Thinking of sending DC to average state primary even though I can afford excellent private pre-prep - would you do the same?

[sanam2010]

I was looking at the many excellent private pre-preps here in London before DC was born and had already chosen my favourites, but since DC was born I have had a complete U-turn and want to send her to the local community primary instead - took some time to convince DH but he is now on board. We could afford private for two or three children so looking at other people, colleagues etc it seems my choice is very unusual and I am wondering what people think about my reasoning:

PRO-STATE

• The local community primary is just 0.2 miles from our house, right next to a beautiful local park, whereas all the private schools I like are 10-20min drive. There is one good local private school in walking distance (Thomas'), but it wouldn't be my top pick
• Although the Ofsted report is only "good", the state school has a new headteacher and they do seem to be a vibrant school working hard towards outstanding status. Also, the report notes many children in the school come from immigrant families and have below average skills when they start, but that the school does an excellent job to get them to average level or better, so the teaching is good.
• the report also notes that the school is outstanding in terms of children's welfare and care and that the children are very happy, have a huge playground and that the parents are very satisfied with the school
• In terms of afterschool care, there is an outstanding Catholic school next to it where all children from the borough going to state school can go until 6pm every day, it is organised by the teachers of the outstanding school. The private schools on the other hand usually don't have after-school activities all week and only up to 4.30 or 5pm, so as I work full-time I would have to pay an afterschool nanny on top to pick up the children from school and bring them home and take care of them until we come home from work
• In terms of the curriculum, the state primary teaches Spanish as a modern language, which I find much more useful than French which all the private schools teach. I know private schools can teach other languages but French is compulsory, and as my DC is already growing up trilingually I am not eager for her to have to learn French on top of that at such an early age
• Although we can easily afford private, I still think we could do something more useful with the money. With afterschool clubs, uniform, after-school nanny etc I estimate the cost of private here in London will be 16-20k per child per year, and that will add up over the years
• I guess I can try state and if I am not happy always switch DC to private at 7+, at least I will have saved 60k or so
• I also like the idea of DC getting to know normal children from the neighbourhood rather than being driven to private school further away and only interacting with children of investment bankers and diplomats

PRO-PRIVATE

• The academics obviously, especially as Ofsted report suggests the local state primary does not cater well towards very able children (though it is very good at bringing below average children up to speed)
• In terms of the environment I like the idea of DC studying together with children who have a very good work ethic and desire to learn. I assume that at least at very good private schools the work ethic would be much better

I don't see many more reasons to choose private, so looking at that list you will understand why I am hesitating to even register DC with any of the private schools that I had looked at (I was looking at Cameron House School in Chelsea, Eaton Square School in Belgravia and Knightsbridge School - they all look fantastic to be honest but I am still not sure it is really worth it).

What would you do?

My personal opinion is to agree with stealthsquiggle - a bright, state educated child at age 11 is not going to be so far behind his or her privately educated peers that he or she is incapable of catching up quickly. I enjoyed the freedom of my primary school years and the fact that it was my choice to go on to become quite academic, rather than being a mould that had been set for me from an early age.

Although maybe the headmaster friend of stealthsquiggle's is seeing children who are either extremely bright, or quite bright but have had quite a bit of extra tuition (even if only to ensure firm knowledge of times tables!) to prepare them for the entrance exams to his school?...

I did the same with my kids and have never regretted it. They are doing really well in the good state school and are staying in the State system for secondary. We have a nice house, have used tutoring when required and had holidays. It also allowed me to go self-employed rather than having to have a salary to pay fees and so has given us a generally better life as a family. That counts a lot.

Agree that moving childrn into private at Prep age (year 3) is not such a big deal academically however it can be dificult to break into existing friendships.

I would follow your heart, but keep an eye on how things are going with a view to moving.

We put DS1 into private in year 3 with the intention of doing the same for DS2, they were in a good local village school with only 100 children, but he had a speech issue so we made the decision to move him in year 1.

We had always thought that Pre prep was all cutting and sticking and what was the point in paying but we were wrong - very wrong and we will put DD1 into reception.

