Er.... perineal massage

[blushes]

Right, rather personal question, but I hope somebody will be able to help...

I'm almost 23 weeks and am planning to start doing some perineal massage soon.

However, I am very- well- sensitive down there and suffer from recurrent utis which are irritated by cosmetics and fraganced products.

Can anyone recommend a nice, natural type oil which won't irritate my delicate lady parts? Or do I not need to use oil at all?

Thanks in advance!

You wont neccessarily tear anyway. I have had two children, and didnt tear with either, or be cut, and didnt do any massage - so all hope is not lost.

I swear by raspberry leaf tea though. I drank gallons of it, and both my little 'uns were out in a couple of minutes once i started pushing. In fact, there wasnt much pushing involved!

I agree with the raspberry leaf tea, flubdub - stage 2 was only half an hour for me and stage 3 almost instantaneous.

But it shouldn't be started before 36 weeks. I started at 40.2 weeks and was on about 3x normal suggested dose - didn't bring on labour at all, I was induced, but I firmly believe it helped with everything else.

Thanks for the reassuring last few posts So you shouldn't drink rasperry leaf tea before 36 weeks? Thanks

DP did this for me and I am not sure if it related but after one session I got up and my waters broke. Can't see an obvious link as it is a different area but have always wondered. Was 37 weeks and ds1 arrived two days later after inducement.

What an excellent thread! I echo all your questions, blushes. I am 31 weeks and starting to contemplate (with a goodly amount of suspicious face-pulling) this perineal massage business. Sounds like it definitely can't hurt. Figuratively speaking.

I did the Tara Lee yoga DVD last night and believe I may have in fact strained a pelvic floor muscle. Am limping a bit today. Will focus more on the relaxing next time!

What exactly is raspberry leaf tea supposed to bring to the pregnancy party??

I used normal olive oil which my Midwife recommended as no additives. I pretty much did the massage every other days for the last couple of weeks of my pregnancy for roughly 3 mins. You basically dip your thumb in the oilve oil then put your thumb inside yourself a couple of inches and then do a sweeping movement from one side to the other pushing quite firmly. You will really notice a differenc e in how your muscle/skin down there stretches over time and it stops feeling uncomfortable after a while. It really worked for me and I had no tears and no pain killers or gas and air during my labour. The most important part though during your labour is not too push as soon as the baby's head comes through and just let the contraction birth the baby. That way you wont force your body. The hypno birthing book by Marie Mongan has a really detailed section on this and it's excellent.

sassmonkey, see my blog on the use of raspberry leaf tea etc. for info on it.

Hello, I did a very little bit of perineal massage during the late stages of my pregnancy and used olive oil. It is definitely safe enough for down there. I have to say I wish I had done it more though. I had a good short first baby birth (7 hours and no pain relief) but I think the perineal massage would have meant no tears.

Instructions - well.... Make sure your nails are short, specifically your thumb. Have a warm bath or shower and put a towel on your bed. Dip your fore finger and thumb in the olive oil and go in just about over an inch. Imagine you are firmly massaging the lower half of an egg cup and strech the skin between your vagina and bottom.

Sorry about the egg cup - but that is what I visualised - I know this sounds silly but it worked

Have to say I couldn't reach to do it myself.......am worlds least flexible person though.

While we're on this subject - there is the contraption called the epi-no which stretches the pelvic floor. I am only 31 weeks first pregnancy so haven't used it yet - not supposed to start until about 36/7 weeks I think - but I can really imagine (and hope!) it helps with the stretching and also getting used to the feeling of the head crowning. I am aware that some people will think it's a big gimmick though and not worth it.

I blew it up to 10cms the other day and was feeling a little daunted though . Our antenatal teacher really recommended them actually so fingers crossed. It also will make me feel that I am doing what I can to prepare my body for the birth! Anyway, just thought I would throw that into the mix...

Do you massage outside or inside??? Im sure I read somewhere that you had to put your fingers inside and massage but that cant be right surely??

I had a go at it with my first pregnancy. It was only after DD was born that I realised how much stretching you'd have to do to prepare for birth though - I'd been a bit feeble.

I'd second the advice about not pushing when you crown: I didn't realise I was pushing (but I was), I felt something stretch down there, I pushed and was very surprised when a baby appeared (as were the midwives - no one thought the baby was that close!). I ended up with a second degree tear but to be honest the stiches were fine and it healed up within a week or two.

I didn't tear with DS (was careful not to push at the critical momnet) and didn't notice much of a difference recovery-wise post-birth compared with when I'd had stiches.