Want to talk about my positive abortion experience

[flowerpotwomen]

I had a termination a month ago. When I say 'positive experience' obviously it's not something I would ever have wanted to do. But it happened.
I had a medical abortion at 9 weeks and was expecting hell after reading horrendous stories on the internet, so I'm putting this out there for balance.

Deliberated for a few days after discovering I was pregnant and decided I couldn't continue with the pregnancy for many reasons. Rang BPAS and they booked me in for an appointment in 4 weeks time. I took the appointment, though a few days later realised that would put me past the threshold for being able to have a medical abortion at home, so cancelled it.

Called Marie Stopes who got me a quicker appointment at a local NHS hospital. I went a few weeks later and discovered I was 7 weeks and 5 days pregnant. There was a friendly older midwife as well as a trainee present. They did an internal scan which I was scared of, but I barely felt it and it was done very discretely. She didn't even look as she did it, and she didn't show me the screen. They talked me through my options. I decided on the medical abortion and wanted to go home to pass the pregnancy rather than do a day in hospital.

I came back the following week, on Tuesday. I took a pill orally and was told this would help to end the pregnancy, some nausea and spotting is normal. I didn't have any side effects and went about my day as normal.

The next day, Wednesday, I came back in. I was given four pills and told I could take them orally or have them inserted into my vagina. I decided to take them orally. They also gave me a suppository antibiotic. I was terrified of this but was told how to insert it myself and did it in the bathroom - it was fine and couldn't feel it after 5 minutes.
I was told to expect cramps, pain, and heavy bleeding. I was only in there 15 minutes.

My sister picked me up and took me home. I went straight to bed around 10am. I watched Netflix and read magazines pretty much all day, and drank lots of water and ate snacks. It was quite relaxing to be honest! Around 1pm I started feeling light cramping, nothing bad, but I took 2 ibuprofen and 2 paracetamol anyway as a sort of preventative.

Around 2pm I felt a gushing sensation, went to the toilet and a large amount of blood came out as well as some sort of sac or clot. I didn't really look but I could feel it coming. It didn't hurt at all. This happened every 30 minutes for the next few hours. I had no pain at all, just occasionally felt the like blood was going to come, went to the toilet, and it did. I never flooded my pad or anything like that. By about 5pm I was just bleeding like a normal period, changing my pad every 3 or so hours.

I slept really well that night. I did sleep on a towel just in case as I do leak even on normal periods when I use pads which is why I usually use a mooncup.

After 3 days the bleeding went down to being very light - I just wore a panty liner every day for the following 2 weeks in case of any blood. There was usually a small amount.

Took a pregnancy test 3 weeks after the date of the abortion and it came back negative.

I have no sense of regret or sadness about the situation - it wasn't the right time for another baby, I was just relieved that termination was an option for me. It was so much simpler and less painful than I thought. The staff in the hospital were kind respectful and non-judgemental, too.

If anyone has any questions I'm happy to answer them.

Oh. I’m having medical tomorrow and didn’t realise an upset tummy was a given. I have had friends who said it was no worse than a period, and some who said it’s like labour so I guess it’s juts luck. I feel it’s the right decision for me as I don’t want to go under GA and I also got an infection during my last labour after an internal so didn’t fancy anything like that again. Bluth I’m sure you should be offered surgical if you prefer, it sounds like the nurse wasn’t very thorough.

I had the one appointment for everything so it was over in just one day. I had no sickness, bad pains or side effects but I was affected a bit when I passed the pregnancy. The worst part for me at the actual clinic was the transvaginal scan which lasted about 15 minutes and I was exposed the whole time.

I didn't mean to be down on medical I think it's great that we can have access to something like that. I think most women would prefer what feels more natural (essentially an induced miscarriage) to a 'procedure'. I am sure it's less of a shock for the body.

I had to push for the surgical as I felt it would be better for me. I do believe that cost comes into it too though. Obviously with the NHS it's free at the point of need but medical is cheaper so that's undoubtedly another factor in what I'd recommended.

I had a medical - had decided beforehand on a surgical but never really had the option as the lead time was so long. I was determined to avoid the medical due to the scary stories out there, but didn't want to be any more pregnant when finally being treated so with a lot of trepidation took the pills.

