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Original poster

Really silly question for mums of kids in private schools

65 replies

Newindiemum · 09/02/2012 15:40

I had to name change as I can't bear for anyone to realise how so silly I am. I expect to be bashed a lot but please I really need advise/ reassurance.

My dc are starting at a private school in September, due to work, dh and I won't be able to do the school runs, a relative would be picking them up and bringing them home on the bus.

As we have no experience on private schooled kids, I assume most kids Would be picked in fancy cars and all. I'm just wondering if my kids would feel inferior for having to walk all the way t the bus stop to take the bus, or if the other kids would make fun of them. One of my dc's is quite self conscious and we're working on that. The other is more confident and wouldn't bother one bit.

I'm just after some reassurance that my kids won't be the only ones walking to the bus stop after school!

Thanks.

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LIZS · 09/02/2012 15:44

dc's was in the middle of nowhere so everyone used a school bus/car to get there. If it is in a town then you will probably find a few others using public buses or walking.

Pagwaatch · 09/02/2012 16:00

Hahahaha

No. Kids get to school by train, bus, coach and walking. Yes, the occasional fancy car but no one gives a toss.

Don't start out wondering if they will feel inferior. If the teachers, the parents and the children have seemed sensible when you visited then they will probably not care.
I don't care. Dd doesn't care. At ds1s school it was deeply uncool to be flash.

Azure · 09/02/2012 16:10

I second what Pagwaatch says. Plenty of children go to & from school on the bus, most walk / scoot, some are in clapped-out cars and really not very many in fancy cars.

startail · 09/02/2012 16:19

Lot of the DC here use the train and the private schools have their own buses. Lousy public bus service round here.

azazello · 09/02/2012 16:24

I use the bus every day with DD, so do quite a few other children going to the same school. It is a bit of pain because DD doesn't like the walk, but that is her, not because any of her friends have commented in any way.

We're at primary so there are more people travelling by car or walking but there isn't a car park, let alone one full of Rolls / Jags. I

would be surprised if it would be an issue.

sillymillyb · 09/02/2012 16:33

I used to get the bus when I was at private school, there was loads of us and def no stigma.

My nephews currently attend a much posher school than I did and there is a huge mix of cars there. I drive an 06 reg punto and don't feel at all out of place. Oh, and once they are older the kids take pride in getting the bus as it means they have more freedom.

Don't worry!!

woolleybear · 09/02/2012 16:33

About 50/50 between cars and walking at dd's school I'd say. There's a few posh cars but my old ford doesn't look out of place either. The parking at school is awful, I wish we didn't have to drive there!

vixsatis · 09/02/2012 16:41

Son at v posh school. We use the bus and fancy cars are few and far between. No-one will care.

ExitPursuedByaBear · 09/02/2012 16:46

The other children will throw stale buns at them as they drive past in their posh cars, laughing and pointing and braying "Oh look at poor Johnny and Mary".

Of course no one will bother. My DD is at private school and you cannot move for all the school buses and coaches at drop off and pick up. One way to encourage more children to go is to lay on bus servcies from surrounding areas.

PepeLePew · 09/02/2012 16:47

Children walk, cycle, scoot, come by bus or come in the car. My car is deeply uncool, but I have never felt that anyone in a smarter car was judging us. And frankly I wouldn't really give a toss if they did. One parent drives a car that is held together by string (literally - one of the doors fell off and they tied it back together) and my son thinks it's the best thing ever. I've never heard anyone pass comment.

I used to get the bus into the West End via Chelsea - lots of parents would get on south of the river with their children who were going to the very smart prep schools in Chelsea and Knightsbridge, and they never looked too traumatised. Made a lot of sense for parents to take them in on the way to work.

PurpleWithaBlueBun · 09/02/2012 16:56

No don't worry! Mix of bangers and okish cars, the kids have to be picked up at school which is a chore as it is only a 15 min walk and I think it fosters independence to walk to school especially at secondary! So check that you don't have to take them too and from :)

There was the episode of 'Jack Wills knickers' where all the other girls wear JW knickers and how awful she doesn't have any, £15 a pop! Honestly, no problems at all and she wasn't teased about knickers just felt a bit left out.

PurpleWithaBlueBun · 09/02/2012 16:57

Oh and we walk!

Abitwobblynow · 09/02/2012 17:11

Nobody will bat an eyelid. At our smart school there were aston martins next to the muddy L reg farm truck in the car park. Nobody took any notice. Its who you are (friendly, open geniune) that counts.

Frikadellen · 09/02/2012 17:15

sounding very sexist here but in the private school dd2 and ds went too the only posh cars was when daddy picked up.. In the state school they now go to the only posh cars are when daddy picks up.... no difference

LaurieFairyCake · 09/02/2012 17:18

I work in a very posh private school and there's a massive tendency to have grotty, cheap cars, very old landrovers/4 by 4's - round here everyone spends what money they have on a house (rented or mortgaged).

Original poster
Newindiemum · 09/02/2012 18:31

Thanks all, I'm relieved... And feel a bit silly for even letting it bother me!!! I can change back to my usual name now!!!Grin

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Original poster
Newindiemum · 09/02/2012 18:33

Maybe it's just as well, cos my car isn't posh in the slightest sense. It's ok but most times the inside is filled with crisp, biscuit crumbs, empty juice boxes etc! And I really agree with frikadellen... Dh drives a really posh (and clean) car!!!

Thanks everyone!

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Hulababy · 09/02/2012 18:34

Huge mix of cars at DD's school from big shiny 4x4 things to old runarounds.

Maybetimeforachange · 09/02/2012 18:34

People dont walk to DD school as it is in the middle of nowhere but there is the full range of cars from brand new top of the range to old bangers with most people driving something inbetween. I was just thinking today that many of the cars are far less fancy than the ones at her state school. Friends with children in more centrally located private schools walk, bus or scoot.

2littlecherubs · 09/02/2012 18:46

My 2 at private school and there is a real mix. Some people walk, some bus it, some have lovely cars and some have clapped out cars. Nobody really cares so I really wouldn't worry.

sugartongue · 09/02/2012 20:01

Once the school fees are paid there's no money left for fancy cars!! But in all honesty even though there are rather a lot of v swanky cars at school (think Bentley) there are also plenty of old bangers and people who walk or cycle. Never felt out of place with my rust bucket. In fact, I think there's a kind of inverted pretension among the posh parents (as opposed to the rich ones) towards running as old and mucky a defender as you can!

sugartongue · 09/02/2012 20:02

Ooh, wasn't suggesting by that that I'm posh (quite the reverse...)

suebfg · 09/02/2012 20:03

No, there's all sorts - posh cars, old bangers, plenty travelling in on the bus or walking.

arghmyear · 09/02/2012 20:12

Kids at our private school go by:

foot
bike
bus
taxi
posh car
shit car

and anything in between.

Original poster
Newindiemum · 09/02/2012 23:47

You all cannot believe the relief I feel!

I decided not to name change yet cos I might still have a few more 'silly' questions!

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