When to tell child?

[djt87]

Hi!

It's reallyyyyy early days I'm only 4 weeks but out of curiosity I'm just wondering when you told your child/children you were pregnant? My little boy is 3 this month.

I’m 10 weeks and will be waiting until my dating scan to tell my 2 DC, despite having an earlier scan that showed all looked okay. My DC are 7 & 9 for reference.

Thanks for the reply! Have you told anyone else yet?

I didn't tell my boys (4 and 6 at the time) until after 20 week scan so we could say in one go: 'you're having a sister in a few months'. Also 20 weeks is a such long time to wait for one so young, definitely long enough! No need to extend the wait really.

I think we must have done similar with DS1 when DS2 was on the way. No need to tell them early on really. It's so abstract. Family and friends who knew are normal, considerate non-idiots so didn't let cat out of the bag.

About 12 weeks or so when I really needed her to stop bouncing on my belly!! Now I'm 30w and she talks to her baby sister (through my bellybutton), kisses her, asks if she's ok in there lol. It's very cute.

Ahh lovely!🥰 I think part of me feels bad telling other people before him...sounds so silly I know🤣

Yes my little boy is wild and stomps over me all day haha! How old is your daughter if you don't mind me asking?😌

After the 12 week scan. The risk of musscarriage was too high before that and I didn't want to have to explain that.

I also didn't want to risk anyone else let it slip so didn't want to wait much later

I didn't tell my daughter until I was about 30 week. 10 weeks is a lifetime for a little kids.

With our third. We told them after six months, so they only had three months to wait to meet their brother, now three. They were 7 and 4 at the time and hadn't noticed that mum was getting bigger.

@djt87 she'll be 3 in November 😊

12 weeks

My little boy is 2.5 and we only told him a couple of weeks ago when I was 23 weeks. He isn't showing much signs of understanding the concept yet, but we've got the "there's a house in mummy's tummy" book and will continue to build on it with explaining over the next 3 months.

Im in the same situation, have a 2.5 year old and am 14 weeks pregnant. I plan to wait until around 20 weeks or so as I just think it’s soo long for them to wait.
But the jumping on me is an issue!

After the 20 week scan assuming all OK.

I wouldn't want to have to explain a TFMR to a 3 year old.

I haven't yet but am planning on it once we have the screening results back after 12 week scan.

He's 4 and my partners family can be a bit stupid sometimes and would almost certainly say something in front of him and I don't want him to feel in the dark/excluded from the start. Otherwise we would have waited until 20 weeks.

Same here. I also wanted to be sure that my existing children didn't hear it from anyone else first.

I wanted the risk of miscarriage to be reducing and then we would start talking about the new baby in their presence. Cautiously, as I did have a history of miscarriage but I still didn't want other people telling them.

We told DD when I was 20wks, she was just about to turn 4. We found out we were having a boy and she was thrilled to tell everyone about her baby brother. I think it helped her understand that it was actually happening!

I've been poorly for 6 weeks so they were wondering why mammy isn't getting better but we told my 2&4 year old last week, I was 14 weeks 👍🏼

I’m 10 weeks atm and think we’ll tell DD after the dating scan, which will be at 13 weeks. Like others have said I don’t want anyone else to let it slip before we tell her.
That and I got very big very quickly when I was pregnant with her, there’s no way I could hide it until 20 weeks!
She will be 3 this week

Told my 4 year old last week when I was 14 weeks, he understands and needed to tell him so he understands why mummy can't play certain things and wants to lie down all the time! Only thing is he told everyone at nursery so glad we waited a little bit as we knew he'd want to talk about it.

I was about 16/17 weeks.
Our eldest (aged 8) didn't believe us and said we were making it up and our second child (aged 3) didn't really register at all except to protest that he didn't want a sister 🤣

I would wait until at least after 12 week scan, and then gradually introduce the idea of being a big brother through bedtime stories with siblings etc before actually telling them. There's then some good children's books about actually becoming a big brother/sister.

DD is two and we told her when I was 15 weeks, after the scan and my NIPT came back low risk.

We told her earlier because she's still really little and wouldn't fully understand. So I wanted to gently introduce her to the idea and help build her understanding of it with stories and exposure to other people's babies over time. I'm also small and my bump really popped overnight (!) so I didn't want anyone else telling her by accident.

I'm 10 weeks and have a 4 year old. At a minimum we will be waiting until 12 weeks ideally after the 20 week scan in case any anomalies are found. I have been struggling with sickness so that might tip our hand.

We waited until 20 weeks to tell my oldest (2 at the time). Then with dc3 had to tell earlier (dc1 was 3) as I had bad sickness and dc1 was worried.