Kissing babies - do you agree with me ?

78 replies

dais23 · 21/05/2025 22:34

Baby is due in a few days, and today I told my mother in law that I do not want her kissing the baby for the first few weeks due to his immune system, and she went off the rails!!

i don’t think I’m being unreasonable for the first few weeks, for reference when I was 3 weeks old my mum & dad had to deal with me having meningitis and sepsis - that must be horrendous for a parent to go through. I feel As if it’s my responsibility to make sure I reduce the risk of my baby catching anything life threatening.

according to her I’m being ‘unreasonable’ because he is part of her. She is not going to come see her first grandchild until she can kiss him 😬
I just can’t believe her main priority is for her to kiss the baby than to keep him safe!

does anyone else agree this is selfish? Or am I being unreasonable 🫠

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

ConcernedOfClapham · 23/05/2025 15:06

“part of her”

fucks sake.

Musicalmistress · 23/05/2025 15:10

Your baby your rules. We have a no kissing newborns rule in my wider friendship group as 13years ago my friend’s wee one died as a result of catching the cold sore virus at only a few days old. I’m not trying to scaremonger but u til then I had no idea really that anything like that could happen

Millie90 · 23/05/2025 19:35

CrazyGoatLady · 21/05/2025 22:59

No kissing on the mouth, obvs. No holding/close contact or kissing if the person is sick or has a cold sore. But a kiss on the cheek or the top of the head, from a healthy adult, is unlikely to do any harm. It is normal for grandparents to want to hug and kiss their grandchildren, FFS. They are not being weird, crossing a boundary of some kind, or trying to kill your child. They want to hug and kiss them because they love them and want to show it. I honestly think some of the kinds of rules I see mums on here imposing on family members are borderline cruel in some cases, and more about power and control than the baby's health.

If you make it massively stressful for people being around you/baby, they won't want to visit or help when you might need it. Consider this carefully before you make your family/in-laws walk on eggshells with endless rules.

Say it louder for people at the back...a child's health is more important than a narcissistic adult's feelings!! Also...if said person can't follow a simple rule like don't kiss the baby, like hell would I allow them to babysit! They're fine to toddle off of they want to. I'll look after my own kid thanks

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