Coping in early pregnancy after a previous miscarriage

[Highlandttc]

Hey…

so I found out we were pregnant a few days ago after a 5day transfer and really wish I could be excited but I just feel like a bag of nerves. I actually tested a week earlier than I was supposed to as I just felt different and was happy to see a positive but it soon turned into dread. How am i going to cope over the next few weeks waiting for an early scan?! 😩
I’m also over analysing my tests - I’ll attach the ones I’ve done, they were getting darker but noticed there wasn’t much of a change between day 7(pm) and day 9(am) and it’s put my mind into a tizz! Reassurance needed!
**also my 7(pm) was tinged yellow due to the vitamins in my urine 🙈

@Highlandttc just checking in to see how you are? All much the same here, had a bit of a bleed last week which didn’t help my mental state but it all settled down again quickly. Holiday has proved a lovely distraction and passed the time much quicker than being at home would have done. Booked a scan for the 5th as planned, this Saturday, so just counting down to that now. Did you find out when you’ll be having your scan? How you feeling now? You’re past the 5 week point, that’s a nice milestone!

@OhmygoshREALLY hey! Stopped myself testing and just riding it out until my scan. Booked a private one this Sunday.. I’ll be 6wk+1 so hoping we see something! My NHS scan is another 2 weeks away but just can’t wait! Had a scare on Sunday night - had very light spotting when I wiped which sent me into a meltdown but thankfully yesterday it was just occasional light light brown when I wiped and it seemed to stop by the end of the day so will see how today goes! I’m on progesterone pessaries and injections so they could have been part of the issue, just trying to remain positive! Hopefully we get good news this weekend 🤍 x

Glad you’re still hanging in there! Well done on the no testing, has it made a positive difference do you think? I’d stopped but did a couple a few days post bleed and got a 3+ on digital and ridiculously dark line on normal test but haven’t done any more since.
Sorry about the spotting, am sure all is fine but it’s absolutely horrible isn’t it, your heart just sinks! I’m totally with you on not being able to wait for scans 😅 this weekend will be moment of truth for both of us then! Everything crossed for us both 🤞 positive thoughts, we’ll both be seeing our happy little babies this weekend!

@OhmygoshREALLY yeah I plan to do a digital at the end of this week and see if I get my 3+ (I’m really praying I do) but I know it doesn’t always mean what you want as I got it last time and still miscarried so it’s a difficult one! Hopefully we’ve got good news to celebrate this weekend x

Unfortunately not the update I was hoping for but I’m being taken in for an early scan tomorrow due to a very sudden heavy bleed along with a large clot (looked like a sac of blood) last night 💔 there is a chance it could be a hematoma as I’ve not had any pain and my last miscarriage I was in horrific pain but won’t know until tomorrow 😔
bleeding has pretty much gone today so not a clue what’s going on.. just got told bleeding is common with IVF pregnancy 😩

Aww sending you lots of love and I hope your scan goes ok. Hopefully with the bleeding stopping it could just be a normal pregnancy bleed. Hope you're ok ❤️

Oh no @Highlandttc I’m so sorry you’ve had all this extra stress piled on! If it helps, I had a massive bleed with one of mine (I thought I’d peed myself it was that much, pants and thighs were literally soaked with blood) and somehow he was fine 🤷‍♀️ so I’ll keep everything crossed it’s good news for you tomorrow. Keep me posted 💐

@Highlandttc sending you lots of love and I hope the news is positive tomorrow ❤️ xxx

Thank you for the love ❤️ will let you know the outcome x

I cannot believe I’m writing this but I’m pregnant - we seen the flicker of the heartbeat and the wee yolk sac too! Cannot stop crying! I really thought it was over!

@Highlandttc beautiful news! Congrats xxx

@Highlandttc omg brilliant news! So happy for you!!! ❤️

@Highlandttc that’s amazing!! Such good news, I’m so happy for you! Just goes to show that bleeding isn’t always bad news 😊

@OhmygoshREALLY i know, I just couldn’t believe how much there was.. it was such a shock! But thank goodness everything looked as it should today!! X

Just popping on with my scan update from yesterday - all fine, one happy baby with a strong heartbeat! She said she could see a second sac with the start of a yolk sac etc in it but no baby so she thought it was a twin that hadn’t progressed, which is likely the cause of all the bleeding and spotting I’ve had but she said they won’t do anything about it while there’s a healthy baby on board so it’ll sort itself one way or another.
Was a relief that there’s a healthy baby in there (and one is fine, I’m happy with one!) but tbh I’m still massively struggling with anxiety, I alternate between being fine when I’m not thinking about being pregnant and being an absolute headcase as soon as my brain doesn’t have anything to distract itself. I’m going to make a booking appointment with the midwife now the early scan shows it’s worth it though so I might mention it to her and see if she has any suggestions.

