DTwins in different schools - Is it practically possible?

[rebl]

Do you think it would be practically possible for me to have dd and ds (twins, in reception) in different schools?

Can drop off dd at 8:40 at N school, 7 min drive to K school so could be there at just before 9 with ds.

After school ds to the after school club on Monday - Thursday for 15 mins whilst I get dd. No idea how much that would cost though. Some friends from N school have said that they could get dd 3 days a week anyway so then maybe don't need the after school club for ds?

What are the chances of sports day, nativity, parents evening etc being on the same days?

I'm going spare with this. I just can't see dd happy in the alternative school (K). ds isn't doing well in the current school and communication from school is zero which just makes me angry. He's definatly more settled but quite frankly if they can't even be bothered to answer our direct questions about his reading then really there is no point writting in the book. They're not helping us at all with helping him to read at home yet expecting us to do it. They haven't even bothered to write in the book about what the sensory service have suggested to do about the missing radio aid reciever (went missing on Thursday but its unclear whether it was lost on the school grounds or not) and whether we need to be claiming on our contents insurance. I question whether they've even bothered to call them tbh. I'm not allowed to speak to the teacher in the morning and she's not even there in the evening (no ta or teacher standing at the door making sure the reception children go to their parents/carers anymore). She doesn't write in the book so whats the point? I give up. DS is not going to achieve his potential in a school like this and I want him to achieve his potential. He's been pigeon holed in to the trouble maker, on the special needs register with low potential therefore low attainment and poor social skills are acceptable. Thats not him, I know its not him.

ruby There is a lot of back history to this though as well. He's got out of school which school didn't think was serious . They've actually said that they don't think its the right school for ds.

tbh i think i would move them both.

clearly there is more to this that you;ve discussed before, so i can't understand all of your post.

but do you really think your dd would be unhappy in the other school? why would she be unhappy but ds be ok?

Make an appointment to see the head, as a starting point. I would be very concerned- reception children allowed to just wander off from the school doors?? I agree with thisisyesterday that you should think about moving them both- it wil be a huge amount of hassle to have them at separate schools and from what you have said I would have big doubts about leaving a child at the current school.

Two schools is certainly do-able; those of us who have separate infant and junior schools are used to that. I have spent the last three years shuttling between two schools four miles apart (finally, for one solitary year they are all three at the same school ).

I could never get to school B in time for pick-up, but they were allowed to wait in the library (but they were juniors of course; not sure it would be so easy with infants).

You get the odd clashes with school events, but not as many as you'd think; the most irritating is that inset days are rarely the same, necessitating two days off work.

But I second what Ruby says - don't be too hasty moving schools.

We've seen the ht with regards ds walking out of school and it appears to have been sorted (the gate is now locked). But at the same meeting we discussed the lack of communication and were told that it would be improved. We've seen no improvement what so ever. To really grate dd's book is written in every single day singing her praises on how good her reading is. DS's is rarely written in and on important things (like please claim missing radio aid on your contents insurance or LEA insurance are covering it) they just can't be bothered to tell me either. Honestly, today DS read (according to both him and dd). No comment in his book. No new words sent home. So what did he struggle on? No idea. We've had these same words for 10 days now. DD read today and her book has 5 lines singing her praises, giving her a new book, how well she read the new book at school. Could I read it with her at home. Shouldn't they give the time they're writing in DD's book to the struggling child and the one who needs support? I think they've written him off as a lost cause. They've said as much when they said they didn't think it was the right school for him didn't they?

it's possible. mine were in 3 different schools, all a drive apart, with slightly different start/ finish times.

but as others say - different days off is a pita. and it's exhausting.

for the first time ever they are in the same school now. i spent weeks giddy with delight.

i'm not a huge fan of moving schools because of 'difficulties' so early. you haven't had time to build a relationship with the support team. i assume you had transition meetings from nursery?

call the school secretary and ask for an appointment with the senco and class teacher. ask to see ds's iep for this term, and chek that the target setting is in line with sensory tean recommendations (or any other therapists/ advisors he sees) ask if he is on sa+ and if he needs any additional support with meeting his iep targets (and what they are putting in place)

all of this you will need to know if you are looking for a new setting in any case. why do they not think it is an appropriate setting for him?

I had ds (SEN) in one school and dd in the local school. Not twins but only a school year apart purely because the local school wasn't right for ds. I used after school club or friends and managed quite happily through school. It was undoubtedly the right thing for us all.

Haven't got an IEP, they say he doesn't need to be on SA+, only on SA. I have brought this up with the HT again since it being brought to my attention on here but she's addament that even though he has outside agency involvement he doesn't go on SA+. The thing thats really pissing me off is the total lack of communication and I've brought that up time and time again and its not improving. They're writing in DD's book EVERY DAY. They rarely write in DS's book. Why? TBH I couldn't give a flying monkey's that DD's reading is fantastic, it was fantastic yesterday, and the day before and the day before that and every day that she's been there. Why bother to repeat that in her book and not bother to give support and feedback to the struggling child? The only answer I can come up with is that they've writen him off.

