spikeycat, my age gap was planned - horribly broody even when ds was 6 months. Had to hold off cos of thyroid medication. Started trying the minute I came off the med,, (ds 8 months) esp as loads of stuff I'd read said condition can lead to infertility which scared the pants off me. i kinda thought we might be trying for ages, so better get cracking. We scored straight away!
Anyway, re the comments, everyone assumed the pg was a mistake which really pissed me off. I had comments like "don't you mind, dear? - granny-in-law! Ooh it's going to be so hard. Ooh they're close! etc.Everyone was negative. I'm crap with dealing with such comments, so just got pissed off each time! Spent the whole bloody pg annoyed! Only one person said congratulations - and that was a stranger on the bus when I was out alone without ds1! I am sensitive anyway I suppose, so I found that the hardest part. People are just so rude, opinionated & ignorant when you're pg! I guess all the neg. comments actually made it seem easier, iykwim. So many people had gone on about how hard it would be, it didn't seem as hard as they made out. Am I making sence?
Now everyone thinks they're twins( similar size), and when I say they're not, I get loads of comments about them being close, but others with similar gap, but normal size kids! don't get this. My elder is small and my younger is big, so they're the same weight, height (nearly). I suppose I should just lie & say they are twins.
Just to reiterate, it's a great age gap & i rally hope your dp doesn't react in the way you're fearing. Can you really keep it a secret? I'll be very impressed if you can! All the best!