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Primary education

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Original poster

Help me - I'm going to explode

141 replies

soandsosmummy · 18/10/2011 15:33

Another mum has just sent me a link to DD's teacher's facebook page saying she thinks I should have a look.

They've written:

"so irritating having a left hander in my class this year. She's so slow to finish anything and her writing is atrocious - teacher friends got any ideas what I can do?

she told me at parents evening DD is only left hander in her class this year so its obvious who she means

DD is in year 1, quite bright with reading, sums, imagination etc. but just struggles with her hand writing. I've talked to her about constructive ways forward and thought things were going alright

i'm going to explode

OP posts:
academyblues · 18/10/2011 16:55

Actually, I don't think exploding is that unreasonable reaction.

No, she didn't name your dd but you and your friend both knew who she meant.

If she finds left-handedness irritating, heaven help any kids with SEN in her class.

In your situation, I would print the page off, ask for a quiet word and show it to her without saying anything. Just let her squirm.

I would then ask her for her action plan to help your dd's 'atrocious handwriting' and if there is anything you can do to support her at home.

Depending on her response, I may also go the head.

This is bang, bang out of order on many levels and I can't believe how off hand some posters are being about it.

dikkertjedap · 18/10/2011 16:55

I do understand why you feel upset, but the positive thing is it seems her teacher actually is asking for help to deal with LH-ness. Is she a new teacher? I would expect that most teachers have plenty of experience with LH-ness, and yes, it might make teaching to write slightly more complicated but it is not the end of the world. BTW there are many LH teachers! I would not make a big thing of it, but I would mention that her facebook page has been brought to your attention and that you find it uncomfortable that other parents can read things about your dd as it is very well possible that they also know that your dd is the only LH child in the class.

FlossieFromCrapstonVillas · 18/10/2011 17:02

You have to give people the chance to explain themselves first.

JaneBirkin · 18/10/2011 17:05

Of course others will know who she means...the OP's friend did.

I'd be showing the page to the HT too

SuePurblybiltFromBitsofCorpses · 18/10/2011 17:07

With respect Flossie, I don't think she does. You could just as easily say that she has to go straight to the HT because she shouldn't try to 'discipline' the teacher herself.

Am aware that 'discipline' is not quite what I mean. I mean that you'd have it out with another mother, someone in a professional position should perhaps be addressed officially as it'll have official repercussions.

Bucharest · 18/10/2011 17:12

Whether or not the teacher meant well and was genuinely looking for ways to help this "irritating" Hmm problem, don't most schools have cast iron disciplinary systems in place that as a teacher you simply do not do what she has just done? (ie talk about your students on facebook? Even anonymously)

I am usually to be found 99.9% of the times on the teachers' sides in threads like this. But if this were me, tomorrow morning I'd be there with my screenshot with bells on.

FlossieFromCrapstonVillas · 18/10/2011 17:14

Yes, I see your point SuePurbly. I'd be interested to hear what the OP actually does.

SuePurblybiltFromBitsofCorpses · 18/10/2011 17:16

What Bucharest said. I'd be fuming.

YY Flossie, I'd be rubbernecking interested too.

GalloweesG · 18/10/2011 17:16

Why are teachers so obsessed with handwriting. It's nearly obsolete.

cjbartlett · 18/10/2011 17:17

I find it baffling that teachers befriend parents on fb
at preschool there was a sign up saying don't bother sending friendship requests to staff as there aren't allowed to accept them

ScareyFairenuff · 18/10/2011 17:19

In my school there are very strict rules regarding FB. This would be a breach. It's apalling that a teacher would be 'irritated' because a child is left handed and absolutely ridiculous to feel a need to moan about it on FB. I do not believe she was just seeking advice at all. Totally unprofessional and out of order. Take the print out to the head teacher. This reflects badly on the school and who knows what other comments have been made.

Best to nip it in the bud. If you go to the teacher, the head will never know about it, the teacher will adjust her settings and carry on complaining about the children she is paid to teach!

QuickLookBusy · 18/10/2011 17:22

The teacher should know better.

You cannot ignore it as she needs to be told how unprofessional she is being. Hopefully she won't write about her pupils on a public forum again. Imagine if all teachers did this?

Go to the HT in the morning.

DownbytheRiverside · 18/10/2011 17:22

'Well if nothing else, the teacher needs a shot across the bows to warn her of the dangers of FB if you're a professional. She's MAD not to have the highest privacy settings, and even more so to mention school or pupils even obliquely. I never make any reference to school on mine whatsoever. People have lost their jobs for this sort of thing.'

