Thinking about breastfeeding

[ftm20232020]

Hi all
just looking for advice and opinions on breastfeeding!
I formula fed my first who had terrible reflux and vomiting which lead to a bottle aversion and it really took its toll on me recording every feed worrying about her intake and led to pod 😩she ended up being fully off formula at 9 months (okayed by her dietitian)
I’m wondering if breast feeding my second would avoid this ie no bottle no aversion? And not actually being about to record feeds?
I would be having a section (previous emcs and a lot of trauma couldn’t do that again 🫣)
it’s not personally something I would of considered before but now I’m thinking it might be good?

I breastfed and recorded every feed. But it did seem much easier than bottle feeding as the food was always available and ready.

The downsides are that not all women or all babies find it easy or possible to breastfeed and difficulties establishing breastfeeding can cause some women a lot of pain and upset. You also don't get to share the waking up to feed overnight with a partner unless you express milk, which is time consuming and annoying. My baby wouldn't touch a bottle the first time we tried with expressed milk, so we had to keep trying for a few weeks. Eventually they took to a bottle and so that was the first time I could share the overnight feeding or go out for longer than the gap between their meals.

Overall it was a pleasant experience and very convenient so I'd recommend trying it.

However, as someone who didn't have these problems I can say that it was convenient and my baby never had any reflux issues. My understanding is that reflux and vomiting are far less of a problem for breastfed babies, but it's worth checking that.

It can be hard to establish breastfeeding first off, it will take 2-3 weeks and can be painful for a while. It is a lot of feeding in the beginning - I never got on with pumping so I was doing every feed, every night for years. Also my son wouldnt take a bottle at all by 7-8 months- it doesn't compare to boobies! Also some people are very against it and feel the need to comment for some reason- used to really piss me off. Saying that, once it's established its very easy, convenient and much cheaper than formula! But it really is a labour of love- I did it up till my son went to school, and it's one of my best accomplishments :)

just as a balance..I bf my two and found it really straight forward. First was a bit trickier to get going as we were both learning.

Neither ever took a bottle so all feeds were me. I didn't really mind that as to be honest was a nice break.

I fed out and about everywhere as needed (a year each) and never had a single negative look or comment.

For me, it was easy and free.

I know this isn't everyone's experience and for some it is a really hard slog or impossible.

My best advice would be give it a go for 4 weeks. Watch babies nappies as that will give you the best indication of what they are taking on. take what support is available. if it doesnt work out be kind to yourself- it isn't a failure.

Definitely give breastfeeding a go, and see how it goes :) it's often hard at first but gets easier after 2-3 months. Personally I found it great for baby and never experienced colic, reflux, wind. Maybe that's just luck though. And you could consider pumping as well? Just try everything and don't rule anything out off the bat, that way you'll figure out what works for both you and your baby.

I had the same experience with my first, cmpa, severe reflux, bottle and food aversion, etc. He has ongoing issues at age 5...

But I'm sat on the sofa breastfeeding his 2yo sister. She went on nursing strike once at a few months which of course triggered the anxiety, but it lasted a couple of days and dr Google was excellent (basically just be naked and snuggle until it's over). I have never recorded a feed with dd, I haven't weighed her in about 8 months as she's lovely and chunky and a great eater.

I also had a planned cesarean with ds (breech) but a successful and fast vbac with dd.

My top tips for breastfeeding (having read the entire Internet before dd was born, i was very concerned about cmpa again and was dairy and soya free for 2 months pre birth) are to basically be topless, relax, and drink lots.

I think I was really lucky, breast fed DD for 2 years, she latched on straight away, some pain for first few days then no issues at all. Never got mastitis, she never had reflux or any digestive issues, never even had to burp her. She wouldn't ever take a bottle so all feeds were on me, didn't have a night away until she was over one but that was fine with me.I never recorded feeds, she put on weight really fast and was a chunky baby. Hoping that my experience will be the same second time round.
If it works well for you and baby it makes things much easier in my opinion, also definitely got less bugs!

