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Primary education

Join our Primary Education forum to discuss starting school and helping your child get the most out of it.

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Original poster

Star of the week...nonsense!

61 replies

bubbles1112 · 08/10/2011 22:41

My dd, is in year 2 and the teacher chooses a "star of the week" each week. Said star then has the class mascott for a week and sits on a special chair in class for the week.
I get it! It's either name from a hat or pick the kids that need most encouragement. However dd doesn't. She breaks her heart and really questions why it isn't her. She is always well behaved and is very bright, but still tries her hardest all the time and I feel so sad for her, bless her.
I really do not want to explain this to the teacher because I'll look like an arse! So how can I help her not feel so bothered?
I wish the school wouldn't bother with this system!

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Runoutofideas · 09/10/2011 11:28

DD's Yr2 teacher runs a similar scheme but for their class it seems to work really well. They have "star of the day" every day which can be for anything from a good piece of work, to being a good friend, trying hard to sit still or the best one I've seen yet "trying hard to be less bossy"! This means all children get one each half term. Star of the week is for children who have built up the most stars during the week for all of the above - so is likely o recognise children who are generally well behaved and pleasant. In dd's class they all seem to find it motivating as far as I can tell.

babycham42 · 09/10/2011 11:34

My kids were happy to be picked but it didn't impact them at all while they 'were waiting their turn'.

This little girl is genuinely affected by it.What is the harm in her getting an earlier turn?

I know I'll get slated for this but I really don't like the 'teacher knows best thing'.because you don't see the individual child outside of school.pinkgirly I really don't think it's in the best interests of the child to say you'd want to leave the child a little longer just coz of what Mum said....

LunaticFringe · 09/10/2011 11:37

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Gotarty · 09/10/2011 13:09

I think this system

hocuspontas · 09/10/2011 13:38

When dd3 was in year 2 they had 'Star of the Week' but it was a totally different type of thing. A name was pulled out randomly, then that child left the room while the rest of the class decided what made that child a 'star'. The child's name was put up on the board for a week with comments like 'Lovely smile', 'Good at lining up', 'I like being her maths partner'. The class were encouraged to see the positive aspects of their classmates. When I saw dd3's I was moved to tears. It was a lovely system.

Original poster

bubbles1112 · 09/10/2011 13:45

That sounds nice hocuspontas, much better

OP posts:

pranma · 09/10/2011 13:57

In dgs reception class there is a 'star of the day' who gets to collect the register and take it back for that day.The teacher seems to make sure that every child gets a turn.He was 'star' on the first day and was very excited about it but now it is just pride in the responsibility.

DeWe · 09/10/2011 14:03

Dd2's teacher seems to be chickening out on star of the day. Rather they didn't have it, but dd2 comes out regularly with it... along with most of the rest of the class. So seems to be a complete waste of time and stickers. They have house points so why they don't just use those, I don't know.

mrz · 09/10/2011 14:35

I hate the whole stupid system ... what's the point if everyone gets a turn even though they may not have earned it or get overlooked because they are always a "star"?

iggly2 · 09/10/2011 15:49

Star of the week I have no problems with if everyone gets it. DS's school system is similar to Hocus's their friends write and say lovely things about the child (I have kept all Ds's ).

I think this balances out the other award system in play (displayed stickers on chart) I have a problem with awards/prizes where not everyone gets them and the reason for there award is dubious noisier children that are actually quiet for a change .

neerg · 09/10/2011 20:54

If we were nearing the end of the year I would suggest that you mention it to the teacher, if you were really that bothered- but not when we are 5 weeks into term. I think your daughter needs to learn some patience. Being part of a class of 30 can be unfair/frustrating at times and teachers are normal people- not demi gods that that get everything right all of the time.

MayDayChild · 09/10/2011 21:27

Bubbles, I posted on this topic after one week of reception, my daughter, like yours, sussed out that her behaviour matched that of the child who had won a prize.
She still hasn't had her turn. It's bothering her mightily. I haven't managed to soften the blow for her either.

Elibean · 09/10/2011 21:36

OP, I would tell the teacher - arse or no arse! Not to try and control her choices, but just because I would let dd's teacher know if dd was upset about/by anything happening in school, if it was ongoing. Perhaps she could explain something about the system to your dd to help her feel better about it, for example...at least, she should be able to

In my dd's case, she worked out everyone got a turn when she was in Y1 - and liked it 'its fair Mummy'. She never had a problem with it, but then some of her friends did - just depends how they interpret it in their own minds, I suppose.

