What would make you more than 2 children?

[Happinessischocolate123]

I have 2 girls who are 3 and 4.
My husband and I work full time and live a very comfortable life. We are expats, and have a nanny, cleaner and can afford to go away every holiday.
I am getting really broody and want another child. I would love to have a little 'gang' of children who always have each other.
My husband isn't so keen on the idea and has said how life has started to get a lot easier now the girls are more independent and we shouldn't change that... saying that, he isn't 100% sure.
If you had more than two l, why?
If you want to stick with two, why?

I have lots of siblings, we all get on even if some are closer to some and more distant from others. I’d have had lots if I could have given them a great life but felt for our financial position 2 was sensible.

I echo what @ACynicalDad said

I was adamant that I didn't want children- then abruptly changed my mind just in time to sneak in 2 under the wire! I would have loved more- but it was probably just my hormones' dying gasp🤣

My first pregnancy was twins and I just wanted the experience of having a single baby!

I have 2. I don't have the mental energy for another. Financially we would be fine but I feel my energy reserves are used up with the ones I have. My youngest just started school and I'm embracing life being slightly easier, not wishing for the toddler days.

Mine have a great bond. I don't massively see they would benefit from another. Maybe as adults, but my youngest definitely has the potential to become the forgotten middle child if we had another. We are both 1 of 3 but this is right for us.

We stuck at 2 because I couldn't bring up more than 2 children the way I wanted to raise my kids, whilst also maintaining a career, my marriage and my own mental health. I wanted a certain lifestyle, and I wanted to maintain a certain level of engagement with my kids, so for me, 2 was my limit. 3 would have been spreading myself and my resources too thin.

I have one and another on the way we’ve always wanted two. For us two is manageable (hopefully) for things like holidays as you’re each responsible for one child - any more would be difficult when it comes to finding a suitable car / going on holidays sitting together on the plane etc

I had a brother and so did my husband so perhaps cuz we’re from two children families that may have had an influence as well

xx

I wanted 2 but I'm now pregnant with twins so it will be 3.

Definitely nervous that 3 will be too many.

@SouthLondonMum22 Snap!! Going from 1 to 3 is going to be wild 🤯

@SouthLondonMum22 @KMM87 congratulations!!
I didn't even think about having twins! 2 to 4 would be crazy!!
I guess the two main factors are time with individual kids and money!

Nothing. Not having kids is the best thing you can do for the planet - having more than 2 is total unnecessary. And I’m one of 3, and I’ve always disliked it

@Happinessischocolate123 absolutely, I think personality comes into it as well, I'm someone that relishes my own time, also time on my own with DH, so I try to balance that with making sure I spend time with my kids too, whereas others are perfectly content spending all their time with their family units. So 3 kids would be a struggle for me in that regard trying to divide my time, but not for others.

Will be sticking with 2. Would love more as I love the baby/toddler stage but don't want to go through with PGP again.

I would have had 3 if i could have had better ante-natal and post natal care, a night nanny, enough money for a bigger house, a cleaner and probably a day nanny too.

I have 4, the teen years have been tough!!

You have absolutely no idea that they will ‘always have each other’

Have another child because you want another child. It’s your life.

but if them being an eternal support system and gang for life is what is fuelling your broodiness- best to knock it on the head. For every lovely girl gang of sisters I know, I can also think of another where the dynamics are askew. Whether that’s a case of a) they seem to ‘like’ each other but one does all the elderly care whilst their siblings have fucked off to b) out and out dislike

imo once kids are in school there is very little time for ‘quality time’ with each of them. once you are talking a planned 3+…you are actively sacrificing that strong, parental quality time for the hope that a sibling relationship will be worth the divided attention. However, you can never have complete confidence that the sibling relationship will be worth it.

Congratulations! I'm due in April and still...adjusting. Definitely going to be a wild ride!

Also an expat.
*Factor in flights.
I often fly alone with my children and think any more than two is challenging. That said I met a woman flying with 13 children once 😯

• Holidays When they are under 10 you can squeeze into one 2 bedded room on a stopover. In hotels most interconnecting rooms are made for families of four.

I was one of 2. One of us had cancer as a child and I remember overhearing my mother on the phone saying how she wished she had more children (she was 43 when her child got cancer). My grandmother also only had 2 children and one died of cancer as a teenager. Very very hard on a single surviving child. 2 wasn't enough in our family sadly.
I have 3 and honestly love it.

It's ultimately the thought of when they're older and want to do different things and the inevitable facilitating we'd have to do. 3 or more small children I could probably manage with paid help but not the later years.

We had two because we wanted having children to be a happy and positive experience, not a stressful one and we think having more would have tipped the balance into stressful!

We wanted to be able to give them a lot of our time and attention and two felt very manageable for that. It has been at all ages.

We also still wanted time as a couple and those we knew with more children, found finding time for each other harder.

😱 were they all her own children or other family? That sounds like a nightmare 😧

We had two because we wanted having children to be a happy and positive experience, not a stressful one and we think having more would have tipped the balance into stressful!

Yes I agree with this also.

Devilsmommy
All her own from a baby in arms to a 16 Yr old. They were American , I suspect Mormon by the attire. All relocating to join the Dad working in oil and gas industry.
All amazingly behaved too.

I’m stopping at 2 as:

-I don’t want kids past 35
-I don’t want a 3rd c section
-I don’t have any more bedrooms
-I can’t afford a bigger car, or more nursery fees
-We don’t have any local family support and we’re knackered