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Original poster

Heartbroken after Infertility clinic recommndations

29 replies

Tryingagain01 · 03/11/2022 08:44

Hi.

We started ttc around March. In May I became pregnant, but it was a blighted ovum so I had medication to miscarry around 8 weeks. In the beginning of October I had a chemical and on 24 October I had again positive pregnancy tests.

The hcg and progesterone are low and slowly rising. What I'm thinking is the medication from the first pregnancy affected the levels of progesteron and that's why I had problems now.

However, the GP was trying to tell be to go to an infertility clinic. And to be honest, I feel she did nothing to explore what the problem could be.

I feel heart broken and hopeless...

Could you please tell me what you think?

OP posts:
RambamThankyouMam · 03/11/2022 08:47

A GP won't be as qualified to investigate any issues as the fertility clinic will be. If I were you I would accept the referral.

Snugglemonkey · 03/11/2022 08:49

So are you currently pregnant? They don't investigate losses until at least 3 here. It is a difficult position to be in.

Is she referring you to an NHS fertility clinic? That would be exploring the problem surely as they will do the appropriate testing.

Your post is a bit unclear, so I might not be understanding you well sorry.

FoxtrotSkarloey · 03/11/2022 08:51

Surely a referral is a good thing because it will be investigated by experts?

Please don't feel hopeless. I'm sorry for your losses.

PritiPatelsMaker · 03/11/2022 08:53

Was it definitely a blighted ovum. They did rule out you having a partial molar didn't they?

Hrf1503 · 03/11/2022 08:54

I commented on one of your previous posts and I’m so sorry you still haven’t got a definitive answer. I can’t answer on the question of whether it’s the medication from your first pregnancy but wanted to recommend Tommy’s - they have a helpline you can call which is run by midwives (they never answer from experience but leave your name and number they do call you back) they might be able to give you better advice. Also speak to your EPU, if you’ve had previous miscarriages and your progesterone is low they might start you on additional progesterone. My GP has been beyond useless and the EPU are much better placed to advise/treat you. And finally I agree with PP on the referral to fertility clinic, if you don’t end up needing it great but I know the wait for these things can be so long so worth it to get in waiting list. All the best.

DrFoxtrot · 03/11/2022 08:56

I'm sorry you're having a heartbreaking time Sad. The referral is to explore what the problem might be so I'm confused about your thinking there. Although like PP said, I might be misunderstanding.

BertieBotts · 03/11/2022 08:57

Go for the referral as it takes ages. If you get pregnant in the meantime, you can just cancel the appointment. The GP can't suggest anything because they probably aren't an expert in fertility/pregnancy/miscarriage. Referring is the right thing to do. I guess this counts as a third loss assuming that the current pregnancy is non viable.

I don't think medication taken in May would affect a pregnancy in October.

Original poster
Tryingagain01 · 03/11/2022 09:01

She just brought it up, no details, as she said I first need to have my HCG back to normal. But when I heard this notion - infertility, all my body and mind just shutdown...

Went to different GPs, they all say different stuff and some of them don't seem to care at all...

Thank you all for the replies!

OP posts:
Original poster
Tryingagain01 · 03/11/2022 09:02

@BertieBotts medication was taken in July. And the effect is it inhibits progesteron and my levels are low.

Thanks.

OP posts:
BertieBotts · 03/11/2022 09:07

Infertility is an often misunderstood term, it doesn't mean that somebody can't have a baby, it just means that you are having a harder time conceiving than normal. It's useful to have the investigation so that they can see if anything can be done to increase those chances.

I'm sorry you're struggling; it can be a hugely emotional time and sometimes thinking about it can seem paralysing.

I don't think medication in July would cause an issue 3 months later but I am not a fertility expert. I know a common treatment is to take progesterone, so that may be something recommended to you.

PritiPatelsMaker · 03/11/2022 09:17

She just brought it up, no details, as she said I first need to have my HCG back to normal. But when I heard this notion - infertility, all my body and mind just shutdown...

Went to different GPs, they all say different stuff and some of them don't seem to care at all...

It sounds as though you are extremely anxious about all of this, and I can understand as you've been through a lot.

I think, though you need to give yourself a break from all of this.