Hope it all works out

I made exactly this decision and havent regretted it at all. I'm paranoid about academic achievement and so neurotically compare ds to his privately educ contemporaries and there seems to be no difference apart from his terrible handwriting (but then is public schoolboy dad's is even worse). And the benefits have been enormous to the extent that I feel rather sorry for those friends trekking off in their cars. And you can always move them - all those neurotic types who nab best private places at 3 are too neurotic to hack London and so move to Sevenoaks, Oxford etc thus freeing up prep school places.
I really think you've nothing to lose...

Ps my ds is in yr2 and his times tables are fine (thanks to iPad app)

One advantage of state primary for my girls was the shorter hours and less homework gave them more time for other hobbies like ballet ,piano, playing with friends and even chilling out by watching a bit of telly.

We chose a small independant prep and now that DD is in year two we are applying to local state primaries.

Our main reasons are that she is simply not mixing with a variety of children, it's a very opressive environment with too much emphasis on academics for our daughter who is not showing signs of great academia yet...obviously this coud change but we've decided she needs more interaction with more kids from a larger mix of backgrounds.

We will get her a tutor if needed later. Otherwise she will go state all the way.

OP - I did exactly what you've done, only the other way around.

I was utterly convinced I would send my children to my nearest state school. Didn't even consider doing otherwise...until someone told me to have a peep at a priavte school near to us.

Completely smitten.

Sometimes you just know even if it comes as a bit of a shock

For us it was about breadth of education. I'm sure at 11, they would only be slightly ahead academically as our local state primary has phenominally high SATs results.

But it was everything else that our school offered; lessons in the woods etc that swung it for us.

However, You need to look at what your potential schools offer. There are lots of preps on tiny grounds which offer nothing more than smaller classes, academic pushiness and mums with nicer coats. Personally, I wouldn't have paid for that though for many parents it's that exclusivity they are looking for.

Same here, Dorris.

No matter how comfortably off we are, I'm not handing over thousands without getting some serious bang for my buck.

I appreciate, of course, that what constitutes 'bang' in Casa Litchick, may be little more than a small fffft in other families.

thanks for all the interesting replies.... it does seem like this choice is more common than I thought and I am glad to hear it.

Completely agree that Ofsted reports alone mean very little - it is just the info I am using for now along with the website to make a preliminary decision, in the end I will of course want to visit the school, talk to the headmaster and some parents and decide based on that (and as Litchik says that might lead to a completely opposite choice!).

To those saying I have made my decision already - that's not true, I keep looking for reasons to send DC to private, it's just that I can't see many good ones. I have a couple of years to decide though so I am very flexible about the whole thing. I was just wondering if it makes any sense to register DC with the private schools already and have decided to hold off for now, I might still register her a bit later though once I have looked at the schools.

Agree with many posts saying that private schools might be too academic at an inappropriately early age. I was mainly into sports and games up to the age of 13 or so and became very academic afterwards. I am not sure I would have enjoyed studying hard at age 8 and am not even sure it would have made any difference to my academic success in the long run. I have met a lot of people who were pushed by their parents at a very early age and I never found they outperformed their peers with a more relaxed upbringing in later life.

We don't live in London, but could afford to send dd to a private school if we thought it was important. She goes to a fabulous state school instead, and I couldn't be happier with the education that she is getting there! :)

Have a look around the state school, and see how you feel!

I used to teach in a very academic, high achieving (pupils went on to very competitive secondary schools - St Paul's etc) London prep school with an excellent report in its last ISI inspection. I was very happy there as were the vast majority of its pupils. However, I would still be reluctant to put a child through that system.

The difference with prep schools in London is the enormous amount of pressure on the children from a young age. They were worked very hard and had an enormous amount of homework - far, far more than I give pupils in my current school (have since moved out of London to home counties). The children rose to the challenge and achieved great things, they were highly motivated and an absolute joy to teach. The pace and challenge probably really suited some of the pupils but I did wonder though whether they were missing out on a part of their childhood - whether children need a bit more time to 'just be' which these children didn't seem to get.

