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1002 replies

Takenoprisoners · 23/04/2008 16:48

Following Ms Dynamo's wonderful news of her pregnancy and all the rest of us who are coming out of the woodwork ...a new, morale-boosting thread for those of us in our 40s currently going through pregnancy.

Come on, sign up: we are 40+ and FABULOUSLY PREGNANT!!!

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
lexysmith · 03/05/2008 07:20

Ooooooooo I am glad I looked at this thread.
Am 40 and 18 weeks gone, due around 1st October. Have a 4 year old and a surprised husband. Talk about one shot wonder......

All going on ok although currently having bit if a scare about slapped cheek disease - is rife at daughters pre-school so bit scared about the implications of that...

Otherwise just glad to have found SOOOO many delicious older mums to reassure me that I won't be the only one that gets curious looks in the playground!

msdynamo · 03/05/2008 07:40

Morning all. Welcome lexysmith Had an early scan yesterday, as I couldn't wait for week 12. It was amazing to hear the little peanut's heartbeat, bought a tear to my eye. Well worth every penny!

Added myself to list too:
Didoreth - 30th April
Wahwha - 15 May
Shulli - ClOSE!
Christie1 - May 29
jeanjeannie- 30 May
Jules43 - 15 June
takenoprisoners - 4 July
Disneystar - 17July
Jackie77 - 17 July
Kaz196 - 18 July
Fortified - 12 August
johnworf - 15 Sept
iapanemagirl - 16 sept
LouiseAnn - 23 Sept
Hedgepig - 4 Oct
Babycakes - 4 Oct
mrsjupiter - 7 Oct
Rosa - 11 Nov
Pwcbird - 1 Dec
msdynamo -24 December

Because baby brain is so bad I accidentally posted this message first on a thread about induction.

johnworf · 03/05/2008 07:44

LOL@msdynamo and her baby brain! I spent half an hour looking for milk y'day only to find it ...in the FRIDGE of all places

johnworf · 03/05/2008 07:46

msdynamo did it bring a tear to your eye? Mine did at 7 weeks, and again at 12 and another at 16.....I'm just a big softy

I said to the sonographer 'isn't it beautiful'? and he just looked at me like yeah, whatever. I did say I bet you're so used to looking at scans all day it's just a job isn't it? And he nodded with a smile.

And there's me lying flat on my back blubbing to DH...it's a baby...it's a baby! Like it was a surprise or something

Takenoprisoners · 03/05/2008 08:43

Pwcbird: Glad you've got the same dilemma as me! I probably will go for the Twin Two Jane tank, unless somone pops up with a comparable suggestion. I guess it depends how much walking you will need to do with baby and DS. You could opt for a sling/baby carrier + single buggy for DS and then maybe go for a buggy board when the baby gets a bit heavier and you want to use the buggy. But I'm thinking to go for a tandem for at least a year, and then revise it next summer depending on how much DS2 is still using it. I don't think there's a lot of choice for the tandems, really - those Jane ones seem to be the market leaders, unless I'm missing something. There seems to be more choice with doubles - lots of different makes which look quite manoeuvrable, but I don't want one of them as I think the seats are too narrow, so okay for small babies but not bigger toddlers, which is why I think I'll go for the Twin Two - it's the widest tandem I've seen. I'm glad I directly compared it with the Powertwin. I was concerned the Powertwin wouldn't give DS2 enough room in the front and that his legs would get in the way of the wheel - the bloke told me it was "exactly the same amount of room" as the Twin Two model, but didn't have one to show me. When I popped in the other week, they had the two models so I could compare them side by side and there's a huge difference in width (although, interestingly, the Twin Two is slightly lighter than the Powertwin), so if plenty of room is an issue for your DS then you'll want to look at that. Let me know if you find any other good alternatives yourself while you're looking!

All this talk of inductions and placentas got me trawling the net for information ... always a dangerous thing ... and I couldn't find any specific stats about placental decline and age. I think your view, Didoreth, makes a lot of sense. Healthy baby, lots of kicks and movements, no reason to assume placenta not doing its job. And we'd all probably be screaming for an induction if we get to post 12 days or more, regardless of age. Good luck Didoreth - we're rooting for you!

