Baby Shower Present Lists..what would you expect?

[MissMontana]

I have been given in invite to a baby shower and with it a list of items the mum wants, where theyre from and how much..ok fine..but my first problem is....i dont know this mum very well, i look after her daughter, we are friendly and ask how shes progressing etc etc, but not social together..altough, nice thought to invite me...now second problem is this list ranges in price from £40 to £400!!! and im required to ring a family member to discuss what i am buying, now las problem..it then tells me at the top of the list/letter that any presents or vouchers "must be acompanied by pampers"!!?????????????????????????

am i wrong to be gobsmacked? i didnt have a list but i understand that people do them so you dont get things you dont want/nedd/like, but at this price range and than accompanied my packs of nappies on top???

Oh and as its an all night affair, if people come later on we have to pay to get in!!????

40 Quid? FORTY QUID? Minumum? Plus nappies?

Why go? Surely just an excuse for her to sit about at the centre of things being given expensive tat gifts. Bleurgh. Hate hate hate these things.

FFS

DISGUSTING I tells you. Consumerism gone mad.

at Mothercare rejects. We had some nasty acrylic cardigans given to DS but would never have returned or refused them - they just went quietly into the charity shop pile.

If she's not that close a friend, I would mention nicely that you can't come because the present list is beyond your budget at the moment. I'm sure other people feel exactly the same as you, and it would give her a (much needed) prod. £40 minimum is utterly outrageous!

CRAZY!!!

I couldnt spend £40 plus nappies on my sisters baby that is due in a few months, let alone someone I barely knew.

I would def not go. This would annoy me so much I wouldnt want to go tbh.
Either that or I would go and take the most hideous cheap present I could find and pretend I didnt see/receive the list

I.hate.baby.showers.

They are a tacky, gauche trend from the US that I hope never catches on here, not to mention the crass idea they have there of eternally counting their chickens before they hatch.

It leaves a taste in my mouth that is worse than aspartame or cheap sparkling wine.

And she's on her second child and begging for expensive presents like a tastesless bourgeois.

Ugggh.

I'd decline the invite politely and get her a normal present when teh baby arrives.

Horrifying. I'm American, present lists with £40 minumums ($80!) are definitely not the norm!

Perhaps it's a surprise and this woman doesn't know her relatives are being so grabby. I can't imagine any of the invitees think this is ok.

Second child? Missed that one

And for what it is worth I am an American immigrant.

Who was brought up to believe it is the height of poor taste to inflict one's traditions on another culture.

Rude, greedy and arrogant.

Don't go.

MissMontana I assume you aren't going? I certainly wouldn't.

Well, the OP says she doesn't know the mother well, but that she looks after the mother's daughter.

I am so proud of my first cousin. She is getting married to a lovely Italian man in August and has NO gift list.

We will be giving her a very generous voucher from a shop I know she likes.

I just don't get baby showers. American nonsense. This woman is rude and greedy. Don't go - she sounds horrible and I bet her party is crap - she will probably require £100 for the drinks kitty and a contribution towards her outfit

I'll bet it's in a restaurant where you are expected to pay for your own meal and drinks and pitch in for this arrogant cow's meal as well.

None of my friends has ever had a "baby shower" and I would be aghast if they did. Horrible imported American consumerism that should be left on the other side of the Atlantic.

This woman sounds greedy and tacky, don't go. Buy something for her and the baby WHEN IT'S BORN, far nicer tradition IMO.

My DP organised a surprise party for me,in the pub! My friends all assumed it was an official baby shower (which hadn't even crossed his mind!) and brought presents, which made the surprise even nicer! But none of them were huge and expensive, I think the the costliest was my posh dog-shaped Nightlight which is about £20. I mainly got a lot of booties and little teddies.

I have seen some ridculuous gift lists over the last couple of years though. But I would be more worried about the paying to get in...?!?!?! Where is it being held? You can't demand an entry fee to someone's house for goodness sake!

Hi all, sorry been on school run then getting everyone snacks etc..erm..to answer some questions, hope ive got them all...no, i dont know this lady well i look after her daughter..yes she does know about the shower, she wrote the invites...its in a hall, so not house or resteraunt, so dont understand/cant quite believe charging of a fee?????..think thats it?, will go back through when i get a min..told her daughter tonight that i wont be able to go and we'll buy the baby something nice when its born..she'll pass this onto mum (like the cheeky invitation was passed through her to me as well!)..off to see to children again now, thanks for your replies

i wouldn't go tbh. I don't like being bullied into giving presents, let alone pre-selected ones.

She wrote the invites??? Even in the US where baby showers are traditional, that's considered very bad taste.

Oh wow - I find this pretty shocking. I have no problem with baby showers I am South African and it is a tradition of ours for the friends of the mom to be to host a baby shower but i assure you no demands are made regarding presents, and as for including a gift list that includes items such as highchairs is just so greedy and in very bad taste. Usually we provide the mother to be with basic items such as Avent bottles, bibs, nappies, babygrows .... I agree with most of you I certainly would decline the invitation to the babyshower!

"MUST be accompanied by pampers"

How f-ing obnoxious!

can I also say I think its a little sad and reeks of desperation?

I've had two babies and was absolutely over whelmed by the generosity of everyone, even people I hardly knew (friends/neighbours of my mum and MIL etc) sending lovely stuff

I presumed it was a first born thing but it was the same for dd2 as well

asking for it just implies that they wouldn't get anything otherwise?

in a hall and you have to pay ???
so she is also trying to get you to pay for her having to hire the hall??
that's like paying to attend a wedding or christening.
what sort of person is this woman ?
i'm not actually against baby showers - they can be a lovely event
but this woman is so damn cheeky - i hope no one goes.

well she seems like a lovely woman TBH and this has come as a surprise!
I dont know one person who would ask for such things and even if it was a family member who organised it ( i have to contact a certain member of family 'before' i buy anything!) i dont think I should have had the list put in!..ok if people are that way inclind with their own family, fair enough but not people you barely know!