11 year old daughter just asked when she can start shaving

[SantasRubiksCube]

DD is 11 and has very dark body hair like me. We've always reassured her that both boys and girls have body hair and it's completely natural but as she's getting older she's becoming more self conscious. She showers more as gets smelly quite quickly and she's just asked me what age you have to be to be allowed to start shaving as her armpit hair makes her feel quite self conscious when she's wearing sleeveless clothes/changing for PE etc. I explained again that it's natural and normal and there's nothing wrong with it but she asked again. I said how about we bleach it so it's less noticeable without having to remove it but she said no. I don't want her to feel she has to remove her body hair just to avoid any comments or anything but on the other hand I know how hard it is growing up and being hairy. I just wasn't sure what to say so told her we would discuss it later as I was abit busy making dinner.

My 11 year old wants to start shaving, can anyone recommend a good starter razor that’s easy to use please?

I'd do an electronic lady shave

Buy a good safe and smooth Venus razor together. I don't understand why you have to convince her it's natural etc. it is ok to mention that she can choose whether to remove the hair or leave it but to be honest it's a nice feeling for most women to have shaven armpits and legs, it is not just about perceived societal norms. She is looking after herself this way, which is great, and it is a good sign she is asking you for help rather than doing something like cutting herself with cheap unsafe (some else's) razors secretly.

My daughter started with an electric razor means for a face to get some practice and now uses a venus razor with the soap thing attached as it's just easier for her to manage (just checked - venus spa breeze)

Thank you @PurpleThistle7 and @Smoronic sounds like electric is the way to go first.

Let her. I wish my mum had let me when I first asked as I have pale skin and dark hair. When I finally was allowed I was so happy!

Great that you can have a chat about it and give her some advice both practical and more social too @SantasRubiksCube . Maybe ask her if anyone in her age group has recommended a shaver they use or if she's seen anything herself that she wants to try? Obviously, if it is she comes back with a daft suggestion you could steer her away, but it might be a nice way of making her feel like she is the boss of her body, if it is a suggestion she makes herself that you support.

I think it's great you're telling her that body hair is normal! If she insists she wants to try, maybe you can help guider her on how to do it safely so as to avoid her going off and learning it about it herself that's potentially unsafe. There's loads of expert-backed articles on we are luna she can learn from about body hair and how to shave safely. That way she can figure out if it's really for her or wants to try bleaching or other methods x

Just let her do what she wants. My mum controlled a lot of me, growing up, and for some reason, I was permitted to use hair removal cream but not shave. It all does the same thing. The earlier women are able to have autonomy over their bodies, the better.

It’s her choice though, not yours.

Tbh I’d far rather have an 11 year old shaving than bleaching her body hair.

Yes let her, my mum wouldn’t “let” me shave but I felt self conscious so I used to borrow her razors and do it anyway. Would have much preferred her to gently teach me what to do and taken me out to buy a small razor for myself.

I love love love we are luna - saved me so many awkward conversations. Glad to meet another parent who knows abot it too x

We had the same with ours becoming curious about body hair and body changes. As she navigates these new experiences, we were looking for additionalr esources to help her. We found the "Girls Guide to Growing Up book helpful" in understanding the why around things happened. We also decided to download an app on her ipad for confidence and girl empowerment and chose the Luna app. There she has realised she is not the only one with body hair, or hairy upper lip. It's there to promote body confidence and is empowering. Girls can ask questions to experts and see what others are asking too, it's a really nice app, I wish I had it when I was younger! Really recommend came from another mum at the school x

Oh also another good app and resource is the rebel girls?

Is there any gender woo on the Luna app?

At the moment, she wants to remove it. In the future, she may not. You've explained that there's nothing wrong with it so leave it up to her.

I believe it's made specifically for teen girls, that said I think boys can use it's just the content, the features the look and feel feel quite tailored made to teen girls!