What clam said. I'd be cross about the mentioning of my child in any form on FB by a teacher, and there are far better ways of phrasing a request for help.

Fifis25StottieCakes · 18/10/2011 17:23

I would just go in and say i dont think its appropriate to discuss your pupils on a social networking site and leave it at that.

HauntyMython · 18/10/2011 17:23

A status like "I have a pupil who is struggling due to left-handedness - can anyone advise?" would be fine, IMO.

One using the words 'irritating' and 'atrocious' is not though - it may not be personally slagging off the DD but it's still rude.

I agree with the screen print of FB thing, if nothing else it'll remind her not to be so naive about putting things on FB. My (public-sector) job is nowhere near as important as teaching but I still don't put anything about it, or customers, on FB.

Jenski · 18/10/2011 17:25

Some headteachers are very anti-facebook and would be horrified to learn of something like this.

It is unprofessional and pretty stupid of the teacher to:
a. Befriend a parent (if that is the case)
b. Not have the highest privacy setting on an FB account.
c. Discuss a child on FB (even if nameless)
I would be really upset by this, but I would approach the teacher first. If you feel she is not bothered etc... then tell her you are going to inform the head.

lovingthecoast · 18/10/2011 17:36

I'd be livid and as a parent and a teacher I would expect this teacher to be disciplined. Totally and utterly unprofessional. Not only should she not be posting such a thing on an open forum but the 'irritating' comment is completely unacceptable.

If she is finding a bright left-hander irritating then heaven knows what she thinks of the poor child struggling to grasp anything academic. Helping a left-handed child with their handwriting is a challenge but I always feel so much sympathy for the child because it can all seem so incredibly frustrating for them especially in Y1 when everything schools based such as exercise books is geared towards the right-handed child.

If she is finding such a fundamental part of her job as an infant teacher 'irritating' then I suggest she looks at something less challenging. I would definitely go in and see the HT and state that you find her comments both unprofessional and hurtful.

lovingthecoast · 18/10/2011 17:38

And to describe the work of an identifiable child in her class as 'atrocious' is quite simply, unacceptable.

Groovee · 18/10/2011 17:46

I'd take a screen shot and get an appointment with the teacher as she's an eejit for not having her privacy high. In our LA that is a discplinary issue which one member of staff didn't name the child but it was obvious who she was talking about and she was put on the first stage of the procedure because of it.

JordanBaker · 18/10/2011 17:56

I would be Angry And the fact that she is asking her teacher mates for ideas does not make it OK. Definitely take a screen shot. I'd be tempted to go straight to the HT but it depends how you think that would impact on your relationship with the teacher for the rest of the year.

MigratingCoconuts · 18/10/2011 17:57

I'm another one who thinks this is very stupid and unprofessional.

FB is the work of the devil!!!

As a teacher I am not a member of facebook and in my school there are definate recommendations and guidance about internet use.

This teacher has made a very basic error in not realising her 'private' call for help is actually in the public domain.

Sleepglorioussleep · 18/10/2011 18:43

She should never be using the word irritating with respect to a pupil especially on a public site like Facebook-clearly is too public if parents are reading it. I would be tempted to have a word with her if you feel brave enough otherwise take it to the head. Or take the view that you will see how it all progresses and how the experience is for dd. She has behaved unprofessionally.

handsomeharry · 18/10/2011 18:48

I really don't think I would be able to leave it. At the very least the teacher should be made aware that her privacy settings are too low.

She also needs to refresh her memory about confidentiality. If she wants to have a professional discussion then surely she should realize that Facebook is not exactly the best place for it?

Northernlurker · 18/10/2011 18:48

If one of my dd's teachers wrote this on bloody facebook I would take it straight to the head and request it be addressed with the member of staff. It's totally inappropriate. The information given is enough to identify your child.
If she needs professional counsel she should be asking her colleagues or using an anonymous site in an appropriate manner.
I am v easy-going about school issues but this would have me seeing red without question.

Feenie · 18/10/2011 18:52

It's nothing to do with her privacy settings - if she accepts parents as friends, then it doesn't matter how high her settings are, they can see everything.

It's to do with having parents as friends, having a friend who also happens to be a total bitch and being stupid enough to moan about a child on Facebook.

Have changed my mind - the 'friend' and the teacher actually deserve each other.