Declining antenatal care

[Casuallydresseddeepinconversation]

I've declined midwife appts,I had a call last week to try and change my mind and another today,I feel coerced and bullied,patronised and ignored,I'm 20 weeks today and just want to be left alone, considering not going to my 20 week scan now too, the 13 week one wasn't a pleasant experience either and I feel very anti NHS,tho I don't have funds for complete private care, just feeling very emotional atm

I'm not against all care
Just don't see why all is neccassary that's all
A lot of it is just trying to be extra careful I suppose.
I had to go in every 2 weeks from 30 weeks
Couldn't access public transport and it used to cost me £13 pounds in a taxi each way, they really don't think things through
So of course I want in as much as I thought I needed to

When the placenta attaches low in the uterus, you’ll hear people referring to it as a low-lying placenta. They’re usually spotted on your routine 20-week ultrasound. As the uterus grows upwards, the placenta is likely to move away from the cervix. Your midwife will check for this during an extra scan at 32 weeks.
Placenta praevia – low-lying placenta - NCT

The US has a higher than normal infant and maternal mortality rate for a a developed economy because of the lack of free access to ante-natal care, with women going into labour in emergency rooms with no history/checks to guide their care. Those women would jump at the chance of NHS free at the point of access ante-natal care because it saves lives.

But let me guess if it all goes wrong you will expect the drs to fix it and you will expect them to provide labour care with no insight to potential issues. It's not just about you.

I can see how someone might not want to have a covid vaccine, etc if they are worried about the newness of that. But I fail to see how having BP checks, urine dips, fundal height measurements are risky.

I do understand there is an argument about medicalisation of childbirth, interventions, etc. But none of the above have to lead to an intervention. They've certainly been shown to save lives.

It is out of concern, we're all telling her what the risks are and sharing our experiences and she's sticking her head in the sand and not listening. There's just no telling some people. My baby would have died if I'd have acted like OP.

Fundal height measurements absolutely do lead to intervention. It's a stupidly innacurate way of guessing a babies size that often triggers a growth scan where surprise surprise there is often a reason to induce. Be careful saying that one saves lives.

What are you on about?!! Of course they were! DC2 was born in January 2021 and they most certainly tested my BP and urine. I received the exact same standard of care as with my first pregnancy in 2018. The only difference was face masks, routine covid tests when I was admitted and no partners at appointments.

True. Mine was born middle of 2020. Aside from the antenatal ward being very quiet through lack of partners and children things didn't change that much. Funnily enough looking after babies was considered pretty essential.

So what? Yes there may still be things that are missed, but many, if not most issues can be picked up with antenatal care.

Why do you have so little concern for the health of you and your unborn baby?

So it all came down to money for you then?

I am guessing the OP doesn't use a seatbelt or car seats for her kids either because hey you can still die in a car accident so what's the point?

Despair that she is adding to the gene pool

It's to pick up interuterine growth restriction (IUGR), where the placenta isn't working properly. It can lead to stillbirth so this is the reason for intervention.

Christ sake.
I had placental insufficiency and IUGR
Fundal height was totally normal
My midwife told me it's useless measuring that way
Some trusts don't do it at all anymore
Do your research

Growth scans can pick up that a baby is massive and therefore induce or have a c section early. Shoulder dystocia kills babies so a scan really can save lives.

Growth scans yes. Fundal height no.
Growth scans are in any case up to 20% innacurate
It's not as simple as you suggest

Growth scans are notoriously inaccurate.

Anyway - I hope the OP takes something from the more empathic responses on the thread and can take some space to think things through. I don’t think arguing with strangers on the internet will be conducive to her wellbeing.

I had it and they picked it up with fundal measurement, that lead to extra scans where they found the baby was small for gestational age. I know it's not very accurate but it's better than nothing.

Well yeah I know they are as mine was meant to be average weight but came nearly 9lb and shoulder dystocia but it is still better to have them.

I think OP's mind is set to be fair and her comment about vaccines sums it up for me. She is one of those people and we are wasting our time.

if the NHS advise it then who are you to say they are wrong? They don’t give out staff time unless it is important.

What about the blood and urine tests they do? I know that signs of infection can be picked up early in urine tests as they can be very dangerous for the baby. Blood tests can pick up low iron levels. You would never forgive yourself if there was something that they could have picked up on!

I also know people who’ve had the opposite experience and had unnecessary and traumatic medical interventions due to the babies supposed large size, which turned out not to be the case.

There is nuance here, it’s not a one size fits all situation.

So much rigidity and self righteousness on the thread.

I see your point, but the NHS - as an organisation - are not beyond reproach and can be wrong. It is important that people know their rights and feel able to speak up, question and challenge at times rather than go along with things (if they are feeling uncomfortable). There is a lot of defensive practice in the NHS unfortunately which does not help people like the OP. The ‘evidence base’ varies from Trust to Trust too, and it’s often a postcode lottery. It is important that people are able to advocate for themselves and do independent research - across the board, not just maternity care.

I say this as a senior NHS clinician and manager.

The OP has no interest in listening to the advice or warnings and has shown time and time again with assumptions about pregnancy related issues.

They have also been warned about safe guarding, child protection orders and social services.
None of it has gone in as she clearly knows best and doesn't think this decision will cause any issues.

We can all wait for the social services aren't being fair thread in a year's time!

OP, it seems there are two reasons why you want to decline antenatal care. The first being how you were treated at the appointments you did attend, and the second that even with full antenatal care, problems could still be missed.

I think people are reacting the way they are because you haven't explained what was so problematic about the way you were treated at your appointments, other than to say that you matter too. This leads people to think you're being precious, as most of us can't imagine what part of early antenatal appointments could be so invasive/ coercive/ unpleasant.

As for your argument that problems still get missed with full antenatal care, surely this is not a reason to decline antenatal care? That's akin to saying that people still die in car crashes even when they are wearing seatbelts, so what's the point of wearing one? I think one of the reasons you're not getting the responses you want is that most people can understand that having antenatal care that might not be perfect is still a lot safer than not having antenatal care at all.

Whilst I agree you don't owe the midwives anything, they are probably very concerned about you, precisely because they have a much better idea of the things that can wrong even with good care than you do, and of the reality and horrors when things go pear shaped. They're not on some power trip trying to coerce you. If nothing else, they don't have the time for it🤷🏼‍♀️