Pregnant previous SS involvement

[Geminiblue94]

Hi guys,
Recently found out I’m pregnant (unplanned) and have a 27 month old DD from a previous relationship. Sorry this might be a long one.

When DD was a few months old, I took her to A&E as she had a pinprick rash appear suddenly on her face and two red marks (around 1/4 cm) appeared on her lower arm. The pinprick rash was put down to viral petachie. They took a photo of the two marks on her arm which were extremely blurry and the lighting on the camera was bad. I had no clue what these photos were for and even the nurse commented how blurry the photos were but said they will do.
As these 2 marks were “medically unexplained” SS became involved. The marks never changed colour and one faded away completely in less than a day. The doctor could not be sure it wasn’t a rash or not so DD had to have a full skeletal survey and ct scan.

All results came back clear so case was closed and SS said they had no concerns. The same day I received a call off the social worker saying another doctor (who had never seen DD) had reviewed the photos which they had taken in A&E (the blurry ones) and believed the mark was a bruise. A section 47 was opened. A few days later, the social worker came over who said she had reviewed the photos with the head of paediatrics who had said these photos were far too blurry to say what the marks could be and that the hospital had not followed their safeguarding procedures (they should have taken proper photographs at the child protection medical). Because of this the case was closed and the social worker was very pleasant and apologetic. However, it didn’t get closed until months after because the hospital would not provide SS with the documentation needed.

I also had a brush with SS after splitting with my XH , the day after I left him he made malicious allegations up about me but thankfully SS saw straight through the lies. They visited once and that was it.

I’ve now started worrying about my midwife book in as I’m aware they will ask about any previous SS involvement. Will SS automatically get involved once I declare previous involvement? To add, the baby is not to my xH but a short term relationship which ended before I found out I was pregnant (was unplanned as was on the pill).

Despite the social workers always being pleasant, it was a horrendous experience to go through and would never want to go through it again.

Any advice appreciated :)

@Itsdecisiontimeisitnot no it hasn’t and I don’t. SS had no concerns last time and I have a great support network and financial stability to support 2 children. DD is a very happy and much loved child.

What were the extent of the bruising? As toddlers are always bruised from falling over / banging into things so 2 little bruises seem very strange for a doctor to pick up and SS to be involved with. How big were they?

I don't think in your case SS will be a bad thing as to them you pretty much have a clean record. They will probably check in on you etc but again this isn't a bad thing.

Just tell the truth, when dealing with any authority lying is an issue because if found out is shows you have the capability of lying. Than anything you say may be deemed untrustworthy.

Stay calm, don’t drink, don’t argue with exes, got to your appointments and enjoy your baby. There is a minimal chance of involvement but if you do all the right things, it shouldn’t be a problem.

I had a malicious referral once and it was awful. So when I was pregnant subsequently I just lied and said we had never had SS involvement because we shouldn’t have

I will add I’m not advising you do that but it’s what I did

I had a very similar experience with a pinprick rash and my daughter, it was bloody awful and blood tests eventually showed a clotting issue with her blood but SS were informed before the test results. It was so awful and it really affected me for a long time after. I can fully believe that story you paint from your first SS experience- I contacted PALS eventually and got an apology from the overzealous medical team, they’d made sure to refer to refer to SS but failed to refer to GOSH specialists blood team for the actual issue.

I can’t help with the other SS involvement but echo what others have said about being open and honest with everyone which can only help.

Honestly they get called out all the time 😂 I knew one worker and she would get annoyed having to deal with calls over silly things which they must follow up, which meant wasted time over the serious cases.

A school called up on suspected bruise... it was make up which the mum wiped off when the child got home 😂

SS involvement isn't always neglect or some big bad things, they also work with families with children who have disabilities as they can access support and help quicker and co ordinate all professionals.

@Itsdecisiontimeisitnot you are being very judgemental! Why are people on this site so mean. SS wouldn't have closed the case if they were not satisfied with her as a mother. I have seen many cases where they string the case out because they have concerns but not any solid proof. SS do not take these things lightly.

@Geminiblue94 I would guess the midwife will ask you about the involvement and probably contact them but that doesn't mean they will automatically open a case against you. I know it must be stressful but hopefully it will be an open and shut thing.

@Itsdecisiontimeisitnot the case was closed as the paediatricians who had actually physically examined DD did not believe the marks to be bruising (they clearly were not as one disappeared in half a day and the other never changed colour like a bruise would).
The reopening of the case was due to another doctor viewing the photos which were very blurred and with poor lighting. Once this had been clarified the case was closed.

Thanks everyone, I was always planning to be honest with the midwife. 😊

Be honest it will show up on your record and look bad when you don't disclose!
Your GP , midwife and health visitor can all see on record when a previous children service involvement has taken place. lying looks very very bad You just state the facts honestly. The case was close, if no concerns nothing will happen.

@buzzybea25 thanks yes I’m aware they’ll be able to see on the records anyways so was always going to disclose it 😊 was just wondering what to expect afterwards.

@CalmDownBoris72 I’m sorry to hear, I can imagine how horrible it must have been for you all but glad you got an apology in the end. It’s an awful experience to go through.

My sister had a lot of ss involvement with her first child from first midwife appointment until baby was about a year old. The case was closed then and ss did not get involved when she got pregnant with her second (different father but she also became a single parent during the pregnancy). They did again when kids where a bit older but that was due to new concerns. I doubt they will get involved in your case based on what you have said, I think once a case is closed unless new concerns arise they don't get involved.

@K37529 thanks, that’s a reassurance to hear 😊

@Geminiblue94 thanks, congratulations and hope everything goes really well with the new baby.

People on here are being incredibly judgmental.

I have ended up with SS involvement twice. Once reported by DD nursery for a bruise that was easily explained and the nursery actually ended up getting in trouble as they had not being following policies. Case was closed and we had a lot of apologies from the nursery. The second was because I was assaulted in my home while DD was in bed so SS made contact just to check he was not in any contact with me or DD (he was in prison at this point plus had a restraining order on him) then case immediately closed.

I have had another DC since then and I’m currently pregnant with my third. The only questions I was asked was if I have ever been in the care system and if I currently have any open cases with SS. I have never had SS contact me about either pregnancy or at any point since DC2 was born.

I would say just be honest. If there is anything it would flag up anyway but if all cases are closed then you don’t have anything to worry about.

@Itsdecisiontimeisitnot my point was that social services will likely only get involved if there are new concerns. They have already ruled out reasons to be involved with OP, and a new pregnancy is unlikely to effect that.