DH thinks I am laying it on thick when I say I am tired at 37 weeks- help!

[Minkus]

DH isn't being mean or spiteful I just don't think he believes me when I say I am tired about this time every night. ("But it's only at the start women are supposed to feel tired" "You weren't knackered all the time when pg with ds")

In fact, why AM I tired? DS goes to nursery at least 3x per week and I'm just at home doing housework and trying to get things ready for the baby, I drop off/pick up ds from nursery which is a 30 mile round trip each time and do bedtime/cook dinner and clear up etc but that's not exactly a big chunk out of my day!

Is it normal to feel so tired and ready for sleep? Or is DH right and I'm just a bit of a whingepot?

You're doing all of that with another human wedged in your pelvis. That will take it out of a person.

Go on strike for the weekend.

How dare he, of course your entitled to be tired.

You are not being a whinge pot! When I was 37 weeks pg I could barely load the dishwasher, I was that big and tired! You are doing quite a lot and never underestimate how tired driving can actually make you and you do have quite a big round trip!!

I find thinking what to do for dinner every day mentally draining and then there is actually cooking it and I'm not even pg!!

Tell your DH to come over here...........

Oi!!! SHES TIRED! LET HER GET ON WITH IT!!!

[grins]

I'm 32 weeks and have been tired all day everyday throughout my pregnancy! Put it down to age (I'm 41) and fact that I have a 17 month old to look after.

DH hears what Im saying and tries to be supportive but I dont think he understands how bad it can be!

By that stage in my 3rd pg I made dh come back from work early every day to pick the dc up from school and do the teatime/bedtime shift. So that I could lie on the bed snoozing and staring into space. And because I had The Rage and really couldn't safely be left alone with them.

When pg with your first, you don't have a toddler to look after. QED. As an elderly nun once said to me: "He's a man. What does he know?"

Keep 'em rolling ladies I will be showing him this in a minute

god Minkus, I was shattered at 37 weekswithout even having anyone else to look after! Give your dh an extra 17kgs or whatever it is the reckon you gain (baby + placenta + fluid etc), get him to lug that around all day and see how he feels.

Is it worth making sure you're not anaemic. Even if not, 37 weeks with number 2? Knackering. I feel less tired now with a 9 week old than I did in those last few weeks of pregnancy. Chin up. They can never know what it's like no matter how much you try to explain.

As Rachel once said in 'Friends' - no uterus,no opinion.....

Good thing he isn't married to him.

I'd have ripped him another head.

Have you got a large backpack? If so fill it with bricks and get your DH to carry it round for a few hours to see what it's actually like.

I've pointed out to DH several times that this time round I have a small person to look after as well as a baby and I'm nutritionally supporting both of them (DD is still breastfeeding).

Plus I'm pushing double my normal blood volume round my body which means that at rest my body is doing the equivalent of walking up a steep hill. (Oh and that chair is too fucking low for it not to be like Everest to get out of btw).

Minkus - he may be of the 'if I encourage her to whinge, she'll do it all the more' school of thought. DH was like this. I find physical punishment is very effective in retraining small male brains in these cases .

Remember, he's a bloke, he wants to solve the problem. You just want him to say 'oh dear, here's a cup of tea and a biscuit'. Might be easier to just tell him to make you a cuppa and then sod off to the pub for a few hours so you get some peace and quiet.

smellyeli I'm def not anaemic, bloods checked fairly recently for something else and they did that at the same time. BUt not getting great sleep I admit what with wee breaks cramp breaks turning over to huff and puff breaks

Oh my lord! You have another person sucking the very lifeblood out of you fgs! You are not a whingepot at all - being very, very pregnant is exhausting. He ought to try it!

Hey minkus being 37 weeks myself and having a 3 and 2 yo to look after all day, I'm beyond tired I'm catatonic some days.

I walk around in a daze, forget to do the simplest of things (like forget to put the car into first gear when I stop and then sit for 2 mins wondering why I can't go then realise I have stalled it then take another 2 minutes remembering what to do) sometimes I just cry because I'm so tired.

So yes I think it is normal and I don't think a man could ever understand it unless they went through it.

Yes show him this thread as well!

For me the biggest problem was never ever being able to sleep properly. So...

Tie a beachball to his front, and attach something uncomfortable to his back cos he can't lie on that either.

Force feed him 10 pints of water so he needs the loo every 10 minutes.

Research causes of Acid indigestion, cramps, Backache etc and administer as appropriate.

Tie bandages VERY tightly around his chest to share experience of being unable to breathe properly.

Rig-up some sort of machine to mimic kicks in stomach at regular intervals through night.

Tie on weights to be worn at all times.

Alternatively, tell him to stop being an arse, go make you a cup of tea and then give you a foot massage.

You're 37 weeks!!!! Come on Mr Minkus show some pity!

x

Im 39 weeks 2day and finally cracked and cried and screamed into my pillow im so exhausted! Ds1 is 18 months he was having a moany day and dp was sitting quietly reading a magazine before he had to leave for work! I cant play as have sore sore spd! Just lost it at the idea i was trying to do everything whilst he sat on his backside. He soon got the jist though and took ds out for half an hour! Men dont get it even if you explain it the simplest way you know how. I felt alot better after but still tired and drained.

Hey SK didn't want to whinge on the July thread, seems we are all in quite nice places for the mo! Didn't want to ruin the karma

God...........i was out walking the dog and going to the gym right up to my last week (41 weeks)
But I tell you what, i remember that everything took me three times as long because
I
WAS
KNACKERED
ALL
THE
TIME.
Hey, Mr Minkus....yu're tired at then beginning because you're growing a placenta v quickly, and you're tired at the end because you're lugging extra weight around with a diminished lung capacity and ligaments like melted elastic bands.
So THERE.

When I was pg I used to say that it wasn't a tiredness like you get when you are TIRED, rather that it felt like my batteries had been taken out.
There is nothing like the tiredness of pregnancy, sleep doesn't seem to cure it, its all your energy being sapped by the baby you are growing.

With ds2 I was 43, had a 16m old, went back to work full time between babies, and basically DP only ever saw me horizontal and asleep from the minute i got home each evening and all weekend!

I think you are doing really well to be posting at almost 10pm - you are obviously still awake!

DH has been doing my job today- he took the day off to look after DC's as I've had an awful tummy bug on top of still being sick anyway at 20 weeks.

He has been asleep on the bed since the children went to bed at 7:30! I don't think he'll be asking why I'm tired at 10 o'clock anymore!

ps. I can't sleep now because I've slept so much today.

My osteopath told me that when he was studying to be an osteo; his lecturer made all the men in the class strap large fake (heavy) boobs on for the day and fake bumps which weighed a good 3.5kgs and had them try to do a "normal" day. The idea being of course, that they would better understand back and joint problems in pregnancy

He said all the men were shattered by midday and couldn't believe how women managed to be pregnant at all.

Ask your DH to wear a large bag of potatoes strapped to his belly and see how he gets on. Cheeky bugger!

Of course you are entitled to be tired.

By 37 weeks I could barely get to lunchtime with my eyes open, and I would sleep for 3/4 hours every afternoon.

I'm 24 weeks and am spending 12 hours in be every night, and have been throughout the pregnancy!

Because I've accepted my tiredness, this pregnancy has been going better then my first two.

Normal to feel so tired.