For the first few days I recorded every feed, then realised it was just making me very stressed. Then I just fed her every two hours (or whatever was recommended at that age) which was about how often she got hungry and then as they get older you leave longer between feeds, I found I just got to know her cues and could feed on demand.
Same as PP mine refused a bottle at 6 months when I tried to stop breastfeeding so I carried on until she was 1 and then she went to nursery so that weaned her during the day and she had cows milk in a straw cup. I had used a straw cup when she started having water so she was used to it, a completely different suction motion so it wasn't like I was trying to replace the boob.

I would keep an open mind and give it a try. It was the best thing for us and I'll be breast feeding this baby (currently 6m). It wasn't all easy but it was worth it and I think I had the right attitude of allowing it to not work if it didn't. I would recommend colostrum harvesting from 37weeks as I honestly think this helped my milk come in and I also had a c section.

Do you have a local bf group? I went along to mine at about 35 weeks as I was clueless and curious and it gave me a tonne of confidence to at least try it xxx

I am still breastfeeding my 13m old and wouldn’t change it for the world, though there have been parts that felt like a huge challenge that I really wasn’t expecting. My DS had horrendous reflux from 3 weeks old. It ended up being due to an undiagnosed tongue tie that led to shallow breastfeeding latch. It was missed as he was a big boy and gained weight despite the vomiting (15 times a day) and I experienced no latching pain, after the initial adjusting and soreness. It eventually snipped at 3 months and the reflux went away completely when he was about 5 months. His inefficient latch gave me a big oversupply too, which made his reflux worse.

So just giving a different view as reflux can still happen, so if you are able to I’d go along to a breastfeeding support group and ask them to check your latch, my local LLL group were invaluable and were the ones that told me to get his tongue tie checked.

I did record every feed too, and he didn’t take a bottle so there have been times when I felt like I needed a break (every bedtime and every nap time for a year takes its toll!). But like I said, I have absolutely loved feeding him and will carry on for as long as it works for us both. I have found it so convenient when out and about too! And when travelling.

I loved breastfeeding. There were shit bits about it but overall it’s not just feeding your baby but a whole amazing part of your relationship.

I just can't think of any negatives (as long as you can and I appreciate that some women can't). It's just so easy. A constant supply. No making up bottles, no sterilising, no cost. My children both woke up once in the night for a feed. I didn't even get out of bed for either of them. Fed them both, in the dark. Quick cuddle and back in bed.

Ive bf two babies (second one is 4 months) first one I breastfed "normally" for 2.5 years and the second one im exclusively expressing.

Personally I think expressing is easier. Luckily I have been able to establish a good supply which has helped but the fact anyone can help with feeds, I'm not tied to baby all the time and less feeling of being touched out has been why I've found it better. The washing up is annoying but I don't sterilise.

There were definitely cons to feeding directly from the breast, its very convenient, no washing up, no getting out of bed to feed.

Neither of my babies have had any gut issues/ reflux/ colic

I also don't count feeds, i dont time how long she has gone in between feeds and I could only give approximately how many oz she drinks in a day based on how much milk I pump. I feed on demand as any other bf baby would/ wet/dirty nappies etc, its all very relaxed

Just curious if anyone has successfully breastfeed if they have rather small boobs? I'm definitely not blessed in the chest department and despite trying to breastfeed my first 3 children, it was never a success. Even though midwives, health visitors etc said it wouldn't make a difference, I feel like it made it too hard to find the right position and to actually get anything going. I'd like to try again with this baby but I wonder if I'm just setting myself up for disappointment

Breastfeeding is by far the hardest thing I've ever done. I BF for around 18 months and had a very hard start. I had issues with low supply, then a shallow latch, then with a fast letdown, honestly it can require a lot of support and tracking before you reach the 'stress free' phrase you might be picturing. A lot of babies can also still have bottle aversion, particularly if it's not introduced early, and you will likely want that flexibility. It felt like I had this amazing super power some days, but that it was a curse on others when she would only accept boob to sleep. It's not an easy journey, but only you can decide if it's the right one for you.

