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Preteens

Parenting a preteen can be a minefield. Find support here.

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Original poster

11 year old saying "like" all the time

109 replies

Beccabell · 14/12/2011 11:52

My 11 year old dd (year 7 at secondary school) has started to use the word "like" constantly as a filler in her conversation. It's not just the odd one or two, it's constant. For example "It was like not there" "that's like so cool". She's been doing it for a while now, but it has got worse in her new school. I think they all do it, but she takes it to a new level. I am starting to worry about the future - interviews etc. I know it's a teen culture thing, but really she is doing it "like" all the time!! Do you think there is any cure for this, or any way I can get her to do it less? I'm even thinking about bribery - a prize if she stops doing it so much. The trouble is, she's not aware of doing it. It's driving me mad.

OP posts:

takingbackmonday · 14/12/2011 15:08

Random was cool when I was a teenager. I remember when being described as 'random' was the greatest accolade.

How utterly random.

whojamaflip · 14/12/2011 15:08

Not got to the stage of like or random but ds (8) uses "basically" like its going out of fashion - everthing is basically we did this and basically that happened and basically it was basically great. Never thought a word would drive me up the walls so much. Mind you I spotted someone on tv over-using the same word in an interview so seems to be a common thing

Quenelle · 14/12/2011 15:09

Have you heard anyone using the word 'next' in random places? I was on jury service recently and it came out in our deliberations that a lot of young people talk about 'the next man' or 'the next taxi' when they just mean 'the man' or 'the taxi'.

LittleWhiteWolf · 14/12/2011 15:09

Random reminds me of being a teenager. Everything was random. I can live with my SIL (12 in Feb) saying random or like or even sick, but I do correct her when she says "ain't". I figure I have to pick my battles!

My sister does an annoying shortening thing. Instead of saying "blatently" she'll say "blates." She also uses "totes". She's 24, definitely old enough to know better!

LieInsAreRarerThanTigers · 14/12/2011 15:09

Yes I think it has just replaced 'um' and 'er' as a filler, but my dd also uses it in place of the verb 'to say' so she SAYS 'And he was like, "Blah blah"' and I was like, "Blah blah" and the teacher was like...
I do tend to encourage her to use 'said' instead. I do worry that they just won't be able to stop doing it in an interview or making a presentatino and they will lose out.
I have noticed that even quite posh kids do it though, so maybe it will be a level playing field!

gramercy · 14/12/2011 15:09

I remember reading a post on here about someone whose dh interviewed a girl whose reply to What's your name? was "Er, like, Emily?"

Dawndonnathatchristmasiscoming · 14/12/2011 15:11

We did a penny in a box for a week for using 'like' inappropriately. The kids were quite shocked when we had £3.74 at the end of the week. Seems to have worked, most of the time!

LieInsAreRarerThanTigers · 14/12/2011 15:12

whojamaflip that reminds me of when we were being shown around workplace nursery for ds and everything was 'obviously'. Some of the things were not that 'obvious' at all and the poor woman was fitting in 2 or 3 per sentence some of the time! I think that was also a sign of nerves.

LikeAnAdventCandleButNotQuite · 14/12/2011 15:14

I'd pounce on it at home, but not care about it used amongst her friends. I dont necessarily think it'll go with time as my DSis was turning teen at the start of the 'Like...Whatever' generation and still speaks like this now (at nearly 20). She's perfectly eloquent when required, but slips into this speak when with her friends. I think a lot of that has come down to my DP's picking her up on it when she wasn't around her friends.

CailinDana · 14/12/2011 15:20

This thread is pretty hilarious. I'm sure the vast majority of you could imagine your own mums writing very similar things about you when you were a teen about your pink hair or your sullen manner. I'm sure most people used silly slang when they were teenagers, it's completely normal and getting your knickers in a twist about it is so...mumsy . Most people learn to modify their language in different situations, don't worry.

NotADudeExactly · 14/12/2011 15:32

A few years back I supervised some work experience kids at the hotel where I worked. One moment has stayed with me:

The elderly, very angry mother of the groom at a wedding we were hosting was having a virtual meltdown in the lobby over something or other. My extremely cool placement student on my instruction was to take her to the bar. His words?

"Madam, you like need to chill", followed by the offer of a drink.

I didn't know whether to laugh or cry.

maypole1 · 14/12/2011 15:33

Oh yes "random" we have that he's always saying oh mr..... Said my home work was good that was soooooo random

I hate it also he always uses Nag.com as well he says oh mum your such a nag.com

The whole thing is mental as long as he no it has his place than its fine I have to remind him now and again I am not one of his mates he needs to stop the slang

ReebleBauble · 14/12/2011 15:57

My younger sister is not exactly articulate when it comes to conversation. The words 'like' and 'yeah' crop up far too frequently and there is an inflection at the end of every sentence as if she were asking a question? Yeah?

Shes 22... I'm putting this down to the fact that shes true Bristol born and raised and they all seem to do it. I moved away to pip pip Berkshire over a decade ago so my accent and dialect has faded a lot.

But God help her if she finishes another phone call with 'Yeah, like, in a bizzle?'...

falalalalagirl · 14/12/2011 16:06

Honestly, I wouldn't worry about it. I assume you model 'good' speech at home so it's not as though she doesn't know what it sounds like. IME (as a secondary English teacher) the vast majority of kids are perfectly capable of speaking 'properly' when they need to (e.g. for speaking and listening assessments when it counts towards their English grades).

So long as the English syllabus hasn't changed by the time she's Y11 then she may very well have to write an essay about her own idiolect and learn all about accomodation theory and sociolinguistic maturation. She will be mortified when she listens to recordings of her lazy speech and realises how much of it is filler!

Persephoney · 14/12/2011 16:39

My favourite from my DD1 is...

Then she turned round and said "bla bla" so he turned round and said "bla bla"

I have images of people twirling during their conversations.

RainbowSheep · 14/12/2011 16:45

I always think of mumsnet as a very non-judemental site, and then I stumble upon threads like these

knockneedandknackered · 14/12/2011 17:01

THAT IS LIKE SO SICK sick is what there using at my daughters school.

Lisatheonewhoeatsdrytoast · 14/12/2011 17:03

Yes i used to do this as a teenager, everything was "like"

I grew out of it, and my mother pointing it out all the time, made me do it more

susiedaisy · 14/12/2011 17:06

Arrrgh my 11 year old does the same, like like like in every conversation drives me mad!

Vickymumof2 · 14/12/2011 17:32

My two aren't at this stage, but I saw this and had to show you this clip of Peaches Geldof - show your daughter this, maybe it'll help:

It'll give you a laugh at any rate!!

PercyFilth · 14/12/2011 18:00

As regards this usage:

uses 'like' in place of the verb 'to say' so she SAYS 'And he was like, "Blah blah"' and I was like, "Blah blah" and the teacher was like...

Personally I rather admire this very economical way of reporting a conversation. Using "like" in this type of construction is shorthand for:

"Please understand that this is not a verbatim account of the conversation, I am merely giving you the gist of what was said." :o

AWimbaAllTheWay · 14/12/2011 18:04

God this is going to drive me insane. My eldest is only 5 and her excessive use of "actually", put on baby voice and constant dropping of the letter t already irritate.

Dee03 · 14/12/2011 18:14

My 12 year old ds comes out with Jank...everything is Jank!!!!! It's driving me insane.....I say rank but apparently that's old school now.... The new term is Jank

beatenbyayellowteacup · 14/12/2011 19:04

Basically, this thread is bare long.

Jajas · 14/12/2011 19:09

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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