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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

yep it is another of those shit I'm pregnant threads... sorry

51 replies

pleasepleaseplease · 20/02/2008 12:07

I have namechanged temporarily as I am seeking advise on breaking the news to dh that the accidental 3rd preganancy is here [quake]

I am on the pill and didn't have the normal withdrawl bleed so I took the test an hour ago to check did NOT think it would be so very definately positive - so shit shit shit shit etc.

We have a 3.5yo and a nearly 2yo so were just about coming out of the nappies and into pre-school, school and all that. Really not planninhg this oh bugger.

I will be ok what will be will be and it is early stages yet (though no idea exactly how far along I am??) but dh is not good with the unexpected iykwim - he is likely too freak how can i break it to him gently???

bugger bugger bugger etc. ad infinitum...

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

bratnav · 20/02/2008 12:10

poor you, I am sure as long as you don't beat around the bush it will all be fine. Yes it's going to be a shock for him, as it was for you, but he's an adult and I'm sure he will cope.

Have you given him any idea this might be a possibility?

belgo · 20/02/2008 12:10

oh dear. Absolutely not your fault, and make sure your dh realises that!

Tell your dh as soon as possible, and there is no gentle way in my experience (but don't tell him the way I told my dh - waking him up at midnight one night...that's really not the way to do it!)

Lulumama · 20/02/2008 12:12

if you have had a contraceptive failure, he can hardly be cross with you..... if you did not have your week off bleed, then you could be around 5 -6 weeks? i think you should stop taking the pill now.... and make a GP appointment....

you can then discuss things together...

Original poster

pleasepleaseplease · 20/02/2008 12:15

thank you belgo and bratnav

I am still a bit in shock i think and my typing has gone to shit.

Anyway I think I will have to sit him down with a nice dinnetr and a cup of tea and make very clear how shoked I am I had convinced myself it would be neg and had not told him i was going to do a test as i 'knew' it would be negative.

God I am meant to be flying to effing Gran canARIA ON MON on hol with the in-laws buggeruckshit

sorry about the swearing i am a well brought girl really

My mum is leaving the area and moving 300m away on sat as well so i can't tell her

OP posts:

Lulumama · 20/02/2008 12:16

you can still go on holiday !

belgo · 20/02/2008 12:17

I think swearing is excused in the circumstances

I hope it works out for you

posieflump · 20/02/2008 12:17

could you just tell him you think you might be, get him to bring a test home and find out together?

Original poster

pleasepleaseplease · 20/02/2008 12:17

sorry I am making no sense

I am still on the break so I won't start taking the pill again.

OP posts:

Original poster

pleasepleaseplease · 20/02/2008 12:20

I can't phone dh if i do i will tell him - it is going to be really difficult seeing mum tommmorrow and not tell her.

Have made a doc's appt for fri to try to ork out how far along i am.

still won't need to get rid of the double buggy afterall and have boy and girl baby clothes.... cripes

OP posts:

Lulumama · 20/02/2008 12:21

erm, congratulations !

twill be ok. promise

Original poster

pleasepleaseplease · 20/02/2008 12:23

oh god what if its twins they run in my family - i am scared - but i will be ok - i think

OP posts:

belgo · 20/02/2008 12:24

tell your mum if you want to, that's what mums are there for

Fillyjonk · 20/02/2008 12:26

it will be ok,

I was very worried about telling dp. ultimately it was fine

best of luck

Original poster

pleasepleaseplease · 20/02/2008 12:27

thank you lulu

and thank you everyone for answering - i am just having my private freak out and i am shaking like a leaf but i have to get my head sorted.

OP posts:

NatalieJane · 20/02/2008 12:29

Can't help smiling at this.

It sounds like you have had a shcok, and I am sure it will be a shock for DH aswell, could you text him now (so you don't have to talk to him) tell him you haven't had the withdrawel bleed and you are going to nip into town to get a HPT, then at least he has had some prior warning?

Am I allowed to say congratulations?

Original poster

pleasepleaseplease · 20/02/2008 12:40

I wasn't planning to have a third - and certainly not so soon but i will adjust - it is still very early anyway

Dh has been very adamant that he wants to stop at two. But when i first met him it was never then maybe one then ok 2 so ... he is not someone who never changes his mind.

I just want to tell him now but don't want to phone him at work really - would that be mean - i should wait shouldn't i..?

oh god i was looking forward to cocktails at the beach next week bollocks...

OP posts:

belgo · 20/02/2008 12:45

no, I wouldn't phone him at work, he won't be able to react int eh way he needs to react because he's at work.

Tell him when he gets home, in the privacy of your own home.

NatalieJane · 20/02/2008 12:47

If you think it will initially go down badly, maybe not the best idea to tell him at work. Having said that, if you think him being able to have some space at work before coming home would help him mull it over, then maybe it is a good idea?

You can have fruit cocktails Pretend they are laced with alocohol

NatalieJane · 20/02/2008 12:48

Alcohol even, first time I've ever typo'ed that word!

Original poster

pleasepleaseplease · 20/02/2008 12:58

ironically I have namechanged till dh knows out of respect to him but if i use my usual name you will all go who??? anyway

I won't tell dh - not till he gets home - just better not be bloody late.

OP posts:

LoveMyGirls · 20/02/2008 13:06

I think you should txt him and tell him you need him home early because you wanxt a nice \evening with him, perhaps wear something nice and cook something nice, get him some beer in so its all relaxed, wait until after dinner than tell him calmly once he has had time to unwind from his busy day etc hopefully then he will take the news better and be positive about the new baby.

Funny how women don't get the luxery of having it broken softly when they take the test, maybe tests should come witha voice activated thingy that says "Well by the looks of it it looks like you may very well be pregnant now sit down and have a cup of tea dear"

MrsTittleMouse · 20/02/2008 13:08

DH and I always thought that you should be able to get "I want to be pregnant" and "I don't want to be pregnant" tests. So that you could have a chip inside that plays the Hallelujah chorus if you've been TTC for ages and you get a BFP. Or one that, indeed, tells you to have a nice cup of tea and everything will be OK.

NatalieJane · 20/02/2008 13:13

LOL MrsTittle, you could have a market there

Carey87 · 20/02/2008 13:33

ppp, everything will be fine!!! He might really surprise you and be over the moon and might secretely have wanted another one so soon! You never know!

Cxx

mumblesmummy · 20/02/2008 20:13

Hiya, I might be a little late, but my pan would be to say 'I havn't come on this month which is so strange as I've taken my pill perfectly. I know it'll be negative, but do you think we should do a test?' Then when he says yes and you do one and it's positive be all 'Oh My God I never thought that would be positive. I'm so glad you're here to support me... etc etc'.

Good luck!!

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