Newly pregnant - hard to wait to tell people

[rosegold103]

I found out yesterday morning I was pregnant! It was a surprise but i'm excited. I already feel like 12 weeks is FOREVER away though and I'm worrying about keeping it to ourselves until then. I know I want to wait until then to tell people, but does feel like an age! Anyone else just feel WEIRD like they're walking around with a huge secret about to be busted any minute?? I can't really explain it 😂🙈

congratulations how far are you? i found out last night.. but im not sure on mine (just posted a new thread) im nervous! xx

I made the decision to tell close family and friends at 8 weeks. I figured that if anything went wrong I would want their support so they would need to know.

Awww congratulations to you both!! I have no advice to offer but do what feels right for you! 💐

Well, if you're that keen to tell people, why is it you want to wait? I waited till 19 weeks to tell anyone other than DH and my line manager, because another condition had just been discovered and it wasn't clear I'd be able to continue the pregnancy, but in fact I probably wouldn't have told people much sooner anyway. In fact, a couple of close friends and colleagues had guessed, but were tactful enough to keep it to themselves.

So just tell people if you want to. We called both parents and PIL pretty much as soon as we knew, a few friends as and when over the next few weeks.

A few more people at 10 weeks because we were at a wedding and some people asked why I wasn't drinking. Couldn't be arsed with any of that hiding soft drinks/lying about antibiotics/health kick etc rubbish.

First pregnancy ended in miscarriage. Didn't change how I approached telling people second and third time round.

Edited just because I'd accidentally capitalised "WE" and it looked like unintended emphasis!

Second pregnancy, currently 31 weeks both times I have told close family friends early and work colleagues just before 12 weeks mainly due to sickness.

I figured if anything were to happen I'd tell people too and I think suffering in silence almost making loss a taboo is very damaging. But everyone will process that prospect differently so each to their own.

What I've not done is big or flashing social media announcements so still bumping into some people who are shocked I suddenly have a big bump but these are people I'm not close with to speak often.

There's no set rules, I enjoyed sharing the early excitement both times.

Congrats, I found out on Friday ☺️

I have told my 2 closest friends and that's it. I've already booked a private scan at 8 weeks and will tell close family after that. I might tell my boss sooner depending on how I'm feeling. Everyone else can wait till 12 weeks. I want to shout from the rooftops but scared incase something goes wrong and have to go around un-telling everyone which is why it's close friends and family first.

I told my family straight away, I didn't see the point in hiding it as I always get really sick so they probably would guess anyway, for other people we waited until the scan but we'd already told people close to us previously I am nearly 22 weeks now and believe me it goes by so quickly!

I had ivf and told immediate family, 2 best friends and work straight away. Told extended family etc at 12 weeks. The issue with telling people early is the reality that sometimes things go wrong, but I’d want the support of those who knew anyway so them knowing would never be an issue for me. Just do what you’re comfortable with. There’s no rules.

@laurplus4 only 4 weeks, so very new!

I think I do want to wait until 12 weeks just wondered if anyone else felt weird / anxious like they've got something to hide 😂🙈 hopefully as a few more weeks pass so will that feeling but will tell people earlier if I have to

Congratulations! I found out on Saturday after 3 years of infertility (and our second IVF round).
We also wanted to keep it to ourselves but unfortunately, I needed to visit the dentist today and my sister in law works there 😂 so I had to tell her! She’s very good though and has said she won’t tell a soul. I did tell my mum though because ours is an IVF baby and my mum knew I was going into hospital two weeks ago and clearly knew it would be around now we would find out! I think it’s just one of those where you just got to do what’s right for you and if you suddenly blurt it out, or something makes you tell someone - don’t beat yourself up for not waiting!

Congratulations!!

I’ve always wondered why people choose 12 weeks as the time to tell people. If you want to tell people, tell them whenever you want to!

I'm 10 weeks tomorrow, I am trying to wait until 12 weeks because we've had a missed miscarriage before.
Only problem is it's my 4th and I'm already having to wear baggy clothes so I might not be able to hide it much longer.

@Lj8893 you wait until your 12 week scan so you know all is OK. While it's not nice to think about, some pregnancies end in a miscarriage (more than most people think) so it's always best to wait before telling people.
I know it feels like an absolute age! I found out at 5 weeks and was dying to tell people. Just enjoy your "special secret" until then, OP. I didn't even tell my parents until after the scan as didn't want to get their hopes up unnecessarily.

I ended up calling the fire service out at work one late shift as I could smell something burning…… absolutely no one else could- but they found someone fixing an escalator very far away from our desks who was burning something off…. my boss was like wow your sense of smell is just like when I was pregnant I was well and truly busted at that point 🤣

I waited til 12 weeks first time to tell anyone other than my husband , second time hid it wil I was 5.5month apart from very select few close friends. Currently 7 weeks pregnant with my third and have told a couple close friends but no family yet

We had multiple rounds of failed IVF where we had told our family.Then we had a round where it did work and they were so excited for us but it ended in an early miscarriage..I was devastated that I had got their hopes up and had to tell them..so this time I waited until a viability scan at 6-7 weeks and then only told very close family. Told close friends at 12 weeks and work-the wider circle at 16 weeks.
However it's an individual thing and there's absolutely no reason why you shouldn't tell people earlier if you want to.

I get that, I really do, but as awful as it sounds, baby loss can happen at any gestation of pregnancy, even after 12 weeks.

@JollyHostess101 that is impressive 😂😂 I'm nervous about work and giving it away, job will be a lot easier if nobody knows for as long as possible... so nervous about the morning sickness 🙈😂

I found out at 6 weeks - my '12 week' scan is 19th. I have told people that I have needed to for work, my closest friends and my parents and PIL. It was too hard with what I do for work to hide it as it's very active so some adjustments had to be made which would have raised more questions. I just want everyone to know as me and DH are so excited after trying for 15 months and the 6 week wait from finding feels like an eternity!

We had IVF and I'm currently 9w. I'd told family and friends I'd had a BFN the first round of IVF we had, so the fact I've not said this time might have made people wonder, but thankfully nobody has asked directly. We saw family at the weekend and I think my mum cottoned on when I wasn't drinking, I was asking her for decaf tea, and I didn't want to have brie after dinner 😂I want to wait to 12 weeks so all the blood tests are done and there's a lower chance of bad news. DP's family are also on holiday until around that time and would rather tell in person.

Congratulations sending lots of positive vibes your way for the next few weeks 🥰 I feel the same feel like every time I have a decaf people know 😂 but I'm sure they don't. We're having an early scan at 8 weeks just to check everything but probably still won't tell family until 12 weeks. How are you feeling? X

It is the most exciting amazing news.

For me just saying the words, them coming out of my mouth tempted fate and meant loss.
So for that reason, I didnt tell anyone except my husband until about 16 weeks.
Even then it was only management at work and close family in case I needed time off for loss.

Of course it was my own superstition but also I found it extraordinarily entitled and presumptive of people announcing pregnancy at 4,5,6,7,8 weeks.
Again projecting my own awful experiences on others.

It is joyful news when all is well.

Thanks @rosegold103, I don't really have many symptoms so don't feel or look pregnant! Had bloods done yesterday and a scan booked at 13w. We already had a scan at 6w at IVF clinic and saw the heartbeat but I still don't quite believe it's happening!

We didn't wait. It was coming up to Christmas though and as I had told them the Christmas before that I was engaged we just waited til then. I was six weeks.
Not sure about this waiting thing anyway. If something happens you'd want the support of your family, so why not share the good news? Maybe not go totally public, but close family and friends.