But, I think the main thing is, if you are booked in for an induction or section at whatever stage, and are happy with it, then that's the main thing. It's the mother's confidence in whatever procedure she's opting for that's the crucial factor - if you're happy with your plan and have confidence in your team, that's all that matters. But if you aren't sure why you're booked in for something and it's worrying you ... get them to give you the answers.

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Takenoprisoners · 03/05/2008 08:45

How lovely, MsDynamo - that's great news and so reassuring for you now you've heard the heartbeat.

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Takenoprisoners · 03/05/2008 08:48

Just a note ... I think Shulli is 33 weeks ... and so will be somewhere in the middle of July?

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johnworf · 03/05/2008 08:49

I'd let them chop my legs off if I got to 40 +12

Takenoprisoners · 03/05/2008 08:52

Truly a nightmare ... doesn't bear thinking about ... ... I'm only 31 wks, v uncomfortable now and at this rate, think I might be booking myself in for one v soon.

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jeanjeannie · 03/05/2008 12:17

Good Luck didoreth keep thinking positive (and young!) thoughts. Gosh you must be uncomfy....OOOoo the thought of being overdue..UGH! 35 weeks is draining me...and I've only got till 39 to go...and I just can't see me getting out of bed by then

What nice news msdynamo so pleased for you.

Hi Lexysmith - have added you to the list. Oooo I wonder when we'll be starting our 'Congrats' list?!

Didoreth - 30th April
Wahwha - 15 May
Shulli - ClOSE!
Christie1 - May 29
jeanjeannie- 30 May
Jules43 - 15 June
takenoprisoners - 4 July
Disneystar - 17July
Jackie77 - 17 July
Kaz196 - 18 July
Fortified - 12 August
johnworf - 15 Sept
iapanemagirl - 16 sept
LouiseAnn - 23 Sept
Lexysmith - 1 Oct
Hedgepig - 4 Oct
Babycakes - 4 Oct
mrsjupiter - 7 Oct
Rosa - 11 Nov
Pwcbird - 1 Dec
msdynamo -24 December

johnworf read article with interest. I love the idea that us older mum's have left it late because of our careers......I just couldn't find a decent bloke, I loved and trusted to have children with! Took me till I was 39...and the intervention of the internet (that's another story!) to find him!

pwcbird · 03/05/2008 12:32

jeanjeannie - we should start another thread. I was almost 35 before meeting my DH via the internet. Although I had a career, it would never have stopped me having children if I'd found Mr Right. Saying that though - I think there is something positive to be said about having your children later as you don't feel the need to suddenly rush and be Ms Career afterwards if you don't want to as you've been there and done it already. Sometimes I think it's worse for women who have their children at 28 or 30 because they still feel they have to 'prove' themselves career-wise. I worked 15 years in Glittering London Town in my high heels and pencil skirts before meeting DH and having a baby. I love being at home in my stretchy jeans and flat shoes and having coffee with my other mum chums. Maybe it's just me.

didoreth · 03/05/2008 12:57

I've got a hunch that the fact that women are less likely to stay in unsatisfactory marriages/relationships these days has at least as big an impact on the number of births to 40somethings as career issues, if not more. I'm pregnant now because, having ended a long term relationship and becoming single again in my early 40's, I met a wonderful man and wanted to have his child. Career and finance wise its not at all a good time for me, but relationship wise its perfect.

johnworf · 03/05/2008 13:33

OMG...I found my DH on the t'interweb too. Actually I don't tell many people how we met to avoid the look of disdain that I actually met a 'weirdo off the net'. If they ask I usually mumble something

We've been together 2 years and celebrate our first wedding anniversary in July!

Didoreth same here relationship wise, hence the huge gap between my last child and this one.

I must say it is like having my first baby all over again and I'm really sooo excited. Plus I found my soulmate to have it with

Kaz1967 · 03/05/2008 14:03

Re reasons for inducing labour in older women this is all I can find

"It is generally agreed that the pregnancy should not be allowed to go further than 40 completed weeks because of the worry about higher stillbirth rates and placental insufficiency, the evidence for this, however is not robust."

Reading the NICE guidelines on Management of Pregnancy after 41 weeks which says

"Women with uncomplicated pregnancies should be offered induction of labour beyond 41 weeks."

I suspect they are thinking that us who are older than 40 are more likely to have problems relating to our pregnancy. Most of us will not.

