40 years old and just discovered I am pregnant today for the first time

[OneKookyRedFox]

Ok deep breaths……I’m 40 and have just found out I am pregnant today. I have never been pregnant before and have quite a complicated gynae history - ovarian torsion/laparotomy and oophrectomy at 18. Lletz procedure mid 20’s….awful break up with long term partner 3 years ago who I thought was going to be “the one” .I guess children was something I thought would never happen.

I’ve had peri menopause symptoms for months and the last few weeks they have really ramped up. Awful palpitations, waking up every night 1am til 5am and my period which is normally pretty regular was a few days late (normally 23/24 day cycle, today is day 29)

I thought it was worsening peri symptoms and something in me made me go out and by a test……I’ve done a clear blue early detection test and very much positive.

My partner and I were not actively trying, but at the same time I haven’t been on birth control and we’ve been using the old pull out method which has worked thus far in our 2.5 year relationship but I know in my own heart I always wanted the opportunity to become a mum…..

He doesn’t know yet. He’s a divorced dad with an 8 year old who he has 50% of the time and absolutely dotes on but I know finds it all quite stressful. I really hope he’s going to be okay when I tell him.

Today doesn’t even feel real. What do I need to do? Get some folic acid? Book a gp appointment? Re test again soon? Obviously this is all very early days and anything can happen. My heads a shed!!!

Congratulations!
You don't necessarily need to see GP, you can self refer to the midwives and they'll arrange a booking in appointment with you - mine was done over the phone then had an in person appointment at around 10 weeks.

The double strength folic acid thing is no longer a recommendation. It was for DD1 4 years ago due to my BMI but this time midwife has said that the standard dose is suitable across the board. Obviously taking more wont do harm (I was taking preg vits and additional folic acid separately).

If its a much wanted and dreamed of baby that you thought you'd never have, then many many congratulations! Its amazing news.

Made me cry a little actually xx

Congratulations op, it will take a while to sink in, perhaps the whole pregnancy, I certainly still didn’t quite believe I was pregnant even with the growing bump 😂.

I became a mum to my twins at 42 and I love being an older mother. I’m also a single parent and although it can be hard at times it’s also absolutely fine and we have a lovely little life. so just take some time to let it sink in and don’t worry too much about the future, no matter what happens you will get there.

Congratulations!!! You can take vitamins for pregnancy like Proceive, Pregnacare etc. Check NHS website what foods you should avoid - it’ll be certain cheese, cold meats, pate, limited amounts of tuna and salmon, limited amount of caffeine etc. Good luck!! 🍀

Congratulations, look after yourself and rest. Had mine at 40 and it worked out great.

Congratulations from another older mum!!

RE folic acid you might want to look into taking it in the natural folate form rather than the usual synthetic folic acid kind. Many high quality prenatals include it but you can also buy it separately. Quite a lot of women unknowingly have a gene mutation which means they can’t process the synthetic one so it’s a good way of covering all bases to minimise risk even if you don’t do a higher dose.

Congratulations! If he isn't happy about the pregnancy he can be reminded that he chose not to use contraception at any point!

Congratulations! I had DS2 at 41, just took Pregnacare. This was 10 years ago though so guidance may have changed.
No special treatment, he was delivered via elective section at 39 weeks and is a happy healthy almost 10 year old.
Ive never really felt like an old mum, I look young for my age plus there are a lot of 40-something mums round here (SW London).
Very best of luck with it all xx

This was so meant to be!

Congratulations!

That’s amazing congratulations.

Congratulations!
However, from the opposite POV...
Please look after yourself after the baby's born - my mother was 40, I was her first and only and she died when I was 22. I know I was an adult, but I miss her very much.

Congratulations and yes to the folic acid!!

Lovely news 😍 congratulations. Take some time before you tell your partner if you like. Enjoy your little bubble and let it fully sink in. Then like others have said - remember he might also need some processing time. He will come round and tbh even if he doesn’t still grab your chance at motherhood!

Please read about the difference between folic acid and folate. It’s the latter you want. Many women can’t process folic acid properly, folate is the more biologically available kind. You also want vitamin D3 (not just D).
A good qualify pregnancy multivitamin would be recommended if you can take one (can be hard to swallow as pregnancy progress if you get nausea!) recommend Garden for Life x

Congratulations, lovely news .
I hope all goes well for you.

Aw congratulations:) also 40, also pregnant (first viable pregnancy and a long history of ivf). I also have a history of lletz. This is something to let your caregiver know as you’ll be under surveillance to make sure alls well with your cervix. But one step at a time! (That’s not till later). Folic acid yes! And let your local maternity unit/gp know.

Listen to those PP recommending folate over folic acid. I'm taking Wild Nutrition supplements and will be 40 on my due date. Solidarity OP, we've got this 😁

Congratulations

I agree with others don’t tell anyone yet just give yourself time let this sink in . It is a very special secret and time for you and your baby for you to come to terms with the news and process how you feel. Once you are ready then share no hurry. Huge congratulations xx

Congratulations OP.

Only thing I’d recommend to look into would be an NIPT test if you can afford it. You can do from 9-10 weeks so then you’d know if you are at risk for any of the 3 major chromosomal abnormalities going into the 12 week scan already.

At your age (mine too) the risk is elevated anyway - I think roughly 1/100 for Downs - so it’s good to know. If the (very flawed) combined test taken from 12 week scan data shows as high risk (fairly likely at 40) the NHS would offer an NIPT anyway, but obviously that means taking it post combined results and then being more like 13-14 weeks to get results. Personally I chose to take the better test earlier and that’s one less thing to worry about going into the 12 week scan.

Congratulations xxx
I would book a private scan and NIPT at 11 weeks.

Folate is less of an issue now because by law (as of this month) white flour (including in baked items) now has to be fortified with it. So British women are actually eating a lot more folate in their normal diet.

Not sure why you quoted me here. It’s a different issue … flour is fortified with synthetic folic acid which doesn’t help women with MTHFR mutation

Agree with @peanutbuttertoasty Women with heterozygous or homozygous MTHFR mutation (some studies suggest the majority of the population) cannot process folic acid into useful folate so the synthetic acid form builds up in the body and can cause its own issues.

Vitamin D alongside folic acid is usually advised during pregnancy

Congratulations. Wishing you all the best