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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

am i naughty??

35 replies

winjy · 07/01/2010 15:24

found out my 12 weeks scan wont be for 3 weeks and by then il be nearly 14 weeks so thought id take matters into my own hands sooo...i phoned ante natal department and said i been having cramps (i have but not as bad as i made out) and they got me a cancellation to be scanned tomorrow at qtr to 4 (im 11 weeks today) am i bad?? i mc in june and am going out fo my mind waiting to be scanned another 3 weeks id prob be sectioned!!

thoughts please!!

OP posts:

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harleysmama · 07/01/2010 15:38

i would call you creative, hope ur scan goes well!!

jbakedbean · 07/01/2010 16:33

I don't think your being naughty. If anything getting stressed wouldn't do the baby any good so much better to be a bit creative with the truth and put your mind at rest.

Original poster

winjy · 07/01/2010 16:40

thats what i thought...my dp said im becoming a nightmare and my mother told me i need to relax and seeing the baby is the only way i will relax for the next 3 weeks so im just lucky i got an appointment so soon...and just goes to show what can happen when u do things yourself!!

OP posts:

Mama2b5 · 07/01/2010 16:46

Sometimes its not good to make up such a ermmm story i call it a "jinx effect"! what if thats what really did start happening, how would you then feel, but from all whats happened to you prev, i understand why, just try not to make a habit of it, good luck and hope all is well with LO.

SoleLundyFastnet · 07/01/2010 16:47

Hmmm - having had a number of MCs myself, I do understand how stressed out you find the waiting, but the appointment that you have got (and, really, don't need) will mean that someone who really does need to have their mind put at rest will have to wait.

I think 'naughty' is the wrong word to use - I do think it might be a bit selfish. I have had to wait four days to find out whether my baby was ok following a heavy bleed (she wasn't).

I think you have to try not to 'take advantage' of the NHS - it is overstretched as it is and there are people who have real needs who will be bumped down the queue because you can't wait 3 weeks.

cakeywakey · 07/01/2010 16:49

Well, you can pay for scans privately, but if that's not a option, and considering you miscarried last year, it's not so naughty. Hope all goes well for you tomorrow and that your mind is put at ease

Drooper · 07/01/2010 16:50

Understand why you did this- and good luck with the scan. But.. what if someone else with a more 'genuine' need has to wait because you exaggerated and took that slot?

Bleatblurt · 07/01/2010 16:51

You probably have to wait so long for your scan as so many other people have made up stories to get extra/early scan. So, yes, you are naughty.

DwayneDibbley · 07/01/2010 16:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

badietbuddy · 07/01/2010 16:56

What everyone else has said. BUT- why on earth do you have to wait til 14 weeks anyway? Do your trust not do a nuchal as standard?

Fibilou · 07/01/2010 16:59

I agree with posters that have said you've been a little bit selfish. What if another Mum really needed that space ?

Also please be aware that the scan only makes you stop worrying for about 3 days -you can't keep on lying every time you want to see the baby or hear its heartbeat

MumNWLondon · 07/01/2010 17:02

My 12 week scan (actually at 13+4) was a nuchal scan... if I'd needed an emergency scan it wouldn't have a been a nuchal scan just a quick check.

And in response to what the others said I didn't even get a 12 week scan with DS (had to pay privately) as all appointments full and I wasn't deemed to be a priority, never occurred to me to make up a story to get a scan so a bit selfish to demand a scan when no real need.

reikizen · 07/01/2010 17:04

Don't think for a minute that the staff who saw you that day were taken in by your story, we have seen it all before . And I bet you will now find something else to worry about, as as Fibilou says, nothing can guarantee a healthy baby. Try to address the underlying feelings which you have (quite reasonably) following your miscarriage and enjoy your pregnancy.

bexaa · 07/01/2010 17:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

albinosquirrel · 07/01/2010 17:27

my bil (a GP) actually suggested claiming to have had a bleed to get an extra scan ( i had just confessed that as I was paranoid I had paid for a private scan) - he did say he wasn't entirely serious but that a lot of people do do that.

bronze · 07/01/2010 17:33

I know of people who do this and I hate it. Having genuinely had a very traumatic pregnancy where I've had to wait for scans because people like the op have done this (I know theyve told me at the time at the clinic) it makes me pissed off

Not even sure what Ive said makes sense

Its selfish and a waste of resources

Original poster

winjy · 07/01/2010 17:43

wow didnt realise id cause so much upset...i havent lied, i am experiencing cramps and i have to wait til 14 weeks becuase they have messed up my notes...
i had a horrendoues miscarriage in june and had to wait week after week for scans as the nhs was 'stretched' as u put it...i cannot afford a private scan and am worried sick that i will mc again...im sorry to offend u all, i am not selfish just worried and want reassurance that my baby is ok....think il just delete this thread!!

OP posts:

Fibilou · 07/01/2010 17:43

It makes perfect sense, Bronze. I hope it makes OP rethink her plans and wait her turn like everyone else

Fibilou · 07/01/2010 17:46

Winjy, you asked if people thought you were being "naughty". If you don't like what people have said you really shouldn't have asked. Lots of people have really awful times conceiving and the system would melt down if they all went for scans when they felt like it. I know it's worrying but I'm afraid you'll have to get used to it because pregnancy makes you acutely worried about everything.

thedollshouse · 07/01/2010 17:46

I can understand why you did it and I think you did the right thing.

I was a nervous wreck until I had my scan and it would have been difficult to have waited until 14 weeks. If I had told a white lie to get an earlier scan it would have been selfish of me because I had not had a previous miscarriage. However in your case I think it is unreasonable of them to make you wait bearing in mind your previous history.

Good luck with the scan, I am sure everything will be just fine.

mazzystartled · 07/01/2010 17:54

it's queue-jumping and a bit dishonest (saying "naughty" makes you sound as though you think you have done something endearing.)

fwiw i understand that the guidelines are for first scans to be offered between 10 and 14 weeks (certainly are in our pct), so really your given appointment wasn't unreasonable

that said, had you rung up and told the truth - the cramping, your anxieties - the chances are that they would have found you an earlier appointment. or not, and you could have chosen to go private.

hope everything goes well for you tomorrow

Original poster

winjy · 07/01/2010 17:58

mazzy thats what i did say...i said i had cramping and i was really worried due to mc...thats how i got the appointment...

OP posts:

DwayneDibbley · 07/01/2010 18:10

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

mazzystartled · 07/01/2010 18:12

that's not what you said in your op

Morloth · 07/01/2010 18:13

Then why are you asking if you think you are naughty?

"(i have but not as bad as i made out)" personally I would be worried about tempting fate exaggerating something like that to get people to react...

Someone else who isn't making out that their cramps are worse than they are may now have to wait while you have your scan.

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