Despite the challenges, it was absolutely worth it for me and I now really miss it (we stopped in November when DD was 17 months). The oxytocin boost of each feed also helped me get through some lows and made me live in the moment a little more.

If you decide to go for it, I'd suggest finding a decent lactation consultant near you in advance. The NHS also runs a support group in my area that I found brilliant.

I ended up EBF my first because of bottle aversion due to reflux, just like your baby. I'd planned for my partner to do more of the feeds but after a particularly awful car journey which always made her reflux worse, she point-blank refused bottles forever. So it was boob or nothing.

I did time every feed, but I think not being able to see precisely how much she'd had did take the pressure off a bit - all I saw was her feeding until she was full, whereas if she'd been unlatching from a bottle that still had X amount in it I bet I'd have worried more and tried to get her to finish it up. I might have paid less attention to whether she was actually content.

I can only speak for myself but I had an ELCS (breech baby) which was lovely and calm, and didn't struggle too much to establish breastfeeding after it. It sounds like you really went through the mill with your first baby, so choosing the ELCS is a good idea: you'll be starting out in such a better place - calmer, rested, less traumatised... that's better for you and baby. Remember also that you won't be a first time mum this time and that'll help you feel a good bit calmer too. If reflux happens again you'll be able to spot the signs sooner and advocate for your baby and yourself. It sounds like you have lots of ideas re how to make this time round better for your mental health, and that's such a good start.

Good luck! Rooting for you whatever you decide.

Breastfeeding can be tricky to establish but once you're past that it's so convenient. Always the right emount ready at any time. You don't need to record feeds as long as baby is gaining weight and has plenty of wet and dirty nappies.

I really would recommend some Breastfeeding specific antenatal classes so you know what to expect. La Leche League run online ones and in my area I know of a local charity that runs them in person. You can go along to breastfeeding support groups when you're pregnant too. I would also recommend Global Health Media videos on how to get a good latch. These were the best ones I've seen and I watched a lot with my first baby!

I did have lots of issues feeding with my first but I think I went into it blind thinking it will all come naturally and not really doing enough research. But once we got going it was so convenient and we weaned at 22 months so I could have medical treatment. But I have multiple friends whose baby latched first time and just kept going for years, never any issues.
Good luck with whatever you decide to do.

I loved breastfeeding. The first six weeks could, at times, be more challenging because the cluster feeding meant I was breastfeeding for hours on end some days. But it was so worth it. Since about 2 months old I have absolutely loved it. It's convenient, helps with bonding, amazing for immunity and just generally something I really enjoy doing now at 8 months old. It releases a relaxing hormone I think which helps! I am planning on continuing to at least 18 months old.

Hi @SantasRubiksCube i am pretty much flat chested and breastfed 5 kids. You will have boobs - even if just a bit and I found holding my babies higher and directly across from my nipples was easier than below - if that makes sense. But the midwives are right- it makes no difference and sometimes it is easier than if you have enormous breasts (as I have witnessed before).

@ftm20232020 give it a go! Nothing ventured nothing gained. Be aware that the first 2/3 weeks can be very hard but don’t give up in this time window and you should come out the other side. After leaving hospital I stopped recording feeds. Just make sure to put baby on breasts whenever you can. You can do this!

I bf all four of mine for different lengths of time. 10wks, 4m, 3m, 11m. The last baby was quite premature so I mostly pumped for 5 months (even through the night as was up feeding her). Then she went onto fully breastfeeding. I loved feeding her, but she self weaned and I pumped for a month or so just to slowly reduce my milk production.
Try lots of different positions and try not to give up at the first few hurdles. Latch is everything, it's why I couldn't breastfeed my youngest for so long. I loved the football hold as it left my hands free. It is a fab position for babies that are fussy at the nipple too. Every hospital has a lactation nurse/ specialist midwife . Ask to see them and keep asking until you feel 100% confident. Don't go home until you and baby have got it nailed. They won't mind in the hospital. They love to help woman who want to breastfeed have a successful journey. They're also fabulous helping women who have babies that are having trouble with babies and bottles.

