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Help me - I'm going to explode

141 replies

soandsosmummy · 18/10/2011 15:33

Another mum has just sent me a link to DD's teacher's facebook page saying she thinks I should have a look.

They've written:

"so irritating having a left hander in my class this year. She's so slow to finish anything and her writing is atrocious - teacher friends got any ideas what I can do?

she told me at parents evening DD is only left hander in her class this year so its obvious who she means

DD is in year 1, quite bright with reading, sums, imagination etc. but just struggles with her hand writing. I've talked to her about constructive ways forward and thought things were going alright

i'm going to explode

OP posts:
ScareyFairenuff · 18/10/2011 22:57

The head teacher needs to be made aware that this has happened. They should issue staff with guidelines for using all social networking sites and perhaps provide some refresher training re confidentiality.

The other issue, the fact that a teacher is irritated by a left handed child is ridiculous. It's such a minor inconvenience to the child compared to other difficulties they may have, and there are lots of strategies which can be used to help. A quick google could probably answer that one for her, or a chat with more experienced staff in the privacy of the staffroom. The post on fb was a very unprofessional moan and cannot be excused.

If you speak to the head teacher and, as a consequence, your child does not have a good relationship with her teacher, then that just shows further unprofessionalism and incompetence. You and your dd should not have to settle for that.

skybluepearl · 18/10/2011 23:56

it shouldn't have been said on FB really but it does sound a mixture of negative and positive. Irritating situation but how can i help child? Any advice? Shows teacher had been thinking about how to help your DD. Thats how i read it anyway.

sqweegiebeckenheim · 19/10/2011 00:08

WAVES AT THE SILLY TEACHER [hgrin]

As a teacher, I have to say it's a huge no-no in teaching. The HT should by rights be informed, if only to know they have an eejit on their staff. And as a left hander who won many's the handwriting competition run by the nuns I'm insulted. We are not slow! We are fabulous, left-brainy, creative types :) :). Being young and newly qualified is no excuse at all. PGCEs do cover things like this - well mine did anyway, and that was several years ago.

I read this in the Irish Times today and thought NOBODY IS THAT THICK to post about kids in their class, surely. I was wrong!

Fifis25StottieCakes · 19/10/2011 00:12

My grandmas a leftie and so was her brother
One of my db's is
One of my dd's is

Does it run in families

Chandon · 19/10/2011 07:36

I think you are overreacting.

Don't go to the head. if it bothers you, go to the teacher.

You might have to explain why you were checking out her FB page though.

JordanBaker · 19/10/2011 08:34

She wasn't checking out her FB page. Someone else saw it and sent her the link.

CustardCake · 19/10/2011 09:39

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

midoriway · 19/10/2011 09:50

I can't believe the apologists for the teacher on this thread. This is a huge breach of professional standards, by someone who obviously does not yet fully understand the implications of shooting her mouth when she is a visible professional.

As an ex-teacher I would be horrified if a colleague in the school wrote something like this. It needs to go to the head immediately. She needs a quick lesson in expectations of professional behaviour. She isn't in college any more and needs to understand that.

JaneBirkin · 19/10/2011 09:57

I agree you speak to the HT

this isn't even about your child, it's about the teacher's misconduct and needs to be addressed, rather the HT needs to be made aware of it, so they know what sort of attitude the teacher has - one day she may well do it again WITH ANOTHER CHILD and the school will be in deep shit and she COULD lose her job.

You are doing her no favours in hiding this. You're doing no one any favours. A word from the HT could put an end to this immediately.

cheeseycharlie · 19/10/2011 10:00

I also think she is asking her friends to help her to find ways to help your child. Her fb settings should be more private obviously and perhaps you should say so to her, but in terms of the content of her post I think you should actually take heart that she cares enough about getting it right for your child to worry about it in her free time and ask her friends for help.

I totally understand your gut emotional reaction, but if you take a step back and look at it objectively it's actually a positive thing.

In your position I would take her to one side and say to her that she should manage her fb privacy settings more carefully (unless you want to retain an insight into what she thinks!! Which would be very sneaky and immoral, obvs) just to let her know you know. She will feel a bit embarrassed I expect which might make you feel better, but no need to fall out with her over it. You could use it as a springboard for a grown up discussion about how to help your DD.

