Expecting No4, feeling down, please come and cheer me up

[HeinzSight]

am 8 weeks, still in complete shock really.

DS1 is 12, DS2 9 and DD is 15 months.

She'll be nearly 2 when No.4 arrives.

I do remember feeling down at this stage with DD, like I couldn't think of one good reason to be having a baby.

I'm petrified of PND, have had it after all 3 pregnancies, getting worse after each one, felt suicidal after DD

DH has a paralysed arm so is unable to give all the practical support he did with my DSs.

Am so scared scared scared.

Come and hold my hand, cheer me up, give me positive thoughts.

Keep trying to snap myself out of it, but struggling.

Heinzsight just wanted to add my support too. I am really sorry to hear you are suffering with AND - I know how awful it is. I am 9 weeks pregnant with number 3 (planned following a miscarriage) but I also lie awake at night thinking what have we done! I suffered AND with dd2 and PND with both DDs which lasted until they were each 18months. My AND only lasted until 13 weeks so I hope that yours will stop soon. I tried NHS counselling which did not help me. But I did find a really lovely counsellor through the NCT (in London though) who turned things around for me both times. It did cost me but it was worth it. I mention this in case you don't feel that the person you are speaking to is helping - it is worth trying someonelse.

I am hoping that exercise might help this time. Before my last pregnancy I was running regularly and really enjoyed it - the GP told me I could continue during the pregnancy but that pregnancy ended in miscarriage at 10 weeks. Whilst everyone says this won't have been the cause I stopped when I found out I was pregnant this time and wonder when to restart. I have had an early scan which was ok - Are any of you runners with any advice?

Fingers x'd that we don't suffer PND again this time.

If your body is used to running then I think its ok. Just be careful getting out of breath and always bring water with you. Maybe do shorter distances.However since you miscaaried it might be better to wait until 12 weeks.
I also agree that it may take a couple of counsellors to get the one that is right for you. I had to pay for mine but it was worth every penny and it has helped me through many difficulites even after finishing.

Hi heinz, I was an Oct 07 poster, so saw you on that thread when you announced your pregnancy. I have 3 dcs- 9,7 and 1, and so could have some inkling as to how I might feel if there was a no 4 on the way. I also had pnd with no. 2 and dreaded dc3, but actually didn't have any with him- so all i wanted to say was hang in there and i hope things get better for you.

thank you for your posts everyone, sorry I haven't posted for a day or so.

I bought some Mumomega from Boots today, it says you can take up to 3 per day, not sure whether it's helping already but I do feel a bit lighter in mood. I started taking some Tesco Omega 3 on Friday but read here that it could be risky, hence the Mumomega.

Am totally up for counselling, but agree that I'd need to find one that suits me, I'm v pro cognitive behaviour therapy as opposed to just conventional counselling.

I used several techniques when I was suffering with PND, positive mental images, positive words/mantras etc. I mentioned some of them here on a thread I started when I was bad after having DD. Feels surreal reading through it.

I kept pretty busy today which helped with the feelings of abandonment! Sad that boys have gone back to school and Dh back at work.

Busy was good. Very tired now though !

I've just realised NAB you were one of the first people to post on that thread, thank you x

Hiya Heinzsight, Hope u r are having a good day today. Hows it going with the omega 3? I went for my scan today and my due date should be 18th August, so I am now 8+1.

Keep in touch.

KKQ x

Hi...just new to this thread.
Congrats on pregnancy...understand how you feel re:PND. I had it too and fortunately my husband took a little time off to help which did me wonders i must admit.
I'm a doula now and have looked in to PND and it's such a hard one to figure. Many times people would say "cheer up you have nothing to be sad about" but if only it were that simple...i ended up seeing a kinesiologist. She said hormones unbalanced are bound to make you feel like that and obviously different women have different extremities but without sorting the hormones out i wouldn't feel better....so i saw her and it was the best thing i ever did. I know not everything suits everyone but there are lots of things out there which may help...keep your chin up!

Hi, thanks for asking kitkatqueen, looks like your due date is just a few days apart from mine! I'm pretty sure it's the Omega 3, I'm feeling TONNES better, haven't felt down at all since I've been taking it! Amazing. Long may it last!!

samshepp, that's interesting about you seeing a kinesiologist, will have to look that up.

Omega 3 really is amazing stuff. Did you try it at all in yr previous pregnacies?

KKQ x

Hello heinz, glad you are feeling loads better - hadn't really though about the omega 3 thing - although dp bought me loads of pregnacare tablets with omega 3 in which I have been taking forEVER (or so it seems), so I guess I'm lucky.

Keep us posted how you're doing - a summer baby should be lovely

snm x

Hi kitkatqueen, sorry I haven't posted here for a few days. I didn't try omega 3 in previous pregnancies, wish I had!

I didn't take any yesterday and I started to feel quite down again today. It surely must be the Omega 3 which is helping

Thanks for your message too sausagenmash, yes, you're right, a Summer baby will be lovely

Keep taking it!!LOL It does have an uplifting effect very quickly - I would love to make a bet that you are fine this time!! I know so many people who have benefitted from it. Keeping my fingers crossed for you!
KKQ x

Thank you SO much KKQ , am keeping everything crossed, even my eyes! x

LOL!!!!Its not my eyes I should have kept crossed!!

Am starting to be lots more positive now - just think of those cute little outfits!!

Also I just found out a good friend who was jaw dropping at my pregnancy has just found out she's preggers too. Too funny for words!! She too is on the omega 3! So hopefully we will all be happy campers!!

Try not to walk into anything!!!

KKQ x