They clearly don't know the 1st thing about SEN. They're answer to why he's not on SA+ illustrates that. Their answer to his problems is that he needs a bigger school where there are more resources for him.

what resources does a bigger school have? what resources do they not have that they need?

i'm utterly unable to understand why he doesn't need additional help, but they don't have the resources to do it.

find out who your sn governor is (sometimes chair of govs) and ask them to become involved to help you clarify the issues - as you are having trouble understanding why your child apparently doesn't need additional support (no iep) but the school claim it is not an appropriate setting....

I remember your other threads,to be honest given that he is deaf I would have thought there was no question of a statement,have you contacted the LEA to find out their criteria etc.

The school sounds hopeless TBH and I would move both,I know it will be hard for your dd not to be in her own village/area but she is young enough to settle and with a bit of effort should be able to keep up with her local friends

I would try taking your complaints further tbh, especially about the lack of communication as there are able to communicate so easily about your DD. I would request another meeting with SENCO and class teacher and/or the head. Ask to see IEP- he should have one even if he isn't on SA+. Give them 2/3 things that you expect them to change (starting with writing in his book at least every 2 days). Give them a deadline for when this has to happen, e.g a couple of weeks. And tell them that if it doesn't happen you will take your complaint to Ofsted. Oh and copy any written correspondance, notes of meetings etc to the chair of governors. They have a duty to provide for your son and saying 'This isn't the school for him' is a complete and utter cop-out.

there are two completely separate issues here though - the fact he has a hearing disability, and the fact that he is on the sn register and has been labelled low attainment. the two do not have to go hand in hand. and if he is on the sn register (even on sa) they should be able to discuss what support they are giving him to ensure he meets his potential.

does your lea have an sta that deals with the practical issues of being deaf/ having hearing difficulties? can you contact him/ he for advice?

sometimes statements can be given so that the dc can attend a school with a hearing loop - no idea whether this is helpful in your son's case or no. (dd2 was statemented for pd, but had ieps running at both ends of the spectrum)

the third issue is they believe he is a troublemaker etc. have they set out a behaviour plan or discussed this issue with you? make sure they do.

Do you know rebl, if you applied for statutory assessment one of two things would happen:

a) You would be granted straight away (likely, given his HI).

b) You would be turned down, but you would get a detailed list of why, including that the school need to have him on SA+ and that they need to make use of the home/school book, etc.

Furthermore, it would be a huge sign to the school that they need to watch their game, because at any other time, you could repeat your request, and they would have to supply evidence of what action they have taken with regard to your DS's SEN.

Also try Parent Partnership for your LA and ask them to support you.Google them.
Totally agree with Lougle - you have right to ask for stat assessment and nothing to lose. Whatever happens re the statement outcome, the process will identify needs and is work for school!
I am a Primary Head by the way!

www.ipsea.org.uk/ will help you find out your rights and the school's responsibilities. As will www.sossen.org.uk/ Some parent partnerships are better than others but be aware they generally have close ties with the LEA and might not be as impartial as you would like or need.

Thank you Lougle. You have just put that in such a clear way that dh totally agrees and for once we're agreeing . At last dh and I agree on something with regards our ds and his schooling.

Rebl - the only thing I don't understand is why you don't move both of them from that school which is clearly so terrible.

If the school is no good with SEN - it won't be good for DD either. There will be other kids in the school with SEN. They will be failed. And their failure will end up impacting on DDs learning....

Indigo Because she's so happy and settled and I don't want to cause her unnessary upset but over the course of tonight I'm seeing more and more that she shouldn't be there either.

DH didn't realise that they're still failing on safe guarding. He's just twigged that. The fact the reception children are coming out with no teacher or ta is not good safe guarding. All in all the school is failing and you are right indigo. Its just that we don't see dd happy at the alternative school but then maybe we're not giving her enough credit for her ability to adapt and she'll be fine.

Rebl, I am so glad. Well done to both of you, and hooray for your DS to have you both agreeing.

Sorry, have come to this late and realise there have been previous threads.

What are the NDCS like these days? They were a huge support to our family when my brother (profoundly deaf) was at school.

It is possible to have children at different schools, one of our local schools last year was so oversubscribed that 2 siblings didn't get in, but obv. an inconvenience you could do without.

Agree that it sounds like your DS should have a statement. It may be that if the second school can meet your DS special needs better (eg qualified teacher, specialised facilities - obv I know little about your situation), you may be able to get help with transport (a bit scary for reception I know.)

Sorry if I've just shown you how to suck eggs, Good Luck

How can a four year old withhearing difficulties be labelled a troublemaker;words fail me

For that matter how can any four year old be labeled anything

I'll call the NDCS today. We have a family support worker assigned to us from them.