The NICE guidelines do not mention at all women over 40 years of age

On a personal level I suspect by 41 weeks I would have had enough and will be happy to be induced which is probably why induction at that stage has never worried me. If is was much earlier then not sure how happy I was unless the consultant could put the research in front of me.

Takenoprisoners · 03/05/2008 14:15

Pwcbird: I'd def. go for a Maclaren light buggy for your holiday - they're so easy to fold up quickly and sling over your shoulder. We bought a middle-priced, lightweight Mac for DS1 and it's still going strong 5 years later. Best thing, if you're juggling DS in airports etc.

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pwcbird · 03/05/2008 14:24

Takenoprisoners I just weighed DS this morning and he's 2st 1lb (OMG) which is approx 13kg in new money. Everyone seems to be saying don't worry about the weight but DH says he doesn't want to spend £100 to find it's useless in 6 months etc etc. The only one I found that was ok above 15kg was the M&P Aria but it doesn't umbrella fold which I'd like. Trying to make a decision when pregnant is completey impossible.

On a different note - DH ate a fried egg this morning and the yolk was all lovely and runny in the toast. Doest anyone else miss runny eggs? Boiled eggs and soldiers dunked? Poached eggs on toast with the white all firm but the yolk perfect and soft. I've still got months to go and I'm hallucinating almost over them!

Kaz1967 · 03/05/2008 14:53

pwcbird Not missing dippy eggs at all cos still eating them. We were originally told not to eat them because of the risk of salmonella but as most chickens are now vaccinated why if I buy the ones with the lions on should I not eat something I love?

msdynamo · 03/05/2008 17:12

About late motherhood, it's true for me too, that despite having a career, it was finding a decent partner that took me all this time. I had a traumatic termination in my thirties after a long term partner refused to have the baby. I then spent 8 years dating and feeling despondent about the male species. I finally gave up hope but then met my current partner, also on the internet! I didn't expect to conceive at my age but secretly hoped it might just happen.
Apparently most youngsters meet via the internet these days, as opposed to more traditional means.

Not only are all we totally gorgeous and happening 40 somethings, we're also up to date with the trends!

Fortified · 03/05/2008 21:27

Me too - nothing to do with career. It took a long time to find the right man (or to grow up enough to recognise him when I saw him). And then a few more years to convince him that he was ready for marriage and family as he was 5 years younger than me.
I've yet to meet any "older mums" who consciously put babies on hold for career reasons. I agree with pwcbird, I'm quite glad to feel I've done the City career bit before having children. (I'm not at all sure how I feel about going back, either, but it might have to be done in a few years time!)

Kaz1967 · 04/05/2008 00:59

I didn't put off getting pregnant because of work either it just did not happen until now.

Fortuna · 04/05/2008 02:20

Hi, I too didn't consciously delay having a child, it just never happened. I was married to someone else previously and it never happened with him, now I am with my second husband (who is 5 years younger than me!) and everything clicked into place!

When I had DS, my waters broke but nothing happened immediately. Two days later I was induced, but still I wasn't dilating quickly enough. I had an emergency Caesarean, but as I said previously, was lucky enough to recover very quickly and had no problems at all.

On another note, DS is now two years old and I'm still breastfeeding him, something I'm quite proud of. The only problem is that I'm finding it rather painful of late. Do any of you 40+ mums have experience of breastfeeding toddlers?

Fortuna · 04/05/2008 02:24

Didoreth, ydych chi'n siarad Cymraeg?
(Do you speak Welsh?)

Takenoprisoners · 04/05/2008 02:28

Hello Fortuna - my baby is doing somersaults and has insisted I get up and surf on my birth ball at 2.25 am! Sorry to hear your breastfeeding has become painful ... do you have any idea what's causing it?

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johnworf · 04/05/2008 08:35

Takenoprisoners is this a shape of things to come do you think? Up at 2.25am. I think you need to have a quiet word with your bump about it's time keeping!

Arabella11 · 04/05/2008 08:37

Ladies - Thank you thank you thank you for your answers and feelings ont the IOL issue, I think we are going to sit it out and wait til we're a bit closer then see how we feel. I guess it's nice to have the choice, like you say, maybe I'll be climbing the walls by then.
This little chap is certainly more in the way this pg than ever before already!!!

Bella

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