play dates, do you reciprocate?

[fufflebum]

DC1 had an invite for tea last week, came home and was very down beat about it. I am not tempted to reciprocate as my DC does not seem bothered and has not mentioned it since.

I am aware however that said childs mum is miffed as she invites and expects reciprocation. Personally if my Dc asked for this child to come home to play I would be happy for them too but DC is not bothered so I think that it is ok not too.

Just wondered what others opinions are on this.

Thank you, ragged. And a to you, too! It would be lovely if everyone's children were so confident and had so many friends to choose from, they didn't notice when they never got invited back to other children's houses, wouldn't it?

well, we don't always invitations back. We have one set of friends that we all get on with, and the kids are in and out of each other's houses in a really easy way (because the mum is a proper friend of mine) TBH tho, I am a bit mentally drained by wondering what is wrong with me/ my children that we don't get many invitations. To be fair, we sometimes have done - there is a group tho that ds is part of where the parents are so close that they don't, i think, need or want any other child's company. I have offered (another) playdate which was not really welcomed, and I am going to withdraw it, and just give up. I am a bit sick of being the mug trying to extend ds' social group always at my own expense/ inconvenience. On the other hand, there are definitely lovely parents who do reciprocate and in those cases i absolutey don't care if we don't turn take exactly and I do two in a row iyswim?

Ragged- that is so tricky. My 9yr old understands now and is fine with lack of invite back.

6I think it knocks my 6 yr olds confidence so I have just stopped inviting friends over for her. I then worry that I am not enabling her to make friendships.

My 3 year old starts school in August and I am determined this time not to invite. I am always the first to invite and only a few are ever reciprocated.