DD got nobody to go trick-or-treating with

[scarecrow22]

DD has struggled socially, on and off, through primary. Next Sunday most of the girls in her class are going to a Halloween party held by one of them. A few others are going out in a pair, at a family party and overseas. DD has only one friendship at school, with a girl in a parallel class, who is not allowed to go trick-or-treating. Result, she has not a single person to go trick or treating with on Sunday.

To my dismay, both my children are obsessed with Halloween. More so than Christmas. She has built it up so much over the year that she is distraught. And I can't blame her - it is one of those moments when she feels the loneliness of having had either one or no friends throughout school.

There are underlying issues we need to deal with, clearly. But so far I've reached out to a couple of parents unsuccessfully, tried to encourage her to be part of the young kids sweet-raid that runs each year in our road, and suggested that some years life is a bit shit and next year hopefully she'll be out with her new secondary school friends and this year will be the past.... None of it has consoled her, and I get why.

Does anybody have a clever idea for how I can distract her, repair the problem.... ANYTHING? My heart is breaking for my tumultuous, warm, kind, creative girl.

Thank you for reading this, and for any ideas.

Why can't you just take her trick or treating yourself? My DDs friends live in the next village so we have always done that.

Then hot buffet tea (her favourite) and she is in charge of dishing out sweets to trick or treaters when we get back.

@lollipoprainbow We are in exactly the same position. Even down to the one friend. Sadly (though I respect the decision entirely) her friend cannot t-or-t because of their faith. DD has no other friends - not a school, not from clubs or sport or drama (I encourage clubs outside of school because of the problems she's had there).

@applechips thank you for sharing that with me - it was a great kindness. DD and I are both hoping very much that secondary school will be where she finds "more people like me" as she sweetly puts it. If she doesn't I think I will desiccate from hurt.

I've taken the advice of some earlier posters and have told DD the situation sucks and stinks, and hopefully next year she'll be in a totally different place. But we also don't want to ruin all of half term. So she can go about with her brother and/or other kids in the street, or go around with me ("Er, NO THANKS!"), or we can go to a movie in the nearby town and have a Five Guys (we eat out about once a year, so this is a BIGGIE!). She said she'd think about it, but she was also very calm, which was good.

I can't believe how many kind and wise people there are out here.

Well done OP