Advice on 4 under 4

[Shaun3]

Hello! I have recently found out I’m pregnant with baby no.4 I have a one year old, a 2 year old and a 6 month old. This baby wasn’t planned but I love being a mum and I’m happy about the news. My family however aren’t supportive about the pregnancy. I’m a single mum and all my births are via c- section. I was wondering if anyone out there has experience anything similar to me or had 4 c-sections in 4 years. I’m worried my body won’t handle another surgery and obviously being a mum to three I need to be healthy for them.

You need to speak to a midwife, there are potentially serious health risks in this scenario that nobody online can reasonably advise about.

🤔

I had 3 in 38 months was hard enough.

Agree with this op - midwife is your best bet

Definitely not a wind up I don’t understand why people think that?

How is it not true? What’s the point in lying about how many kids etc I’ve had I came for advice not to lie to strangers on the internet

I would go seek medical advice and explore your options. I know it's not advised but also sure it won't be the first time somebody has been in the same or a similar situation. I hope things work out for you

You Def need to speak to a midwife. Your body is still healing from major surgery 6 months ago.

Is the father of this baby the same as the six month old? Is he not interested at all? If not does the other guy know you're pregnant? Would he wa t to be involved?

My one year old is 1 year and 10 months
my 2 year old is 2 years and 9 months and my 3rd baby is almost 6 months

Sounds incredibly tough on your body (and dangerous?) to have 4 c sections in 4 years. Please speak to your midwife.

Yeah same dad to all 4 but he left a few weeks ago nd isn’t interested anymore

Any reason you feel you have no option but to continue this pregnancy, which will undoubtedly be dangerous for you and cause additional stress and pressure and impact your existing children?

I have my own online business that I pay for my children with thanks. I would never have kids if I had no founds to provide the best care. My babies are my no.1 priority

Did your doctor not advise you wait 12-18m after a c section before each subsequent pregnancy?

No I feel I have options I was just curious if anyone else has had a similar experience to mine because I love being a mum and the thought of having an abortion greatly upsets me but obviously if it’s for the best I have no choice because my other 3 need me

Yes they did and I did use protection but obviously it didn’t work well enough

I think that taking this on will be extremely difficult, especially with no support around you.
How are you managing now with the 3? Personally I think you should seriously consider your options as it doesn't seem the best time to bring another baby into the house - for you or your 3 children.
It is a massive decision, I think you should speak to someone in real life about this and definitely get impartial medical advice on the impact on your body.
Things must be hard already, I wouldn't deliberately make them harder.

I have no real life experience to offer.

I have enough knowledge to know that MN is not the right place to find an answer, but your midwife is. Talk to them as a matter of urgency.

Ignore the judgy people on this thread and don't bother replying to them.

I have had two and I know how tough they are to heal from and what your body has to go through - it’s not easy especially facing the prospect of doing it alone with 4 under 4. If your contraception has failed on you 3 times I would urgently review it.

Thank you and yeah I have already made arrangements I have clinic calling me tomorrow and I’m waiting to be booked into hospital I was really just trying to find someone else out there in a similar situation.

No not three times just this baby I’m expecting now it failed the others were pretty much planned