Should husband go to wedding 4 hours away, 4 days before due date?

[lemonpeanuts]

We have been invited to a wedding which falls 4 days before my due date. The wedding is at least a 4 hour drive away from our home. I'm happy/made peace with the fact that I probably will decline the invitation but am I naive about the idea that my husband could still go?

He is reluctant to but I'm saying it could be possible. Any early signs of labour and he can be on his way back straight away? First time pregnancy so obviously don't know what to expect or know what is realistic.

Any thoughts/advice welcome!

Unless it's a siblings or very best friends wedding then it would be a no from me.
Not all labours are long, labour for DC 2 was 3 hours.
Labour for DC1 my waters broke suddenly before labour started, DH was 2 hours away and I was my myself (was late at night) because it was my first I was a bit scared and wished he'd have been there sooner.
So I think an 8 hour round trip close to your due date is far too far away unless it's a real emergency / very important occasion that he absolutely must attend.
Tbh I think you'd be better off going too - providing its in UK - and packing an hospital bag just in case, at least you'll be with him then.

His brother/sisters wedding - yes.

His mate - absolutely not

close family or best mate of all time - yes
anyone else - absolutely not

and I say this as someone whose DH did attend a wedding just before we had our 1st child.
baby arrived late but the last few weeks were a little stressful with blood pressure going up and worrying about whether baby would need to be induced.

Years later he said (unprompted) that he regretted going and leaving me. As he worried and knowing what he knows now, he wouldn’t recommend it.

the friend was a great school friend but not that close at the time, nor since, so really not worth the effort (and cost) given what we were about to go through!

good luck with the rest of your pregnancy.

he also says that he missed having 1:1 time with me that he didn’t need to miss

I had 3 hour labour on my due date with first baby, and then complications which took a good few hours to sort out. DH would have hated not being there for the birth or rushing back knowing I was very poorly

Just decline. The couple will understand and tbh, it’s preferable to just mark someone down as not attending rather than pay for their meal, wine, canapés etc 6 weeks or so in advance only for them not to attend because of a glaringly obvious foreseeable event.

My first baby was born at 37 weeks, my second at 40+1. With my first, I didn’t even realise I was in labour until I was a few hours before delivery because I couldn’t tell the braxton hicks apart from contractions. With my second, I thought I was going into early labour multiple times, but they were just false starts.

It’s just too uncertain and not fair on the B&G. The only exception IMO is if it’s a sibling/parent and they just go for the ceremony.

No.

You can’t treat due dates as gospel - they’re not even based on the length of your cycle.

My husband is a lorry driver and was at least 3/4 hours away every day until I ended up being induced. Didn’t really think anything of it so I don’t see a problem to be honest but I will definitely be in the minority

DP and I went to a wedding 2 hours away when I was a few days overdue with my first baby. I initially declined, for obvious reasons, but the evening before when there was no sign of baby I messaged her to wish her good luck etc and she said she'd had a couple drop out and there would be meals paid for if we wanted to come. We made the decision the next morning to drive down for a few hours with friends, it was a lovely distraction.

It would be a no from me.

God no, that is way too close.

I hope all goes well for you.