I needn't have worried at all - I don't doubt some women suffer a bad reaction but in my case it really was no worse than a heavy period, to the extent I thought it must not be working. I was 7 weeks and passed the sac about 5 hours after taking the suppositories. The sac was identifiable as 'different' somehow from the other blood, but I saw nothing frightening (no baby) and suffered no trauma from the experience itself. I consider myself very lucky.

I would definitely recommend taking the codeine about 20 mins before the suppositories and keep it going (within the dosage rules of course!). The nurses say it's for when the pain gets too much, but I wonder if by that point it's too late, hence some find it much more painful. I never actually felt any pain, just some general discomfort. Heavy bleeding/clots lasted about 4 days, light period type for a fortnight after that.

Sorry if all that is TMI, just wanted to share a positive experience. Good luck @Bluthbanana and @Tinyteatime

Also re sickness - I took the antibotioc at the first appointment, so the sickness occurred on that day, not the day I had the main pills. On the main day I had no sickness or diarrhea.

Thanks everyone on this thread for sharing their experience. It made me feel better. I believe mine is now complete. I was really scared taking the 2nd dose but I really needn’t have worried. No sickness, very mild cramps, nothing worse than a period. It was so ‘not painful’ that I’m also worried it might not have worked but I’ve definitely passed something and now the bleeding has eased like they described. I took ibuprofen and paracetamol. Good luck to anyone else going through this.

Good news for you @Tinyteatime

Here's to you, and to a speedy recovery.

I think I can count my experience of the actual termination as a positive one, but will say that I feel that my care from the midwife could have been more tactful. Took the first pill on Wednesday - was in and out of the appointment in 2 minutes. Felt totally fine, had a little moment of “sorry this wasn’t the time for you, embryo” then drove myself home and had a normal day. Yesterday I took two Stugeron travel sickness tablets with a light breakfast, then two hours later took the 4 tablets that I had to dissolve under my tongue, followed by the antibiotics. I started to feel crummy within 10 mins - shakes, chills, cramping and a bit of diarrhoea but no sickness. Bleeding took 3 hours to come on and was never so bad that I soaked through any of the massive maxi pads I got. I didn’t see the pregnancy pass but I had a few trips to the toilet for clots to pass but that had stopped by the evening. Day in bed with a binge watch and lucozade. Woke up today and all the pregnancy symptoms I’d been getting were gone apart from the mega-boobs, and the bleeding is much lighter. I’m completely at peace that the decision to terminate was the right one for me, DH and our DC, and I’m glad the waiting game is over.

And yes, the cramps were never so bad that I wasn’t able to cope with a heated wheat bag. I didn’t have to take any paracetamol or ibuprofen, which I usually have to take for my worst period days.

Looking to see if anybody might have the same experience

I am a mum of 3, found out 17/04/20 I was pregnant, this was unplanned and was the result of a 1 night stand, I decided on an abortion and had no doubt in my mind it was the right decision, on 20/04/20 I

Hi, I'm petrified of having this done this week, was it really OK? Thank you

What a really valuable and thoughtful post flowerpotwomen, thank you so much for taking the time to share your experience.

to you and everyone else who need them

@Leona12 I have just started the process today. Here to talk if you need someone

My medical failed, I bled and everything went as expected and 3 weeks later I had an internal ultrasound cause I was still testing positive and der was still a fetal pole, I was booked in for a surgical 3 days later and had a mirena coil inserted at the same time, we have no idea why it failed I was only 4w +2 and i was 7w+3 having a surgical, i was reassured from day one that it was ok and der was plenty of options for me,

Hi,
So after years of being told I couldnt have children, I found out a few weeks ago that I am pregnant. I instantly wanted a termination. I'm too scared of pregnancy and labour and have never wanted to be a mum so my mind was made up right away. I have my appointment to take the first pill next tuesday & I'm that scared its driving me crazy. I suffer majorly with mental health issues so this is a huge fear and upset for me.

I've read so many scary stories about the pills and what happens after taking them.. can any currently in this situation help ease my mind? 🤷🏻‍♀️ scared and feeling very alone.

