Disappointed with 3rd baby gender after having a boy and a girl

[Starfish00]

I'm currently pregnant with my 3rd (unexpectedly) and feeling gender disappointment for the first time in my life. I am blessed with a healthy daughter and a healthy son and now we just found out we are expecting another little girl... I have to mention here that since this pregnancy was unplanned, I struggle to bond with my 3rd baby and feel close to nothing when I imagine her joining our family in few months. This is a very strange feeling and unpleasant one at that since I never had any issues in previous pregnancies and loved my kids from the very beginning of pregnancy.

Until my 16 week scan I Thought I had no preferences re gender of 3rd but turns out I actually had. Im trying to keep it together but deep inside I am honestly shattered that it's a girl. My daughters will be 6 years apart, same as myself and my sister with whom I have no contact. I think the age gap was just too big, we grew apart completely when I went to college and then got married and moved away and our relationship is non existent. She didn't meet my kids either. Last few years, I'm struggling terribly and tried to reach out to her on multiple occasions but she said she doesn't need me in her life and she prefers it this way. The thought of my daughters being 6 years apart gives me chills. I physically cannot relive this bizarre situation with my own children and at the moment I do not see any chance in my daughters having a successful relationship. I would so much prefer for this little girl to be actually a boy since my son is only 3 and they would be closer in age...

It doesn't help that my husband's family was not happy for us to have a 3rd in general and made it clear on several occasions that they would only be happy with a boy since my son is the only boy in the whole family...

I feel terrible and I told no one about what strange feelings I'm working through right now. I don't know what to do or how to get out of this. This lack of relationship with my sister caused me a lot of grief and very dark feelings over the years... I can't do this again.

I didn't have a third child because I had a gender preference. I have a boy then girl. I wanted a boy because I thought my child would lose her identity as a middle child. Girls are keepers. Your son will not be middle child but he will be your only son. Gender isn't an obstacle to a close relationship. You may look at this very differently in 10 years. ❤️

My brothers 1 and 2, don't have the best relationship, 5 years between them. But they both have a decent relationship with brother 3, despite a respective 15 and 10 year age gap.

Age gap isn't a determinant for how close you'll be, and will fade in significance over time.

Age gap means nothing in terms of closeness. My son is 20. My daughter is 13. They are absolutely inseparable and very close. I love it and the bond they share makes me so comfortable to know they will always have each other when we are gone.

6.5 yrs between them.