Married in 5 weeks, 42 in 5 months, to old to ttc?

[GCOG]

I’m stressed and overwhelmed. Get married in 5 weeks. 2nd marriage. Neither of us have children. We’ve never previously tried before or had enough regular sex to get caught before we met. Both Christian so won’t be ttc until we’re married. We’re both excited about a new life together. We’d love kids. Regular period and ovulation. No diagnosis. Don’t smoke or drink alcohol. Both regular walkers as we have a dog and it’s our hobby. Healthy diet. I vape when I’m stressed. I had bloods done. AMH low due to my age. Both taking conception max supplements for a few months. Don’t know if it’s just wedding anxiety but I’m feeling depressed that we won’t have a family and that I’ve ran out of time. Looking to do a house swap to with housing association in his area so we can move to a joint marital home together out of our single homes. That could be stressing me out. Just feeling anxiety and low. Just poor mental health as I’ve become a general worrier as the wedding get closer. Fiancé says I’m stressy and it’s getting him down and causing arguments. Huge argument yesterday for all the neighbours to hear. Don’t want the wedding to be called off. Feel consumed with the thoughts I won’t have children. Any words of support? Stories of hope? Strength to share while I feel like hiding under my duvet forever.

I couldn't read this and not say something. You are not too old, some work colleagues have gotten pregnant at your age, generally it could take longer but you never know with nature! My advise would be to relax and take it easy and no stress about it, I know it is easier said that done but try to enjoy these weeks leading to the wedding and the wedding itself!

I think just don't make it your focus. I know that's easier said than done

Focus on the wedding for now. Enjoy!

If you've had tests done and done all the preliminary things you can do then just relax. There's not much else you can do and it's great they didn't spot anything obviously concerning.

You're doing all the right things. Hopefully someone will be along with some more practical advice

I'm 42 and 11 weeks pregnant, no you're not too old. If you want to try for a baby, by all means do. The only thing I would say is that it is much more stressful as more things can go wrong.

People do have babies at 42 but it's not always as easy. I recommend getting Agnus catctus supplements they are excellent for getting your cycle back on track. I think they helped me conceive dc2 .

Not too old. Plus 6 months is a nice window to prep your body for TTC, eg taking coq10 is good for old eggs! Recommend reading it starts with the egg. Am 41 and just starting to think about no2. Good luck!

I'm pregnant at 42. Will be my first child (2 MCs).

No it's not necessarily too late.

How low is low AMH? Did you both have fertility MOT?

I think AMH will be important - is it low for your age or because of your age? It's possible to conceive at 42 for sure but I think you can probably only really give yourself 6 months or so before thinking about moving to fertility treatment depending on your AMH.

Thank you for your kind words 💗

Thank you 💗

Congratulations and thank you for your reply 💗

My cycle is regular. I've been taking Vitabiotics Pregnacare Conception Max for about 6 months. Thank you for your reply.

Don't wait another 5 weeks there's no point. Come off contraception now and enjoy as much sex as possible.

When you say low AMH, have you been advised that it’s too low? I would start ttc as soon as married and, if you can afford it, pay for the full battery of at a fertility clinic now fo see what your chances are (although this wouldn’t be able to tell u for definite).

My parents were 42 when I was born OP and my mother hated sex and this was over 60 years ago so no medical help either! Just go for it. I hope you get pregnant really easily, lots of women do at that age you know! Good luck.

Thank you for your reply. I'm taking Vitabiotics Pregnacare Conception Max which has 50mg Coenzyme Q10 daily. Good luck with ttc 💗

Congratulations! Thank you for your post. Anti Mullerian Hormone came back as 7.63 pmol/L. He hasn't had tests yet. Thinking of trying naturally for 6 months first before we seek fertility support. I've got myself overthinking it and overwhelmed. So sad. Need to work on my anxiety because everything could be okay. I've got myself stressed which I hate and my fiancé is unhappy that I'm getting overwhelmed at a time when we should be excited about our wedding. Don't even know how I've got myself in this place. Need to chill out before I put a strain on us!

Honestly, if you can afford it just get tested soonest.

This is the hardest thing to manage but stress will NOT help you. Focus on the things you can influence and enjoying the anticipation of the commitment you're making to each other and celebrating that.

Tests can be quiet and in the background. Don't wait 6 months to check.

What is your AMH? The average 42 year old has a 5% chance each cycle but miscarriage rates are higher because eggs are more likely to have genetic issues. If you were a patient of mine (I’m an acupuncturist) I would recommend starting the IVF process straight away, it takes a while and you can try naturally whilst you wait. You may need to go private because of your age depending on where you live.

Thanks for your reply. Anti Mullerian Hormone came back as 7.63 pmol/L. Which is in range for my age but the consultant at Hertility said it was considered low. Luteinising Hormone came back as 14.6 IU/L in focular phase which the report came back saying it was high. Googling it, it seems for some analysis this is still considered within normal range. I really need to chill out enjoy my relationship, enjoy the wedding, stop overthinking and letting anxiety take a place in my life. Will try 6 months naturally and go from there. I've really overthought it. I've got up out of bed now and I'm beginning to see how I've let worry sabotage my peace. Thanks for your reply.

I honestly wouldn’t wait 6 months - enjoy your wedding then go get tested x

I'm not on contraception. Haven't been for years. Been tracking my temperature and ovulation. Cycle is regular. We're not having sex yet because we're waiting to be married. We're both Christian and wanted to wait. Maybe that's caused me stress but it is how it is. Thank you.

Thank you for your reply. Anti Mullerian Hormone 7.63 pmol/L. Consultation said this was on the low side for fertility but in range for age but that it only takes one egg and to follow preconception health suggestions which we are. He's taking Vitabiotics Wellman Conception Max for 3 months so far and we don't drink or smoke. I think I've let wedding jitters creep in maybe. Thank you.

Thank you. How wonderful for your parents. Blessed with you. Thank you for sharing hope with me and for your kind words 💗

I'm not sure whether people sharing their stories are going to help OP. If it happens for you great, if not it's just going to make you more upset as you think 'why not me'? All you are achieving by thinking about it is getting stressed which won't help.
You said you're both Christians, pray and have faith. If it's meant to be for you it will happen, otherwise God has other plans for you.

Thank you. I think I've been irrational and wedding jitters have crept in. Terrible. As you say enjoy the excitement and celebrate it. I don't think house hunting has helped. Just to much at once. Need to chill out. I had tests with Hertility and they mentioned a discount for his testing if I went with them. Will get the wedding under our belts first before more tests. Don't want to put us under any more unwanted stress. My anxiety has caused enough problems this weekend. Had a melt down. Just couldn't plan our day together Sunday morning discussing what we had planned and a schedule. Just felt so overwhelmed with anxiety. Thanks again for your reply.