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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Pregnant at 38 - how common?

56 replies

arbitraryarsehole · 29/09/2023 20:53

It hasn't happened yet, just a thought. I know lots of people wait these days but would it be considered fairly normal or would I be an 'older mum' surrounded by much younger mums? I feel like statistics and circumstances and things cloud my judgement and now I can't figure out if it's normal or not...

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Winnipeggy · 29/09/2023 22:20

I was pregnant at 38 and don't feel like an old mum at all. She was my first, I am now trying for a second and will be at least 40 if it happens. I spend every day on adventures with my toddler, I think we do everything that a mum in her twenties would do. The only downside in my head is that I love being a mum so much I do kinda wish I'd started earlier simply so I'd have spent more of my life with her.

Rockschooldropout · 29/09/2023 22:23

I had my youngest at 38 - she’s nearly 14 now .. I certainly didn’t feel old at the time although I was incredibly insulted when they wrote “elderly multigravida “ on my notes !!!

Faz469 · 29/09/2023 22:25

I'm 37 n my LO turns 12 weeks on Monday. He's my first. My best friend has a 6 week old she's also 37. Lots of people wait these days. Don't worry.

allgoodthings84 · 30/09/2023 05:12

I’m 38 with a nearly 6 week old. I also have an 8 year old. In my area there’s plenty of mums of all ages so I forget I’m classed as an “old mum”. There’s loads of older mums around. My midwife even told me that 38 (or older) is pretty common these days and didn’t bat an eyelid. You don’t tend to get any extra scans etc unless you’re 40+ these days either.

Goldencup · 30/09/2023 05:54

GlamGiraffe · 29/09/2023 21:24

In London very normal.I expected to be the oldest woman there at 42, I was a long way from it.

Wow really this does surprise me. I know exactly 1 woman who had a baby later than this. Yes am South East.

sunlightinthetrees · 30/09/2023 05:57

It will depend a lot on where you live. Where I am, 38 is a very normal age to have a baby, possibly around average.

I had mine at 30 and 32 and I’m a lot younger than most mums here.

BugsyDrakeTableScape · 30/09/2023 06:01

I had #1 at 34 #2 at 37 and #3 at 40. Now #1&2 are at school - I'm very slightly older than most in 1s year and pretty much bang on with everyone in 2s year. I will be 45 when #3 starts school so will be interesting to see if the Demographic changes again

JoanThursday · 30/09/2023 06:19

Rockschooldropout · 29/09/2023 22:23

I had my youngest at 38 - she’s nearly 14 now .. I certainly didn’t feel old at the time although I was incredibly insulted when they wrote “elderly multigravida “ on my notes !!!

Edited

Yes!

Although my mum had that on her notes when she had my brother in the 1970s. He is the youngest of three ... and she was 30!

Philandbill · 30/09/2023 06:25

Most of my uni friends have had children at about that age or slightly later. I did too and not a problem then. Won't be able to take early retirement though as we'll want to support her through university.

fancyfrogs · 30/09/2023 06:25

Definitely seems to vary on location doesn't it. I had mine at 26 and 28 (yes, married and had a career beforehand) and I'd say the average age at baby classes etc was probably about early 30s here in the NE and about half of the people I went to school with have children by 30.

LeopardLover · 30/09/2023 11:51

Definitely completely normal! I'm pregnant with my second at 37 ( first is 2). I went to look around a local preschool/school this week and I was probably the second youngest out of quite a large group which was quite surprising. I still feel like I'm in my 20s, age is just a number after all ha ha.

Fridaysgirl17 · 30/09/2023 11:57

I was 33 having my first & in my birthing class there was actually people I was in school with same age, & older & I had my second @ 37 & it was in 2020 & honestly it was fine I was never referred to as an older mother etc & from what I saw there was plenty in around my age them too

ThomasinaLivesHere · 30/09/2023 12:42

While it does depend on where you live even in more working class areas you won’t be the only one. Around my 38th birthday is when my second son is due to be born and we live in a small town in Scotland. There’s another woman in my team at work who is also pregnant and she’s 40.

Jk987 · 30/09/2023 12:57

It's your life, don't let other people's possible viewpoints influence when or if you have a child! If you want one, don't delay. No one would bat an eyelid where I am in South London.

UnderstatedElegance · 30/09/2023 13:15

I'm 38 and currently pregnant. I'll be 39 when the baby is born.

theduchessofspork · 30/09/2023 13:17

Not unusual anywhere

But how much you will be an older mum will depend on where you live

BucksOxonMum · 30/09/2023 13:18

I’m 43 and we have just started ttc. Completely normal here to be in the older end. Don’t let it bother you x

Oldermum84 · 30/09/2023 13:18

I'm 38 and pregnant. Definitely feel like an older mum hence my username. It isn't unusual, but I am feeling my age. Am much happier being pregnant than not though!

Olika · 30/09/2023 13:22

If you want to have a baby, have a baby.

TotalOverhaul · 30/09/2023 13:24

I had DC t 38 and 39. I was among the older mums at school. But there were at least 5 other mums my age or older. And several just a couple of years younger. The very young mums ( early or mid twenties) were far rarer.

yeveamgirl · 30/09/2023 13:29

I'm 30 and maybe it's just the area I work but all the mum friends I've made are 35+, most are around 37/38. In the baby (so to speak). For me it feels weird to have a almost 2yo and only be 30!

Justgonefishing · 30/09/2023 13:30

It will be both ends of the spectrum in many areas, I had my first at 38 and the mum of one of my daughters friends was 20 years younger than me!

Ruffpuff · 30/09/2023 13:32

I’m 26 and had mine at 21. Anyone under 40 with a 4 year old is pretty rare in my area. I stick out like a sore thumb. You’re much more likely to fit in at 38.

Plus, you won’t have a the annoying assumptions made about where you work/live/whether you went to uni, etc. People will automatically assume that you’ve got a lovely home and a good career - I get the opposite!

Thebigblueballoon · 30/09/2023 13:34

I had this exact conversation with my GP this week and she didn’t batt an eyelid at my concerns. Assured me it was totally normal and the idea that pregnancies in late 30s/early 40s were unusual was largely inaccurate.

TheDuchessOfMN · 30/09/2023 13:36

Loads of my friends had babies in their 40s.

My grandmother had 4 in her 40s, including twins. It’s not at all unusual.

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