home in the home folder, and there was a big class round of applause on Fridays for jobs well done by all. Then the next week's chores were given out.

DD4 got a commiseration from one teacher when the class goldfish kicked the bucket on her week

I hate Star of the week. That is all!

I hate it too - Star of the Week is done a Friday - so ds in tears at pick up because he didn't get it at all this year, or 100% attendance because he was unlucky to have ONE day off ill (illness is a lottery and I'd rather a child who was sick wasn't sent in to spread it round..) hate hate hate it - there must have been one thing he did this year of note??? no supprise is it that the Ed Psyc said in May he had low self esteme