Rude Headteacher

[sandything]

I am absolutely fuming. I'd asked my kid's HT if she could countersign their passport photos a week ago. She'd agreed, but this morning still hadn't done it and the holiday is drawing closer. So this morning, she again said she would have it ready by tomorrow. So I said, are you sure, because otherwise I can ask someone else, because I am running out of time. She said yes, I said thank you. I was in no way rude, I am very unconfrontational. 15 minutes later I get a call from her secretary, telling me that the HT thought I was very rude and I can collect the unsigned passport forms and get someone else to do it! I was flabbergasted, because I am just one of those people who go through life rarely having rows, I'm very laid back. There have never been any issues at the school, my eldest is in y5.
I think she is like this with a lot of parents, the whole feel of the school has changed since she became head 2 years ago.Teachers are dropping like flies. I have never complained. Now I really feel like writing a strongly worded letter, drawing some attention to her interpersonal skills and how she will need them to survive. I was never one to complain, but now I will be writing letters when I'm not happy and I will not be giving supportive feedback to the ofsted inspectors.
I am a 41 year old woman, I do not expected to be treated like a naughty schoolgirl, especially when I have done nothing wrong. Should I write the letter?

The person you are calling a secretary is probably the school "burser".

But yes, good ones can make schools run smoothly by ironing out these sorts of problems. If you have a good school secretary, don't forget to thank her.

I'm forever signing these forms - but privately for friends, not children at school. In fact, I expect that I wouldn't be allowed/advised to by the Head. Hadn't thought about the point about having to include your own passport details. Not sure why but wouldn't want to give those to a pupil.

And yes, they take flippin' ages to do properly, and check, and then you feel responsible if there's an error of some piffling kind and it's sent back and delayed and so forth...

Agree that the school secretary in this case perhaps ought to consider a course in tact and diplomacy.

I've been inundated over the years with these. They are (possibly) the bane of my life. But, they aren't that hard work (providing you have your passport number on hand, that is an annoyance - locating, remembering to bring it etc) but,I think she shouldn't have accepted if she couldn't do it and that if she was to do it it was easily done within a week.

I wouldn't write a letter, other than to say you are sorry that you upset her. Being apologetic is an incredible way of making your point. Ie - you = polite. Her = over-reacting cow.
I've found people who I've apologised to in the past tend to become like pussycats in further meetings.

It's not part of her job description, so you can hardly complain about the lack of pastoral care, or report her to the governors.

If you and she are not meeting eye to eye, that is just a clash of personalities, and not a reflection on her ability to run a job. I'm surprised she agreed in the first place. I can just imagine the MN threads appearing about heads spending their school time signing passports rather than running the school...

Clam you are very generous checking the form as well and I am sure this does extend the time it takes. My DH signs a numbers of these forms too but he just writes on the back of the photograph to confirm it is a photo of the correct person and completes section 10. It doesn't take him long.

As for the passport number it says on the instructions that the person countersigning the photographs should have all the information so they can seal the application when they have signed it. I am not sure whether I would want the responsibility of the cheque etc though, but it would mean they wouldn't see your passport number.

Why would your head possibly not allow you to sign these forms if the government list your profession as one that can sign it. As although the list of people able to sign seems exhaustive some people might not know anyone that would qualify other than the doctor and as has been pointed out would be charged plus IMO possibly wouldn't know the child and be able to ID the person despite being on their list for 2 years.

OP hope you now have your form signed? Have a lovely holiday.

The Head might not want teachers to sign application forms because

1. it's not actually their job
2. they would have to do it in their "spare" time
3. some teachers are affected disproportionally-I'm the only teacher in my school who has been there long enough to legally verify identity so "have" to do them all ( including parents applying, ones for elder siblings, babies, the lot!) Personally I don't mind, and do try to get the forms back the following day, but in large schools the number of potential applicants could be huge-and they all want them this month!

Could it have been the secretary stirring? Maybe the head teacher did say something to the secretary but never expected it to be passed on!

What a rude, petty reaction from the head teacher. She should have signed the forms and been done with it. I would be concerned that such a childish, petty woman was in charge of my children's school. For those saying that signing the forms is a pain and time consuming and not the heads job - you are right but she had agreed to do them.

Well our teachers won't countersign in the first place - maybe this is why!

Getting the other woman (whatever her job title!) to ring you after the fact was petty and stupid though.

exactly Merry - you don't expect an expression of exasperation that you make to a colleague to be passed on verbatim.

I think it's most likely that, lingle. No-one ambitious and intelligent enough to make Headteacher would risk angering a parent and starting playground gossip over something so silly.

Actually the secretary in question is a darling and the way she worded it, did suggest that she was told to tell me I was rude. It's very much HT's style.
She had promised at the start of the week that she would have it done by Tuesday and not done so, so I think I had no option but to tell her it was getting urgent. And if she didn't have time, she shouldn't have told me that "of course she signs them" last week. I did see HT in the playground yesterday and told her I wasn't impressed. I think I'll leave it at that for now. I think she's scored a huge own goal. And I managed to see a teacher friend yesterday and sent the forms off this morning. Roll on summer holidays!

Good god. YABU to have even asked (do you have ANY IDEA how much work is involved in running a school?!) and the ht is being unreasonable for saying she'd do it in the first place! She should have said no, then the op could have merrily found someone else.

Personally as a teacher myself I'd only sign forms for people I actually know on a personal level.

I apologise for my terrible wording!

The problem is that HT committed herself not once but twice. OP therefore had the right to say its getting urgent! HT should have just said she couldnt do it as she is busy.

I still cant understand why after OP said it was urgent, HT then said "yes" that it will be done, and then sent her secretary to say OP was rude! Why didnt she just tell OP to her face ?

Sounds remarkably like the behaviour of our former HT before she "resigned". Red flags definitely here - ours failed to submit CRB applications, ensure adequate pupil records kept, failed to submit forms ensuring lunchtime staff were paid then lied stating they had been submitted, atmosphere poor at school, accusing parents of being rude etc. Falling out with the governors, making everyone feel unwelcome marked the end of the line.

If the HT agreed to sign the forms she should have done so - she is a HT fgs and quite capable of stating she was too busy to undertake further admin work. She has kept you hanging on and it is unprofessional behaviour on her part and she has now lost your support as a reasonable parent at the school.

ElsieMc - erm I think that your first paragraph is reading quite a lot into the failure of this HT to do something that is not in her job description and which many schools have a standard policy of not doing at all????

I know a lot of HTs. Many are heading home for the weekend later with several hundred reports to read and add a personal comment to.

You know, this HT might have got something wrong on this occasion. Will the education of the pupils suffer as a consequence?

As for lots of teachers leaving - well that can go either way to be honest. Sure, sometimes staff leave because they don't like a new HT. Sometimes it's because the new HT makes it clear that actually their teaching needs to be improved. Sometimes it's because the new HT boosts the confidence of the staff and they feel more able to apply for a promoted post elsewhere. Sometimes it's just because staff feel that it's the right time to move on.

Sigh.