Hey,

I was really scared about going through with the abortion because of all the scary stories I came across online but honestly it was actually not as bad for me....just cramping (period pain that makes you move around a bit) so pain you can handle....the painkillers I took were ibuprofen 400mg and codeine 30mg every 4 hours on the dot (be consistent with the painkillers) but don’t go over the daily amount recommended. Also have heat pads or hot water bottle this is for comfort.

I am 27 and had decided to go along with the medical abortion because it was the right decision for ME. I was basically 7weeks pregnant (the earlier the better for medical abortion in terms of pain)
I had contacted Marie stopes and they sent me out a package with everything I needed to go along with the process.

So I took the first pill that stops the hormones at 4:00pm Friday afternoon and I made sure I ate before and had load of water. I was fine had no side effects and went about the rest of my day as normal with no pain & no bleeding.

Saturday I ate and took 2 ibuprofen 400mg and 1 codeine 30mg at 6:41pm I then inserted the 4 pills in my vagina (you can do it under gums) it was really easy, I just laid on my back and relaxed and pushed them as high up as I possibly could this was at 7:00pm straight after I went up to bed to try to allow the pills to dissolve because I was worried they would fall out and I was worried about the pain.

At 8:00pm I went to wee and saw no blood and had no pain so I went back to bed, 15 mins later I could feel some movement but still nothing.

9:00pm I went to wee again and i saw a little blood (like spotting) but still no pain so went back into bed.

10:00pm i went to check again and I could feel mild period pain and started passing clots the size of an almond nut.

10:30pm I had to top up on ibuprofen and codeine as pain was mild/strong (period cramps) because the painkillers were wearing off.

11:30pm I was fine no pain as painkillers kicked in just bleeding clots in the toilet and this is when I felt as if I had passed the baby because clot was bigger and I actually felt it come out (this was not painful) after sorting myself out and changing my pad I managed to fall asleep until 10:30 am

Woke up with mild period like pains so topped up on with ibuprofen 400mg as the pain wasn’t that bad.That was the last time I took painkillers no pain all day.

I’ve been fine just bleeding as if I’m on my period, no pain and it’s now 4:00am. I have no more pregnancy symptoms I just feel a little weak but that’s understandable.

Ladies honestly it isn’t as bad as some of the stories we have all read. It’s a very bad period pain that’s consistent if you don’t take painkillers.
You feel the period pain when the painkillers are wearing off for about 1 hour until the actual painkillers kick in again.

I will take the pregnancy test in three weeks just Incase.

You’ll be fine I promise xx

I realise this thread is from last year, however I have found myself pregnant with no4, and no3 is only 8 months old.. we are done and are not in a position to add another baby. I'm looking to arrange a medical abortion, I'm only around 4-5 weeks so early enough. I'm so glad I came across your thread, as it gives me hope it won't be as bad as I'm imagining, I did have a miscarriage many years ago, but I was 12 weeks then and that was horrific, I'm dreading this will be like that was 😔

Also to add, hubby is on waiting list for the snip, has been since may so this was an absolute mishap x

@Ajjxx hey! I, like you, have found myself pregnant (I'm just over 6 weeks) and have a surgical abortion booked for next Tuesday. I have never had one before and am completely pooing myself!

Maybe we can help each other through??

Yes of course x ah bless you, did you opt for the surgical option? I've seen that Marie Stopes can send the pills out, so Im hoping I won't have to actually go in to a physical appointment, I just want it done and over with as quickly as possible now x

@Ajjxx yes I opted for it.... I have emetophobia so I'm scared of being sick and I was told you're more likely to be with the medical option.

I went through BPAS - they did offer to send them through the post. When will you get yours?

Have you ever had one before? How you feeling about it? X

No never, I've not called them yet, planning to do it tomorrow. That being said I've just been struck with really awful stomach pains so I'm not sure what's happening rn x

@Ajjxx how are you this morning? Did the tummy pain amount to anything ? X

No, altho it's been a busy t niggly again this evening 🙄 I've spoken to Marie Stopes and have a phone consultation and then have to collect the pills on the 23rd.. timings awful as I didn't want this over Christmas but the sooner the better, the next date they had was the 29th x how are you doing? x