Those that are successful at doing extra work with your dc during term time or the holidays how do you fit it in,when and how do you make it not become a battle?

[Rockpool]

Don't want lectures on letting kids be kids thanks.I have my reasons.

I know what to do but have always struggled to find the best time to do it during term time(and the holidays)so we haven't done a lot bar school homework. I also don't want to battle over it so how do you engage your dc positively without it ending in a major stressfest?

TIA

mnistooaddictive - DS does not need to work on maths, he is ahead in that, however his handwriting (and therefore his written work of all kinds) is awful. I'd be quite happy if DS did no formal maths work at all, all summer, but he wants to do it, he enjoys it, and that means I can use that enthusiasm to get some writing done.

I think, if I can fix his writing issues, then his general literacy level will end up about the same as his maths. I'd be over the moon with that. But I'll be very happy if, by the end of the holidays he is writing legibly, voluntarily, and using far more of the language he is capable of.

Thanks.

Mn it's dd's maths(big confidence problem) and 1 twin is a leftie so writing needs work.

DSD needs some work on her math, but is happy for now working through some Carol Vordermann workbooks and earning the gold star stickers per page completed. So long as DH and I don't lose our patience with her when she needs help remembering 8+2, that is. DSD's grandmother has just written sums on a sheet of paper for her to complete, with pennies to use as backup - no rewards, just "this is what we're doing today" and I think approaching it as though DSD would of course think it was pleasant, and not boring. That was done during the afternoon, I think after lunch. DH has also quizzed DSD on adding money and then rewarded her with said money (about 75p) when she's worked out the sums.

We're thinking of trying mental math sums for pennies next, and seeing how much pocket money she could win. If that falls flat, we might try out flash cards with a chance to win pennies per sum and see if having the numbers in front of her makes it easier. If that is still a struggle, we might go back to using counters until we're sure it's in place. Her teachers can take it from there.

DH and I both work full time. If we are doing any support-type work, it's for maybe 15 mins on an otherwise lazy weekend. We might try to fit something in on our vacation in a few days time, but we're definitely playing it by ear. We're suggesting, but not making her do, the math books etc at this point. DSD needs some help with schoolwork, but she's an enthusiastic student, so we don't want to kill that.

Sorry for my derail in to a phonics debate! I actually don't feel strongly that I need DS2 to be learning any phonics, but he picks up from DS1 that it's 'cool' to start knowing this kind of stuff, and is keen to do rhyming and first letter games - so just thought it might be a subject area where can find him something to keep him occupied while DS1 gets a bit of work done.

If I go the ignore route with DS2, he tends to sort himself out with a fun game or maybe DVD that DS1 then wants to be involved in - hence me wanting a 'quiet sit down' kind of thing for him to do. Will try to make it drawing, but he's not reliably interested for long enough yet, and doesn't have skills to do intricate stuff.

Yes, when my DS was about 3 he couldn't be ignored either, he was very needy and wanted constant attention. On the other hand, DD is easy - she just goes off and amuses herself for ages. On occasion I have found the bathroom flooded with her sitting in the middle playing tea party with real water.

Interesting thread, and yes, I do do stuff with my lot, always have done, it's part of our daily routine.

DD1 - going to high school in September, a bit behind in maths (although has made huge progress (for her) this year) - will reinforce the areas she struggles with when the wind is blowing in the right direction and she hasn't got PMT; very resistant to help generally but quite receptive to a few sessions of ; literacy, no probs, a talented writer, loves it, all good.

DD2 - the smart one; generally great at everything, way above expected levels for everything, loves learning, no concerns. But, if I had to pick a weaker area I would say it was maths, and in particular applying maths knowledge to problem/word solving, so will listen to reading/read to her and do a 15 mins a day on the above, but she will be much more receptive than DD1.

DD3 - entering reception in September, can read, more than she lets on most of the time, good maths skills, can tell the time , very astute; can see her coming home in the first weeks of reception with books that are too easy - her words not mine - and being a handful. Will learn the phonic sounds as school prescribe and then we will see; in the holidays will keep up with reading chest, the library reading challenge, bitesize, nina and the neurons etc.

I work with mine in the holidays and agree re routine. With my youngest, now 4 I would often keep him busy with number cards from 1-10, asking him to put them in order at the table while I worked with the others. Now I give him little sums with pennies. Its nice reading this thread as normally, including on mumsnet, I think I'm the only parent that doesn't think I am destroying childhood with daily work in the holidays.

I buy revision workbooks - the best ones I can find. And, yes, she has to do them after breakfast!

Breakfast - 15 minutes a day. End of. No bribery. No games - if people can make it fun then great but at this age getting the basics in if often just a case of endless practice.

I am totally disorganised in every way, but dds are very clever ( I think ds is too, but he is too young to tell and he can't see, bless him). I think some of their ability is inherited ( I have been told they are both exceptionally able) but I do just squeeze learning in wherever I can.

When we are walking around we are observing thing and we always read books every night. If we don't do do anything else, I find that enough at the age the dcs are now.