CustardCake · 19/10/2011 10:44

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

celticlassie · 19/10/2011 10:54

To be fair - I think it depends on your school. It's not necessarily a 'gross breach of proper conduct and trust and confidentiality' - it's a bit of a mistake. I imagine any HTs with any sense would merely tell her not to be so stupid again and to fix her Facebook settings, rather than taking serious disciplinary action.

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 19/10/2011 11:10

How can it not be a breach of trust and confidentiality to discuss a child a) in such a negative manner and b) in a way that makes the child immediately identifiable to a third party?

Mumtobe79 - this is a totally different situation to the one you describe. Of course teachers have a right to a private life, and to do whatever they want in that private life (providing it is legal). But this teacher was not posting pictures of what she'd done at the weekend, or discussing what she'd got up to at a party - she was discussing a pupil, in a rather negative tone. Teaching that child is part of her professional life, not her private life. Had she posted "Does anyone have any strategies to help improve the handwriting of lefthanded children", that would have been very different, and far more acceptable.

BreeVanDerTramp · 19/10/2011 11:15

I find that appaling and totally unprofessional.

To those who think it is acceptable if she was a nurse who had written 'have a patient with a fear of needles, it is so irritating. Do any other nurses have any advise on how to treat it?'

Sorry OP for comparing your daughters left handness to a fear of needles, it was all I could come up with Smile

CustardCake · 19/10/2011 11:27

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BreeVanDerTramp · 19/10/2011 11:33

Exactly, I really think it is awful that someone in a postition of trust would write something like that. The teacher could find herself in hot water I don't imagine that the head teacher will see it as using a resource for advice!

JordanBaker · 19/10/2011 12:26

Wonder how the teacher would feel if a parent wrote on their FB page 'So irritating to have an inexperienced teacher this year. She's so slow to answer any queries and her lesson plans are appalling - Mum friends, got any ideas what I can do?'
Even though the teacher would be identifiable, perhaps she would just think 'oh how marvellous, parent is asking round fellow Mums for advice on how to help me improve' Hmm

HauntyMython · 19/10/2011 12:28

Ha, good point! Respecting privacy works both ways.

Feenie · 19/10/2011 12:29

celticlassie - it doesn't depend on the school. The General Teaching Council banned a teacher from teaching for two years only last month because of a teacher's misuse of Facebook, and that wasn't even connected with teaching.

Feenie · 19/10/2011 12:30

I think all teachers on this thread are appalled at this teacher, JordanBaker.

Ormirian · 19/10/2011 12:36

She's asking for advice. For your DD's sake as well as her own.

FB is a bloody nightmare anyway - everyone seems to use it to have rows Confused Stay away from it and then you won't get upset

stickylittlefingers · 19/10/2011 12:40

I agree, she probably feels like she's talking amongst friends and hasn't chosen her words wisely. I would have a word with her (especially given you've liked her thus far). She will probably be quite upset and up her privacy settings at the very least - but TBH I would expect such comments not to be written, anywhere, ever. I expect anything not completely normal is "irritating" to a teacher, but obviously they've got to expect it.

BTW my DD2 is a leftie. I suspect that her teacher's FB page would be more likely to say "she is so irritating because she never bloody shuts up and always thinks she's right. Any ideas how to tell her to can it?".

CustardCake · 19/10/2011 12:57

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

JanePumpkin · 19/10/2011 13:00

But Orm...as well as asking for advice, she was having a big old moan about the fact this child is in her class, AND she is breaking confidentiality about the child's progress/ability, by saying she is slow.

That's wrong in anyone's book surely.

OP I'm really sorry you're upset by it...perhaps we ought to start another thread, anyone - to discuss teachers' use of facebook?

I don't feel comfortable continuing here when OP has asked us to stop.

Sleepglorioussleep · 19/10/2011 13:04

It's definitely about the way she wrote it which changes it from being a fair question about how to improve her teaching to being an opinion about a personal characteristic of a child. That is what makes it offensive in my mind, although Facebook would not really be the place for it even if sensibly worded. This is now something which could be a disciplinary issue.

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