I BF both of mine, also had ELCS both times. I was lucky that for me it Just Worked so I had the benefits (convenience...) but less of the downsides.

They can still be refluxy though - DC1 wasn't but DC2 is. The advice is to feed your baby more upright but that's tricky - my boobs are where they are (I just keep her head higher than her stomach). Gaviscon is easier to give them in a bottle - but you can give it on a spoon if BF (I only give it to mine once or twice a day, in a bottle of either pumped milk or formula).

I'm honestly not trying to put you off, I love breastfeeding my two - just wanted to point out it might not necessarily prevent reflux! Also that your second may not be as refluxy as your first!

I breast fed my second child who found it hard to latch. I use nipple shields for about 8 months. It was hard work and extremely frustrating at times but I was proud of myself for succeeding. I then carried on until he was 2

I really struggled with breastfeeding to begin with, had mastitis and a lot of pain early on. There was a truly wonderful local breastfeeding support service who were amazing, they sent two different breastfeeding consultants out to the house and were just really practical and kind, including suggestions on pain relief and getting dh to give a bottle of formula in the evenings to give me a break. Do seek out help, and don’t feel bad if it doesn’t come naturally. I ended up breastfeeding for a year and was fine but it took a few weeks to become established and comfortable and I would have given up in the first two weeks had I not had support so I guess longwindedly trying to say don’t put too much pressure on yourself and ask for help if you need it.

I have a bit of experience of both - was hoping to breastfeed but knew it might be more challenging (flat/inverted nipples). My DD initially was only latching on one side (the more prominent side), and after trying to pump, breastfeeding support etc etc she wasn't regaining her birth weight, and I was getting anxious and stressed, so we supplemented with bottles/formula. I absolutely hated bottles - so much faffing, so much less convenient, and just felt emotionally like I was failing. And pumping never worked for me. We eventually got back to exclusively breastfeeding at around 4 months (just using the 1 side). By the point I was wanting to get back on track, DD was gaining weight well. So I went on a breastfeeding mission to feed, feed, feed and it worked.

Looking back, I wish I had never started supplementing and just kept persevering for a bit longer, but I wasn't in the right state of mind after birth.

Found it so much easier exclusively breastfeeding as didn't need to worry about bottles. Particularly in the night - so much easier to cosleep and breastfeed. I don't mind that it was all on me (I actually really hated people asking if they could bottle feed my baby when we were combi feeding - the only other person I felt was appropriate to feed baby was my partner).

Also, I give zero cares about breastfeeding from 1 side only - yes I was a bit lopsided, but did it matter? No.

I got pregnant for second time when DD was 16 months. Supply pretty much entirely went by 16 weeks. We've carried on dry-nursing, but I've had awful aversions during pregnancy, and its the only time I've really not enjoyed breastfeeding. We've been slowly reducing and reducing. I've just started dropping the last feed before bed, and my DD is 2 years in a few weeks.

I'm 34 weeks pregnant and whilst I'm going to try to get breastfeeding established on both sides, I'm also not going to tie myself in knots over it.

Oh, invest in some lanolin nipple cream and reusable breast pads for the initial stint. I also found the haaka milk collector useful for collecting the letdown on the side I didn't feed from (I leaked from this side for a very long time) which we added to bottles when we did combi feed.

We also wanted to avoid using a dummy with DD, and breastfeeding is very useful in this respect. Boob is a fail-safe solution to nearly everything in the early days - tired? hungry? teething? overstimulated? anything-at-all-wrong? Have a boob, and the world will be better 😂