Now in Y3, she has told me that xxxx (a lad who has trouble with focussing/behaving well) was Star of the Week the first week back, and that it 'helped him, I think, because he's really changed Mummy - he's so much better behaved'. So at least in her eyes, it does work sometimes.

Original poster

bubbles1112 · 09/10/2011 21:40

Thanks Neerg...my daughter knows how to be patient. She doesn't cry about it at school, or have a big strop about it. She just tells me how it makes her feel...she feels she works very hard and behaves very well and just doesn't understand that it isn't really about that....she doesn't really see that she has to wait her turn because the children are told it's for good work and good behaviour. Of course I get it, but then I'm 34 not 6!

OP posts:

Chrysanthemum5 · 09/10/2011 21:42

DS is aged 7 (p3) and his class have star of the week but the children all vote for it. So far star of the week has been the most popular children (obviously since it's a vote)but it's nit doing much for the confidence of the quiet children. Personally I'd get rid of it. The children can earn house points for good work, helping others etc so star of the week seems superflous to me.

42day · 09/10/2011 21:42

Actually it could be a lot worse our dc school have a special chair, special cushion, star of the week, special certificates and the kids are not stupid and know that if you are the popular one you will get star of the week most often and if you wait long enough you will eventually get a turn even if it is only one turn because the kids whose behaviour needs to improve get it everytime they manage not to be given level 4 warning after 8 warnings. Best to give your own praise and explain the school ones are there just to encourage the naughty ones to be better so that they don't have lessons interrupted as much!

Original poster

bubbles1112 · 09/10/2011 21:46

I just hate it!

OP posts:

ginmakesitallok · 09/10/2011 21:48

DD1 once got Star of the Week twice in a row - her response? "Miss X just got it wrong." They get table points/stickers/prizes as well.

She did get a Star Speller award at the end of last term, for getting perfect spelling all term {smug emoticon} But I only found it when looking for her gym stuff to clean...

Gotarty · 09/10/2011 22:31

It's just such a stupid, a very stupid way to try to reward kids. It makes me question the person who introduced it and I did but got nowhere.

One reward a week - if all the kids work their butts off equally - I know unlikely but if they did...someone would get it first and someone would get it last - would the first and the last feel they had been awarded equally for their efforts - I doubt it! If reward is only based on random factors what is the point...sometimes you can't help but feel that the people running our schools are lacking somewhat in emotional intelligence.

Our school has a HT's award but it gets given to the kids in the class who deserve it - sometimes there is only one, sometimes (rarely but possible) it's the whole class but it's meaningful and it's based on input and effort.

Unlike our previous school where star of the week seemed to be a random event and when awarded, my kids had no idea how they had achieved it and the poor buggers who got it on the last week felt like shit (one didn't get it all despite being a model pupil) - what had made them the least star like?

Awful, just awful.

pointydog · 09/10/2011 22:37

Meaningless shite, yes

Gotarty · 09/10/2011 22:51

Given how crap I found it I would never have approached the teacher (HT yes but it was fruitless) instead I choose to talk about rewards and what they really meant, how achieving a goal was for personal growth and regardless of how happy it made the teacher or the parents, doing well at school was ultimately for the benefit of the child and that was the goal - not that daft stickers and certificates. Motivation must be developed from within.

skybluepearl · 09/10/2011 23:00

At my sons school it was the loudly well behaved kids or the naughty kids who got the rewards. The ones which were a combination of quiet, well behaved, and hard working flew under the raidar. I wasn't the only parent/child aware of this and was really glad i spoke to the head about it. She was very receptive and agreed with me.

Maryz · 09/10/2011 23:10

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MULLYPEEP · 09/10/2011 23:18

We had a similar situation at a sports class. After many weeks of telling my dd to be patient and wait her turn etc I swallowed my pride and approached the teacher. How much of a tit did I feel when she said that she had given my DD one at the beginning of the year.

ljny · 10/10/2011 00:58

"She just tells me how it makes her feel...she feels she works very hard and behaves very well and just doesn't understand that it isn't really about that..."

Why don't you just tell her? That it isn't really about how she works hard and behaves well, and that she will get her turn.

In hindsight, I wish I'd done that when my dd's were little - we adults can see through this nonsense, but it's quite de-motivating for some children.

OF COURSE your dd isn't patiently waiting her turn - she REALLY believes it's about how hard she works and how well she behaves. And she's bright enough to compare herself realistically to her classmates. Just tell the poor kid.

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