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Preteens

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11 year old saying "like" all the time

109 replies

Beccabell · 14/12/2011 11:52

My 11 year old dd (year 7 at secondary school) has started to use the word "like" constantly as a filler in her conversation. It's not just the odd one or two, it's constant. For example "It was like not there" "that's like so cool". She's been doing it for a while now, but it has got worse in her new school. I think they all do it, but she takes it to a new level. I am starting to worry about the future - interviews etc. I know it's a teen culture thing, but really she is doing it "like" all the time!! Do you think there is any cure for this, or any way I can get her to do it less? I'm even thinking about bribery - a prize if she stops doing it so much. The trouble is, she's not aware of doing it. It's driving me mad.

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belledechocchipcookie · 14/12/2011 11:57

I'd, like, give her a, like, give her a box so that she can, like, put in a fine of, like, 50p every time she says it. It will, like, make her think about what she says, and, like, take away money and stuff. That's, like, cool. Like.

Beccabell · 14/12/2011 11:58

Aaggh belledechocchipcookie. Is that you dd?

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belledechocchipcookie · 14/12/2011 12:00

Xmas Grin They all do it. I'd ignore her, it will encourage her to think about what she's saying.

StopRainingPlease · 14/12/2011 12:34

We take our DD literally when she does this. E.g. "We had, like, maths today." "Like maths? But not maths? What could that be? Was it physics?" Grin

I found a great Desperate Housewives clip on this, where Bree has found an employee stealing from her.
Employee: "So am I, like, fired?"
Bree (smiling): "No, you aren't like fired. You are fired." Smile

StopRainingPlease · 14/12/2011 12:39

Incidentally, I think kids do need to learn to speak in different ways to different people, and that what's acceptable amongst their friends isn't necessarily acceptable elsewhere. This goes for slang, swearing, certain topics of conversation etc. We have had to point out to our kids that just because they and their friends find jokes about poo funny it doesn't mean that we want to hear them! (Especially at dinner.)

If they can't adapt their speech to different situations it will be a disadvantage in their future lives.

DiscoDaisy · 14/12/2011 12:39

StopRainingPlease My Oh does that to our 11 yr old DD as well. It drives her mad! Grin

Beccabell · 14/12/2011 13:41

StopRainingPlease - yes I do that too. When she says something like "they're in like the washing machine" I say - "in like the washing machine - do you mean the dishwasher?". Makes me feel a bit better, but doesn't make a difference. She might grow out of it - maybe older teens will associate saying like with the younger ones and want to differentiate themselves. Here's living in hope...

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EatMeDates · 14/12/2011 13:42

This is just the beginning. You wait until she is well into her teens and starts dropping proper slang!

Beccabell · 14/12/2011 13:44

But then again I suppose I should put it into perspective. My nephew is Autistic and barely speaks at all. It's a silly thing to worry about one word really in the scheme of things.

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PattySimcox · 14/12/2011 13:45

Sympathy Becca I have a 13yo and a 7yo who copies Xmas Hmm

DiscoDaisy · 14/12/2011 13:48

My elder DD used to do the same but now aged 15 she does tend to speak properly most of the time!

Beccabell · 14/12/2011 13:51

DiscoDaisy - that gives me hope!
And PattySimcox - my 7 year old dd is starting to copy my older dd too. I'm trying to stamp it out before it gets set in.

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CeliaChristmasFete · 14/12/2011 13:54

OMG I like SO know what you're like saying. Xmas Grin For a generation who invented text speak to communicate quicker, they do know how to prolong a conversation.
Best ignored if you can!

Beccabell · 14/12/2011 14:04

I know I'm bleating on a bit about this now - but I do think teachers are too accepting of it. DD did a LAMDA drama exam, and they have to answer questions and talk about the text. I tested her with some questions for the exam and she must have said like about 20 times in one answer. I spoke to the drama teacher about it and asked if she would me marked down and she laughed and said no - they all do it, the examiners are used to it. I don't think that's quite right really - you need to be articulate in this sort of exam. She got a distinction despite the "likes". I would have been harder on her!!

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timetosmile · 14/12/2011 14:07

I would like 'like'.
We get " that was very good " "that was well sickage".

CeliaChristmasFete · 14/12/2011 14:10

Xmas Grin at "well sickage" !

Everything was "the pits" when I was a teenager.

Orlando · 14/12/2011 14:17

It's the accompanying intonation that drives me to distraction. Everything is made to sound like a question, the first part is always rushed and the last word goes on for, like aaaaaagges?

Beccabell · 14/12/2011 14:18

Is "well sickage" the new "wicked"? Oh my I am behind the times.

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Beccabell · 14/12/2011 14:22

Another thing I've noticed - the likes and intonation going up at the end is a really girly thing - it's very camp in males. I guess it's just the girlies doing it. It winds me up because dd seems to be such a ditsy airhead when she speaks, but she's not really.

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Quodlibet · 14/12/2011 14:34

I've noticed in some kids the amount of 'likes' increases at times when they're feeling less confident. It's a kind of linguistic tic where they're essentially undermining what they're saying while they're saying it. I teach uni students - all extremely bright and articulate, but particularly when they are speaking in front of a group the 'like' ratio goes through the roof. I do think it's worth them becoming aware of it - in a hugely competitive jobs market they're always going to sound less self-assured than someone who like can like express themselves without like always sounding like they're not like quite sure what they're like talking about.

SquishyCinnamonSwirls · 14/12/2011 14:43

Copy her. Her Mum doing it, like, all the time, will be really, like, annoying.

I do this to dd. Everything is "random" at the moment. However, it clearly isn't. It's clearly very annoying. Me doing it back to her is apparently even more annoying. Excellent.

bananamam · 14/12/2011 14:47

That is like, soooo random!....random was "in" when I was a teenagerGrin

takeonboard · 14/12/2011 14:47

My mum was always correcting my speech when I was a teenager - over use of slang and exaggerating a strong local accent - I thought I sounded so cool Grin TBH her nagging just made me worse.

I moved to London when I was 18 and everyone either took the piss out of the way I spoke or couldn't understand a word I said, there is nothing like peer pressure.....I was speaking the Queens English (well not quite!) within a year, much to my mums relief!

Beccabell · 14/12/2011 14:49

Oh yes we have "random too" - "It was like really random" being a favourite.

It does go up when she's unsure of herself - it's like saying "er" or "you know". I do imitate her to make her realise how stupid it sounds, but I don't want to make her even more unsure of herself, so I only do it every now and then.

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somebloke123 · 14/12/2011 15:06

The first time I got this was when I returned from the hardware shop:

DD "What's that?"

Me: "A watering can."

DD: "That's soooo random!"

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