So what 'stereotypes' do I need to look for amongst the other parents at the school gates?

[Ceebee74]

Just wondering as I saw someone refer to a 'Queen Bee' on another thread and I thought ooh yes, I definitely know who that is at my DS's school'.

What others are there?

I am probably the 'harassed working mum'

I am feeling slightly awkward with my cycle helmet and one trouser leg tucked into my sock mum, as I take off from the playground and cycle to work. There are three of us in the school. We run the gauntlet of buggies, toddlers and big groups chatting in pinch-points, and I personally have only once in four years rammed someone's legs (it was an accident honest!) when she suddenly stopped in front of me!

I am not riding the bike in the playground obv. Just pushing it along.

I fear my DH is the dad who thinks he is gorg.
He is a really chatty guy, knows more people than I do, a loves chatting to women.
I say he is a flirt, but he isn't really. I think he only figured out how to do it well when he hit his 30s!

I take my children to school in one of those bike trailer things, as often as I can. Though a lot of the time I am take the car. I think I rule myself out as a sporty mum by doing that.

Our village is so cliquey. You are either in (pref born and bred) or you are not. You might get a chat but mainly an indulgent smile and then a back.

I worry that I am the up her bum, we don't like her very much mum, cos I am just not one of the gang.
I have therefore also become the mum who has a friend who I ought to just move in with and be done. Both outsiders, we do chat to each other more than anyone else.

I am not sure how many of these titles fit, for me. They all seem to morph into a village gang, all dressed pretty much the same, part time work.

I'm childminding mum, who gets treated like the child snatcher (or whatever he's called) from Chitty Chitty Bang Bang.

oh Im sunglasses mom in my defence sometimes its just glasses and not sunglasses

oh and I can be very disorganised mom with kids all over the place!!

we have a very loud friendly please notice me I am funny and want to be your friend mom

a my child has just gone to school and dont have many friends mom

a very all the moms fancy me dad, who is doing my head in because his dd is in my dds class and he is far to arrogant for his looks

very young and very old moms all of whom are great fun

pained grandparents

this thread has made me laugh

Today, I was Cardi-on-inside-out Mum.

My favourite one at our gate is Hangover Mum. Big glasses, always clutching head, moaning about another night out with the girls, leaps into her 4x4 to health club for a coffee and a swim. I ADORE her, but she probably should drink less, esp. on a school night.

I think to be a proper sunglasses mum you'd have to be appropriately orange... our particular iteration also wore a complete ski outfit at school pick up when it snowed last year (it's only Co Durham ffs, not the arctic). I think she's a founder member of sunglasses mum-club.

I'm the "feeling self conscious and rather sweaty having run from the station in my suit" mum

I am Always Late Mum.

Actually, I'm Always Late Everything. But that's because I'm actually very ambitious and believe I can always cram 100 tasks into the last five minutes before leaving the house.

Ahem. And I clearly have a gift for rebranding my crappest personality traits!

Oh well, nobody's perfect.

Recognise many of these!

I am in-my-gym-gear,no-make-up mum in the mornings and you've-had-all-day-why-still-no-make-up by the afternoon!

We have PTA alpha type mums, one sweary mum, several Boden mums and a couple of jolly, big mums and 2 have-lost-shedloads-of-weight mums.

I am "Oh God, how do I tell you I don't really remember you" mum.

First parent night for dd last year, nice man and slightly suspicious wife came over, he remembered my name (maiden name), several friends in common that I vaguely remembered, have this sinking feeling, I may have gone out with, had a bit of a fumble with one of his friends TWENTY YEARS AGO!!

I love this thread - so true!

I've been several in my time - mostly Disorganised Harrassed forgotten it's Sports Day/Cake Sale Mum, Dog-walk mum, and Been There Done That and can't really be bothered to get out of the car and chat Mum.

I was PTA Chair Mum for a year, and they really do see you coming and suddenly find something very important they need to rush off for!

I've know a few Scary Controntational Mums who fall out with the friends, or shag someone else's husband, and end up having proper fist-fights and screaming matches in the playground.

At our DDs former primary we had:

The three witches (strolled along to school smoking, shrieking and in one case, smelling of whisky at 8.45am)

Mrs Hitler (five kids, incapable of communicating without yelling constant commands)

Mrs Chest - always wore something revealing even at minus 6 degrees

Moaning minnies who always loudly insisted 'I'm not having THAT!' when their kids were told off by teachers, but never actually took it up with the teacher,

and loads of alternative types in velvet skirts and straggly hair.