@OhmygoshREALLY aw that’s great!!! Yeah I’m with you on the anxiety - even after good news it’s still hard to believe everything is ok! I still have occasional spotting (very very light) but it just terrifies me!! I registered with my midwives yesterday so should have an appointment with them soon. My nausea is crazy - didn’t have it the last time so it’s taken me by surprise lol trying to find something I want to eat is an absolute nightmare 🙈 and omg my poor boobs ACHE!!! I just really hope all that is reassurance!
Praying for a healthy baby at the end! A long journey ahead! I think we’ll definitely book a private scan at 9 weeks! X

Hey @Highlandttc just checking in to see how you’re doing? All ok here but the anxiety is back with a vengeance, calmed down for a few days post scan but has ramped back up massively today. Think it’s cos my kids have gone to their dad’s so not enough distraction going on 🤷‍♀️ going to ring and book another scan tomorrow for ASAP. If it was up to me I’d have one every day but that might not be the healthiest approach!

Hi, can I join. Currently 11 weeks tomorrow, have my 12 week scan on Thursday should be 11+3 or 4, and I am Not coping!?

My last ever scan was at 16 weeks last pregnancy (6years ago!) to say there was no heartbeat. Baby passed at 13/14 weeks.

This time is completely different, natural pregnancy, MMC was a clomid pregnancy and I have already had an 8 week scan and seen a strong heartbeat but it isn't helping me, I'm preparing for the worst.

How can I help myself here?

@OhmygoshREALLY hey! I’m the same - still anxious! We’re going to book a private scan in a couple weeks when I should be 9 weeks.
I do still have occasional light pink/brown spotting which freaks me out but the EPU keep telling me it’s normal and only if I experience pain or it gets heavier would they be concerned!
Got my first midwives appointment next week so get registered etc. I’m still struggling to believe it’s actually happening so just trying to take it day by day!

@Kirstylvsya sorry you’re feeling this way 💐 as for how you help yourself - if you find out, let me know 😅 I think it’s just a case of slogging through the days til you feel a bit safer. I wish I could help more! But in the meantime we’re here to listen. For me scans help as it’s the not knowing that really messes with my head. Have you spoken to your midwife to see if you can have some extra scans if that’s something you think would help you?

@Highlandttc glad you’re hanging on in there! I’m still spotting pretty much every day too 🤷‍♀️ a bit tmi but I think mine might be from an over sensitive cervix as it’s definitely triggered by sex - if we skip a day it settles down but we have sex most days so it just kinda never stops! I worked myself up into a right state yesterday so have booked another scan for tomorrow 🙈 it’s only just over a week since the last one! I have my midwife booking appt on Wednesday and somehow it makes me feel more ok about it if I know the baby’s still ok when I go 🤷‍♀️ which I know is ridiculous but I’ve just accepted I’m a bit bonkers at the moment and trying to roll with it! Am going to talk to the mw about the anxiety too. DP is being amazing too bless him, he’s soaking up all my crazy with epic amounts of patience and kindness which helps as well.

@OhmygoshREALLY I haven't got a midwife yet, or any appointments in-fact apart from my private scan. Which doesn't help. Have both my booking appointment and 12 week scan this Thursday so that's not helping with the anxiety xx

@OhmygoshREALLY hope your scan went ok today 🤍 we were at a wedding all weekend and my goodness I’m exhausted!! Was hard being there and trying to pretend I was drinking, felt like every eye was on me 😂
we’ve been told no sex for a few weeks so just had to stick to it!

@Highlandttc ah bless you for remembering! It was totally fine, measuring exactly in line with my dates, still a lovely strong heartbeat. We even saw it having a little wiggle about which was cool. Still looks like a blob but now it’s got little arm and leg blobs too 😆 have promised DP I’ll try and stop being such a paranoid mess now 😅
Ooh wedding sounds fun but also tiring! I don’t know about you but I’m finding myself so knackered half the time I’m not sure I’d summon the required energy for a wedding! Am sure the not drinking was more subtle than you thought though and everyone was so busy getting drunk themselves that they didn’t even notice you were sober 🤣 & how come no sex??

@OhmygoshREALLY thats fantastic!! Hope we get to see something similar in a couple weeks when we go for ours!
not sure why the no sex - the EPU just told us to avoid for a few weeks x

Just an update - had a 9 week scan on Saturday and everything was just perfect! Little bean was wriggling around, so relieved!
I still get the occasional brown spotting/discharge but she found a small subchorionic hematoma which is likely the reason for that! Just so glad to see everything is still going ok! 12 week scan in a few weeks!