I would say, for what my opinion is worth, that two major factors affecting whether a child does well at primary age are a)are they happy? b)do their parents take an interest in their education, ie do they read with them every day? do they talk to them (about anything and everything)? When looking for a school for my children one which is 'outstanding in terms of children's welfare and care' and where both children and parents are happy would get my vote every time. If these are in place, the academic will follow.

Small State primary:
Peripatetic music : recorder, flute, clarinet, saxophone, guitar
Inter school sports : football, netball, rounders, athletics
Large State secondary
You name it.
And the overseas trips are amazing as we are all NOT spending that money on school fees
USA, China, Rome, Spain, France, Germany, Poland, Japan and Russia planned

I went to private.
If I still lived where I grew up I'd go private.
But I don't

I work in an environment where I am the only person who is sending/has sent DC to a state school.

We could afford a private education for our children but prefer that they have more of a balance at this point.

We're saving our money for secondary because I think that's the point at which it makes a serious difference. But that's only if they don't get into a good academic state school (presuming they are academic of course).

OK, well if you haven't visited the schools then that is worth doing before you become too settled with your decision, especially if you're telling RL friends and colleagues.

The ability to pay merely gives you a greater choice of schools to choose from. You still have to decide which one suits you and your family the best. If it is the local state school, take a warm glow from knowing that you're saving yourself a small fortune. But at least you do have options if it turns out not to suit.

optimism - you make some very fair points.

And your description of what makes for successful education is spot on. It was why, imho, the children at the school where I volunteer do very badly, and why the school is so dire.

The parents just don't do any of those things. It makes my heart sink.

"Although the Ofsted report is only "good", the state school has a new headteacher and they do seem to be a vibrant school working hard towards outstanding status"

we sent DS1 to reception at a state primary school that was at this stage. Joining a school that's on the upward curve towards outstanding was just perfect. Perhaps meet with the new head once more before making a final decision? So much about the school will depend on him/her. You want to feel that you "click" with this person. A good question to ask is about what changes s/he has made and wants to make to the school - that should give you a good sense of priorities.

I emphathise with wanting to be part of the community and agree this is terribly important

Well if you visit the local state school and really like it, then I'd be tempted to suck it and see give it a go. You can always consider a move to private schooling at say 7+ if things don't work out. IMO you should be ale to support your dd quite well yourself at infant level, in terms of helping with practising and enjoying reading, and learning basic maths facts etc if you feel that the school is not stretching her quite enough! Meanwhile you could put some of the money you save in an account to help pay for your dd's university fees should she choose to study at that level later on! If I were your dd, I'd certainly be thanking you for that at age 18!!

able - not ale!

"Although the Ofsted report is only "good", the state school has a new headteacher and they do seem to be a vibrant school working hard towards outstanding status"

A good new head can make a massive difference. Ours turned the school around from special measures to good with outstanding elements within 18m.

No, I wouldn't. Already I see a huge difference between the local, outstanding CofE primary and my DD's selective pre-prep (in reception). That said my daughter really needs the extra challenges and individual attention on offer at her school. I would register your daughter everywhere as soon as possible (if she is born already you may already be too late for some places in the area you live in!) and make a decision much later placed on your view of her and what will suit her. Different children flourish in different environments - a very bright child will not get the stimulation she needs in a school where many others in a class of 30 have English as a second language. Equally a child that needs extra help may not always find a top pre-prep particularly supportive or helpful to her needs.

"a very bright child will not get the stimulation she needs in a school where many others in a class of 30 have English as a second language"

I totally disagree with this - at some schools possibly not but not at all. Bright kids at my dd's school (which is not "outstandin"0 are stimulated plenty and there are lots with English as a second language.

I agree - register her to keep your options open, then look at the schools.

And tbh you need to focus on advice given to you by people after their DC have transferred to secondary. We went state primary, private selective secondary and it has worked out fine for DS1. But should DS2 fail to get into a selective secondary I will be less sanguine about our decisions!