Me? Dashing in at the last minute mum.

Velvet skirt/straggly hair Mum is usually Bonkers Children's Names Mum as well, isn't she?

I'm definitely been tere done that Mum. I always tried really hard with the other Mums when my first 2 DCs started school. Now they are teenagers and I'm starting all over again, I recognise all the cliques and just CBA with them at all.

I definitely recognise joined at the hip couple... I always wonder why they don't take turns.
Lots of long suffering grandparents at our school, some seem to love it, others have that 'God I thought I'd finished with all this' expression on their faces (not dissimilar to my own)

Also
Eternally pregnant Mum (could also be me)

'I'm really cool' Mum.. talks VERY LOUDLY, drives a weird camper van thingy (brand new though), calls her children 'unique' names and assumes everyone wants to be her (they don't)

I would be "Flustered Always on the Last Minute" Mum.

Oh just remembered 'extreme weather dressing mum'

Her DCs are kitted out in sun hats,sunglasses, factor 100 suncream at the merest glimmer of sunshine. If it's a bit wet.. wellies,umbrella,raincoat combo. A slight breeze... furry hat, mittens, scarf/snood....

Whereas my DCs lose any gloves I buy for them on the first day of wearing them so spend most of the winter with their hands up their coat sleeves....

Never there mother although that's partly their age that they come home from school alone. In most countries children manage the school run alone but we seem to prefe to molly coddle children and collect them at quite old ages in the UK.

Kat- I think that extreme weather dressing mum is just a slight deviation from competitive mum. These things are clearly not done for the child's sake, but for the mum to look as though she is caring enough to make them uncomfortable by bundling them up like Michelin men--. Most children don't even get that cold. My sister is an overdressing mum (think 4 layers on her toddler +hat when it's 20C). She actually got told off at the hospital when she had her third for overdressing him (underwear+thick babygrow+ cardie+ blanket+ hat in a maternity unit ffs), which is good

Such a funny thread. I have been doing the school run for 14 years now and I've met them all.
What about'Loud ,know it all Dad' (not remotely trendy or even good looking !)

"School is beneath me" mum, who shows up at the school gate for the first time sometime in March and has to ask the other parents who her child's teacher is.

Our chool is almost entirely a mix of glam mum and Queen Bee mum; tehre's probably a few harassed working mums but theya re masked by the glare from teh fake tan of teh glam sect

I am a mix: late mum who lives nearby, mother odf disruptive child with a generous dash of worthy mum who spends her life fighting LEAs, doing fundraising and the like.

Except i'm not; that's my Mn and school persona.
Reality is different andbased on greasepaint and performance but they don;t need to know that. The outer is my defence.

'I think to be a proper sunglasses mum you'd have to be appropriately orange...

It's running joke amongst us non in crowd mums that the only reaosn the chool is so popular is becuase it is sited between a tanning and beuty salon, and a GPs that offers botox out the back.

it's actually probably true though, judging by the shade of a great many parents.

It's funny seeing these - I recognise quite a few!

I laughed out loud at Always Late Although She Lives Very Close To The School !!
Definitely me. I was determined to break my previous track record, but now I am Morning Sickness Mum, take pity on me! I haven't told anyone at school yet :)

Xenia Mon 11-Oct-10 23:34:35
Never there mother although that's partly their age that they come home from school alone. In most countries children manage the school run alone but we seem to prefe to molly coddle children and collect them at quite old ages in the UK.

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I'd love it if my lad (8 years old) was allowed to walk home on his own, it would save me rushing down there either on my bike or back on the bus he is perfectly able to use a pedestrian crossing or use the school crossing patrol. Not sure if he could use a bus yet alone but I could try him!

I agree, we do mollycoddle our kids, I live in Greater Manchester but its not a bad area, we live about 15-20 mins walk from school and if he was allowed, 10 mins cycle but he has to do his cycle training first and he has 2 years to go yet until he is in year 6. The cycle lane is rubbish though, I'd rather he walked or used the bus.

mum2luke- how about this course for him next summer: www.mcfc.co.uk/News/Club-news/2010/July/Get-on-your-bike-at-City-this-summer