Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Flip

1 2 3

Original poster

Bit gutted - sonographer referred to baby's gender at 12 wk scan

53 replies

twoshakes · 09/03/2009 21:08

Had our 12 week nuchal scan today and am over the moon that the baby is healthy and all measurements were as they should be etc. We told the sonographer that we didn't want to know the sex, but at one point during the scan she said "oh she's such a wriggly baby". I know it doesn't matter and we really don't mind whether it's a boy or a girl. But I so loved the moment that DD was put on my tummy after she was born and they announced that she was a girl. I was just really looking forward to that moment at the end of this pregnancy and after a hard labour!

Just wondering if this has happened to anyone and they've ended up having a surprise anyway?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

BriansAmazingBeard · 09/03/2009 21:44

dd was a ds at 12 weeks

she is defo a dd now at 7 months

scrooged · 09/03/2009 21:45

I remember asking at the 12 week scan, they said they couldn't tell.

lockets · 09/03/2009 21:45

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

xfabba · 09/03/2009 21:47

scrooged the machines they use at kings harris birthright and prof nicolaides private harley st clinic, the name escapes me at the moment, can most def allow them to make a good guess at 11/12 weeks. Right for me both times (boys). I have also seen someones 3D scan at 9 wks and you could see beginnings of genitals there as well.

anyway, unless you were scanned at a specialist place OP I doubt they could se enough to convince them of girl.

scrooged · 09/03/2009 21:47

lol! I do remember asking them when I had my 12 week scan, they said they couldn't tell. I work in the same trust now and we are not allowed to tell, even if we could see any 'bits'

xfabba · 09/03/2009 21:50

i was told boy at 11 and 12 weeks when I asked and each time they qualified it beforhand, don't take this as definite, I'm not putting it in writing etc, but once i reassured them we didnt care, wouldn't hold them too it etc they both (2 different sonographers) said "this is definitely a boy"

Ewe · 09/03/2009 21:54

I think it is different if you are private - assume you didn't have Prof Nicolaides as a matter of course on the NHS! If you did, lucky lady - when you are paying they will do whatever you want and tend to have much better scanning equip (all 3D at the Portland etc).

scrooged · 09/03/2009 21:55

It depends on alot of different factors, the position of the baby, the ultrasound machine (old ones are grainy so it can be difficult to see), the experience of the sonographer... there's alot to take into account. Don't assume it's a she though, the boy bits may not have been visible.

The NHS don't have the top whack equiptment that the private hospitals have, sad but true.

lockets · 09/03/2009 21:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

xfabba · 09/03/2009 22:01

sorry to harp on but mine were both NHS (Kings and St Thomas') but I know what you mean, local hospital's scanner was way less clear. I guess the top scanners are gradually filtering out.

scrooged · 09/03/2009 22:07

It's OK. There are a load of factors involved. As a rule, where I am training, we are not allowed to say until the pregnancy goes beyond a specific gestation if you know where I am coming from. It's a flat rule and doesn't apply to one culture, it applies to them all.

NotAnOtter · 09/03/2009 22:13

i was asked at 12 weeks if i wanted to know
i did not
i took it to mean it was a boy

20 weeks told sonographer we did not want to know...she was all flustery after she had asked us what we already had (4 boys) rubbish at hiding her emotions

it was a boy (but what a peach!)

twoshakes sorry to digress - i always think it is only boys they 'see' early don't fret it is just a generic term i am sure!

pandagirl03 · 09/03/2009 22:14

when we had a scan they kept saying he, then somtimes she said she. I think its so they dont refer to the baby as it because we had a dd.

xfabba · 09/03/2009 22:16

5 boys! respect!

(I am hoping for 3)

NotAnOtter · 09/03/2009 22:23

xfabba thanks!! boys are a doddle it's the daughter keeps us awake at night

lockets · 09/03/2009 22:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

babypringle · 10/03/2009 08:25

We were told girl by the consultant at our nuchal fold scan, then boy at the 20 week scan. Because of the confusion we arranged a private gender scan, and so now it is 2-1 likely that its a boy. But we will find out for sure in 4 weeks!!

Nekabu · 10/03/2009 09:23

Maybe she's a mumsnetter? The pregnancy stage stuff on here all refers to the baby as 'she' because they say they don't want to call it 'it' or the 'embryo/foetus'. I'd say she was just calling it 'she' to avoid calling it 'it' as some people get the hump at their baby being referred to that way. The sonographer couldn't tell the sex of my baby at 12 weeks and she had a good old try.

DaisyMaisyMoo · 10/03/2009 10:59

scrooged - I think it must vary from trust to trust, when I had DD the hospital that I had my 20 week scan at had a blanket policy that they would not tell you the sex at all.

iwontbite · 10/03/2009 11:04

but scrooged, if you're implying that they won;t tell at the 12 week scan in case people choose to terminate, well... they could do that after a 20 week scan too!

the only way to stop that happening would be to have a 25 week scan surely?

aaaaaanyway, to the OP... I am sure the sonographer was just saying "she" as a generic term. my midwife always refers to my babies as "he" despite neither of us knowing

AitchTwoOh · 10/03/2009 11:11

the sonographer at dd2's 13-ish week scan said she was pretty sure she was a girl.

to the OP, this fact did not prevent other sonographers referring to dd as he, she and it.

of course, there's a 50% chance that they'll be right, so all this reassurance might count for nought when it turns out to be a girl anyway.

Mintyy · 10/03/2009 11:17

Our sonographer, who I'm fairly sure was Spanish, referred to our baby as "she" at the 20 week scan, and we hadn't wanted to know the sex either.

Along came a lovely 8lb 15oz boy 20 weeks later!

In many languages "baby" is a feminine word so gets the she/her handle.

Could this be the case with you?

Original poster

twoshakes · 10/03/2009 12:19

Thanks everyone. Yes what you say is a possibility Mintyy. But ATO, you're completely right. I guess I'll never know whether the sonographer knew or whether she was just using a generic term. I'm just going to forget about it and carry on looking forward to our lovely surprise when the baby turns up!

OP posts:

prettysunset · 08/07/2010 11:17

I'm a Sonographer and scanned myself constantly (naughty!!) to find out my daughters sex- I was CONVINCED she was a boy until 16 weeks! You can tell the sex based on the angle of the genital tubercle but really only private centres offer it. Some little boys are obvious as early as 12 weeks but I always tell my ladies to take it with a pinch of salt until confirmed at 20w!
It was just a slip of the tongue I'm sure or just the Sonographers 'patter' to say 'she'. Xx

nunnie · 08/07/2010 11:33

For my 12 week scan the sonographer referred to the baby as a she, so did the two midwifes I saw, even at 6 weeks.
My 20 week scan showed a boy I saw willy and everything very clear. The midwife still refers to baby as a she. Think they prefer to pick one sex here and refer to it as that rather than it.
I wouldn't read too much into it myself.

Flip

1 2 3

Swipe left for the next trending thread