Giving my son a 'girl' name

[Bowa]

I am due soon to give birth soon to my first child who will be a boy. I struggled to think of any boy names that felt right. I had a long list for girl names, but I couldn't think any for if I had a son.

I found out I was having a boy at my 16 weeks scan and I still couldn't find a name that felt right at the time. Kinda like a missing puzzle piece if that makes sense.

A few weeks later, I was thinking about a movie I loved since childhood and one of the main characters (the character is male) and something clicked and I knew that was the name I wanted for my son. It felt perfect and exactly what I was looking for. I became excited and looked into how I could make things with his name for the nursery, nicknames and that.

I haven't told anyone what name I picked out for him as I wanted to get everything ready beforehand. I have also had some 'complications', so it felt like bad luck if I told people his name before he was born. When I'm by myself, I talk to my son and I will use his name then.

I was looking at something and saw the name I picked for my son. It had a few different spellings, but what stuck out was that apparently it's used more as a girl name. It didn't say anything about it being a unisex name. I assumed because the character who had the name was male (and refers to himself as a male) that it was wasn't a girl's name or maybe it could be a unisex name. Even the way it is pronounced sounds more masculine than feminine.

I feel conflicted. I can't think of any other name that feels right for him (he has middle names that are boy names), but I don't want him to be picked on if people knew it was used more for a girl. I have an unusual first name, so I have experiences with people not spelling it correctly or pronouncing it right.

His name isn't common for this area either, so I don't think anyone would assume it is used more as a girl name and the way it is pronounced is easy.

I know people have named their daughter with names that are more boy/unisex sounding like: Blake, Parker, Dylan, Toni etc.

His name isn't like: Daisy, Penelope, Sophia, Jane etc.

Would it be OK to stick with the name even if it's used more for a girl?

Is it Rowan? No-one would bat an eyelid.

If Paris, we had a player in my football club's male youth team called Paris Double-Barrelled Something, and there was no particular comment about that either.

Leslie if male, Lesley if female.

I can’t believe you wrote all that and didn’t provide the name!!!

It’s definitely Julie-Ann 😁

Look @Bowa

At the moment only YOU know what name you would like to give your DS.

At the very least, you need to tell your DP/DH what you are thinking, particularly if the name is a little bit 'out there' - they will probably need time to let the name percolate and hopefully like it.

When naming our 2DC we both had power of veto, if either of us suggested a name the other didn't like then it was dismissed. A name is a big deal and shouldn't solely be made by you if you have a DP/H

Without stating the name, what a stupid thread. 😀

Too much talk. Just call him John, Peter, or James and be done with it. 🙄

Or do what my wife and I did when the first son was born. Consult an alphabetical list of boys’ names. It went like this:

’Aaron’? Naa, too American.

’Adam’?

‘Yeah, that’ll do. What’s for lunch’?

Growing up in Scotland in the 60s and 70s, Lindsay was generally a boys name, then. Now almost universally a girl's name, though with several spellings, so a generational thing.
Islay (pronounced Isla) was also used as a boy's name as well as a girl's in those days.

FFS, why don't you just tell us the name?

My guess is Sharon

I read on here of someone who called their son Wren😂

My kids names are all unisex and more common as girls names in America. Makes no difference. 🤷🏼‍♀️

John Wayne was born with the name Marion Robert Morrison and Big Daddy was called Shirley Crabtree.

Hilary Swank’s first name is not the greatest of his/her nominative issues. 😀

Is there really such a person?

Please be Vyvyan!

cora ?

Yeah. Every Avery I’ve ever met has been a weighing machine.

Still better than calling your child Xerox I suppose. 😀

And Gestetner might be problematic.

Why do people do this? How can we pass opinion when we don't know the name? There is a real difference between girls names so some might be deemed okay and others might not. For example Leslie would be okay but if you wanted to call him Emily I would be saying no. Its practically impossible to answer you without knowing the name

Only if you want your child to be a barometer of the level of misogyny present on their world.

Seriously OP, to get sensible opinions you need to share the name. Otherwise we all have no idea what we’re giving our opinions on.

Obviously there were too many Robins already.

Or maybe the mother saw a wren on the windowsill during the birth. At least the child should be thankful it wasn’t a tit.

My guess is Robin. Always boys when I was growing up, way back in the last century. Not so much now.

She’s an Oscar winning actress.

Of course in Ireland we get loads of males called Patsy and Connie and Florence (those mostly in Cork), and in America there are more women called Michael than I'd have expected. More than one would have surprised me. But it's kinder to give a child a name that won't give bullies something to focus on.

There's a Valery works in a local supermarket. Ex-Russian army, I don't think anyone bullies him over his name. Not more than once. Several males called Gay. A Blaize.

Didn't know that, that's interesting thank you. Growing up in the 80s/90s I only knew it as girls names. I know a handful of Lindseys as adult women but no men. It wasn't until I was older I was aware of Lindsey Buckingham (and Hoyle) and realised it could be a man's name also

I know 3 Robins, two are adult males and one is an 8-year-old boy. I think it's having a come back.

It used to be spelled Robyn for a girl.