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Preteens

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Original poster

1st period

36 replies

Mammy2girls · 27/07/2023 09:00

Hi all, my daughter will be 10.5 in Sep, we started with breast buds last Nov which is the norm for her age. My only problem is she was only 125cm then (she has always been small) she is 132cm now. Her puberty seems to be going very fast…as in her breasts have moved on slightly from buds and we have public hair and slight discharge now, I’m terrified she will get her period soon and have her growth stunted, according to dr google they should get a total of 25-28cm after they start puberty which would leave her 5’ or close to it which is as always what her height prediction was. I just feel puberty seems to be flying, she is my first so not sure if that is normal, I though she would have breast buds for over a year before they would grow and the discharge is also scaring me, anyone else have a really small for age girl and things worked out ok ?

OP posts:
Polik · 30/07/2023 12:45

Using language like 'terrified' to describe normal developmental changes in your daughter is concerning. It might be helpful to tone down the drama about all if this. The development you describe is not abnormally early or fast.

Maybe spend some time processing your own emotions on this? She's going to grow up, it will happen, that will involve hair growth, hormones, periods, having sexual feelings, acne, mood swings, wanting to impress boys... and all the rest. These are sll developmentally normal and nothing for you, as a parent, to be afraid of or have negative feelings about.

BananaBender · 30/07/2023 12:54

She sounds normal. Nothing to be scared about. Some people will be short.

Periods generally start within 6-12 months of discharge starting. Buy some period products, talk to her about them, make up a little bag to keep in her school bag (including clean underwear) and leave the rest where she can easily access them.

Period pants can be great so perhaps buy a few different brands if your DD is interested in using them. It might take a few brands to find out which ones she prefers and work best for her. Lots of threads on here about period pants if you do a search.

Original poster
Mammy2girls · 30/07/2023 17:33

Hi polik from my post you will or should see I’m not actually concerned abt her development or her period per se and I realise it is normal, I am “terrified” about her height at the stage of development, she is tiny and I’m not sure she will make it to 5 feet, that’s my issue I’m not in any way afraid to chat to her, I though you would have got that from my post, quite obviously not :( I have every right to be concerned at her developing at 125cm, so I see now this is not the place to voice my concern with a reply like yours. It isn’t appreciated. I did ask at the end anyone else have a small girl developing !

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mondaytosunday · 30/07/2023 17:38

How tall are you and her father? And even if 5', not the end of the world! My friend's daughter is 4'11" (she's 18), and is going to an excellent university, has a boyfriend and is a keen horse rider - so where's the disadvantage?

Original poster
Mammy2girls · 30/07/2023 17:41

Thanks for reply bananaBender, I will def look up the period pants, I’m actually ok with her developing and we have had the chat about it. I’m just afraid that her growth might be stunted with starting puberty at her her height, but look I guess it out of my control really.

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Original poster
Mammy2girls · 30/07/2023 17:45

Mondaytosunday thanks we are 5’3” and 5’6” yeah I’m just a bit concerned with the discharge starting now that her period is close, she is only 132cm and all the talk is that no growth much after period that she may only end up 5’6 or 7

OP posts:
Original poster
Mammy2girls · 30/07/2023 17:46

Mondaytosunday sorry I mean 4’6”

OP posts:
Polik · 30/07/2023 18:16

Mammy2girls · 30/07/2023 17:41

Thanks for reply bananaBender, I will def look up the period pants, I’m actually ok with her developing and we have had the chat about it. I’m just afraid that her growth might be stunted with starting puberty at her her height, but look I guess it out of my control really.

Exactly. There is exactly zero you can do about the fact she's approaching puberty, regardless of her height.

She's not unusually early in developing, so it wont be medically delayed. If she's going to be short, she's going to be short. It's not like that's an awful thing. Lots of people are short

Polik · 30/07/2023 18:19

5'3 is really short for a man. 4'6 us really shirt for a woman.

There's a very high chance she'll be short too, it's just genetics. You must have realised that?

