DD will be only Reception Year child at the school

[evolucy7]

I have posted this in AIBU too by the way, but now thought that there may be teachers or others here who may not look in AIBU as much as here

My 2 DDs (5 year old in Reception, 4 year old in Nursery class) are at a small independent school, I have been very happy with this for the 5 year old but I am now concerned about the 4 year old entering Reception in September. I have just found out that she is going to be the only Reception year child, I knew there wouldn't be many and had already spoken to the school about this.

They have mixed classes, this year Reception has been with Yr1, but in September they have said that they are reverting back to Nursery and Reception together. It depends on how many children they have in each year which classes they mix.

I have major concerns about this.

My 4 year old already works at Reception level, and the school have acknowledged this, they said that she was more than capable of working in a mixed Yr1/Yr2 class in September which is what I wanted really rather than being in a class where 80% or so were Nursery children and the other 20% Reception. I feel that the dynamics of a class like that are wrong, particularly if a child is capable of working at a higher than expected level. And also from the point of view of maturity, some of the just turned 3 year olds that started after Easter seem quite babylike and with the mass of the class being much younger the class feels 'wrong' for what I want to be paying for. Anyway I was talked into it being ok and assured that work would be differentiated for her, I still had my reservations though.

Now with the latest news I don't want her as the only Reception child in a class with just Nursery children, I would like her in the Yr1/Yr2 class. She knows all these children well and they are friends, earlier in the year Reception did do some stuff with Nursery, and they do PE together etc. It seems a case of her either being with the year younger or older, and I think older is best. Then there is the question of what happens at Yr 5/6. I could take both girls to a different school now but where at this late stage, and actually I am happy with the school for DD1.

AIBU?

I really am interested in hearing different viewpoints, I want to see if there is something I am not considering here.

I repeat - what are the upsides of this situation?

seeker I repeat

I have been happy with the school for DD1 currently in Reception with 7 in the year. She has been stretched and loves school.

But now DD2 will be the only Reception child, that is where my concerns lie. I only found this out on Friday so have not yet had chance to move them to a different school if I decide that is best.

And in addition If DD2 was moved to Yr1 next year instead of Reception I think I would be happy with that too.

I still don't see an upside for DD2. It isn't the answer to go into yr1, unless she can go to secondary a year early. At her age friends are not quite so important but in year 6 when they are vitally important, and hers will have gone and left her.

Would it be any different for your dd if you moved one day, or decided to put her in a different secondary education to her friends?

Surely that happens anywhere, friends get split all the time because they go to private school, or a secondary in a different catchment. Then a lot go to uni, and split again.

I made a whole new set of friends at secondary because of streaming and consolidation with other schools, I wasn't tied to just the same group I left primary with, is anyone?

I think for me, the key question would be, in the 4 hours or so that she is being educated a day (assuming she will be with other children during lunch, play, assembly etc) will she be stretched to learn and able to do this without distraction in her class, and what will they be doing to ensure this. If not, is it possible for her to enter the other class and what are the school's feelings on this.

Hope it goes well op, I'm afraid this is going a bit circular for me, my son benefits hugely from his school, it's not a hot house, there is tonnes of love and fun, there are best friends in small groups, and yes I do pay for the priviledge.

The only downside was a too early introduction to Justin Bieber thanks to the 9 year olds in the playground.

All the best with your choices.

Secondary is a big change-lots of people go to a different school than friends. Lots move area. They don't however get left high and dry, all their friends having moved on, leaving them behind in yr 6. It seems very odd to pay for this situation.

evolucy7 am I correct in saying this is the school you attended as a child?

Could your happy memories influencing you in this matter?

You say you're happy with the school for your older child - OK. (althought I just can;t see how a class of 7 is a viable social group) But you are talking abotu your reception child. What's in it for her?

It is totally different to homeschooling in that the OP is paying for this and could vote with her feet. The OP is clearly uneasy and whilst we all understand the problems of weighing the benefit to one child vs another, in this situation the DD1 seems happy but the odds seem loaded against the DD2. Maybe there are lots of positives that we don't know about or can't appreciate but on paper, this seems like a disaster! The upside of DD1 being happy and stretched would happen in any decent school and the benefit for DD2 would be immense.

If you are in a grammar area OP are all the state schools oversubscribed now for your DDs age groups? Could you get a place for them or at least DD2 in reception and then DD2 would get sibling status on the waiting list?

When I'm world dictator anyone who uses the word stretched to apply ti anything except the truth and elastic will die horribly.

Didn't you know the rack is an acceptable resource in reception classes?

Perhaps they could stretch DD2 so much that she could be split up into more people?