FawnFrenchieMum · 30/07/2023 18:23

DD was short and a younger than you DD when all of the above started (pubic hair at 8, breasts at 9). She had a sudden growth spurt at 10 and started her periods at 10.5. She’s still only 142cm and hasn’t grown since. I don’t know if she will continue to grow or not, but nothing I can do about it except be positive for her.

redsky21 · 30/07/2023 18:29

Polik · 30/07/2023 18:19

5'3 is really short for a man. 4'6 us really shirt for a woman.

There's a very high chance she'll be short too, it's just genetics. You must have realised that?

I think OP was correcting the height her daughter might grow to, not the height of her and her dh

Original poster
Mammy2girls · 30/07/2023 19:01

Thanks redsky21 yes polik I am 5’3” my husband is 5’6” Redsky was correct I was correcting the height my daughter might grow to. You must have relaxed this !

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Original poster
Mammy2girls · 30/07/2023 19:02

Realised this !

OP posts:
Original poster
Mammy2girls · 30/07/2023 19:08

Fawnfrenchiemum has your daughter grown since she started her period ?

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Snoopystick · 30/07/2023 19:09

You can always contact your area’s healthy families team and ask for advice. My DDs the other end of this - 14 and a half and no period yet, she thinks she’s the last one in her year (that she knows about) not to start. I’m going to contact the HFT if nothing at the end of summer.

OhcantthInkofaname · 30/07/2023 19:24

Just make sure she has superior nutrition so that she can gain the height she would genetically have. It is true that height in girls tends to slow after menarche. But some girls continue to grow until 21. Boys can continue to grow in height till 25.

Cyanchicken · 30/07/2023 23:32

I grew two inches from when I got my period so from about 5'5 to 5'7? I got my period at 13.

Fullofpudding · 31/07/2023 00:06

I started my periods at 10 and I'm now 5ft 8. I obviously wasn't 5.8 when I started them!

BananaBender · 31/07/2023 01:06

My DD is likely to be less than 5 feet. One of her doctors referred her to a paediatric endocrinologist, mostly because she was quite short when her periods started. The paediatric endocrinologist did an assessment of her growth and development, including X-rays of the growth plates in her arm bones. The endocrinologist also needed to know my height and DD’s dad’s height to get an idea of genetics.

The endocrinologist estimated that DD will be less than 150cm but that she was otherwise developing normally and no medical intervention was indicated. Her growth plates were still open meaning that she still had more growth to come. She has grown a bit since then but not much.

All that we can do is make sure that she has good nutrition so her growth isn’t impaired at all, and point out the positives of being short eg not likely to struggle with leg room in cars etc, easy to find things on low shelves because she won’t have to bend as much, and things like that.

CC1991 · 31/07/2023 20:21

I was an early developer and am short (barely over 5 foot), however I do come from a short family so I'm sure that plays more of a role than the timing of puberty in my case! Up until about age 13, though, I was 'in the middle' in terms of height relative to my friends. By 15 I was the shortest.

Puberty seemed quite fast for me too - I remember going from breast buds to first period in about 18 months (starting around my 9th birthday). From what I've read, this is slightly faster than average.

CC1991 · 31/07/2023 20:22

I.e. puberty starting around my 9th birthday and periods at 10-and-a-half.

Secondrater · 31/07/2023 20:29

My daughter is 9, very tall (143) but no breast buds/hair. But she has had discharge for a couple of years, not all the time. So I'm not sure discharge is necessarily indicative.

They say around 1 year from breast buds? Or period starting when they hit about 7 stone?

sentinent · 31/07/2023 20:32

Myth: menarche means the end of growth is near
The reality is that the average gain in height after menarche is about 7 cm (3 inches), and it is even greater for girls who menstruate on the early side of normal.

gogomoto · 31/07/2023 20:33

My dd is 5'2 and an officer in the armed forces. What is the problem with being short??? Being small she can fit into smaller places, an advantage in her field