If the GP has referred you to an NHS fertility clinic accept the offer.

Then do things that you would suggest to a friend if they'd had a hard time recently like nights out with friends, a weekend away. Maybe start yoga or running but don't try for a baby for a few weeks at least. I wouldn't use contraception but I would definitely give yourself time to heal.

CristinaNov182 · 03/11/2022 10:30

I don’t know when they’re called infertility clinics.

they should be called fertility specialists, which they are. Which would make you positive and hopeful going in.

your gp is honest and not just bs-ing you or giving some tests she might not know how to interpret properly or in context. A lot of GPs hold on a lot on giving these referrals, so good you got one relatively quickly.

I would go back for the referral, and take a conception vitamin in the meantime. My DH also took the ones for men, lots of issues manifested in women are actually caused by some issue with the sperm, everything could help, you never know.

FanTaill · 03/11/2022 10:37

However, the GP was trying to tell be to go to an infertility clinic. And to be honest, I feel she did nothing to explore what the problem could be.
They're not called infertility clinics, they’re called fertility clinics. And they’re the people who will do all the exploring, not the GP.

This is a positive step forward. And there are lots of other positive things you can be doing in the meantime.

HoppingPavlova · 03/11/2022 10:41

You should feel good that your GP was willing to refer you quickly at this point. Many people struggle to get GPs to refer until significantly down the track, whereas yours is prepared to do this upfront, what a bonus! Not sure what you want your GP to do as these investigations are not within their remit at all?

steppemum · 03/11/2022 10:46

I had several miscarriages and was referred to a clinic. I met with the consultant and in 20 minutes he was so knowledgable and so kind and so reassuring, it was a really positive experience.

Hope you get some answers soon. x x

(PS I now have 3 kids)

Original poster
Tryingagain01 · 03/11/2022 11:52

I'm not from the UK and probably that's why I see things different. Here the clinic is actually called "infertility clinic" and you get there mostly if they asume you have major problems. I also saw I made a mistake, it was not the GP, but a gynecologist. I am indeed very anxious and overwhelmed as I feel people just try to send the responsibility to someone else and don't care enough to investigate...

Thanks all

OP posts:
Halfwreckedbykids · 03/11/2022 11:58

Ah you ve had it v tough.

I suppose age and experiences have a part to play.

I would accept a referral because it will quicken the process.

My situation is I had secondary infertility. Tried clomid no luck. It was as a result of an infection after dd.

Tried iui once but then went to ivf I was 38 and in a rush because peri menopause was looming.

Ivf is a hard thing to accept but the one thing I ll say is that it is a managed cycle, all pressure if off you and the clinic manage it.

I had my twins by ivf and the ivf process, while hard was also easy because i felt that the doctors had it in hand.

steppemum · 03/11/2022 12:37

I feel people just try to send the responsibility to someone else and don't care enough to investigate...

In reality it is exactly the other way round.
A good doctor knows the limit of their ability to help, and they quickly refer on to someone who has a specialised interest and can get to the bottom of the problem better.

PritiPatelsMaker · 03/11/2022 12:42

In reality it is exactly the other way round. A good doctor knows the limit of their ability to help, and they quickly refer on to someone who has a specialised interest and can get to the bottom of the problem better.

And probably earlier Wink

Betsyboo87 · 03/11/2022 13:21

I’m also abroad and my gynaecologist was quite similar. She is fab with routine things, smears, contraception and she looked after me really well through my pregnancy. However she just doesn’t have the specialism to deal with fertility problems so I went to a clinic once we’d been trying for a while. I do understand how you feel, I put off going for a long time because I felt like it meant she was saying there was a problem. Please don’t see this as a negative, it’s a step forward in looking into whether you have any problems. They’ll start by just doing the basic tests and go from there.

Original poster
Tryingagain01 · 03/11/2022 14:50

Thanks again. I'm still waiting for some results and will go in a couple of weeks to a private consultation to another gynecologist with good reviews.

OP posts:
Northtosouth · 03/11/2022 15:52

I saw a gynaecologist last year but he wasn’t an expert in fertility which he openly told me. I was treated by him for my endometriosis which was affecting my fertility and treated separately by an IVF consultant, they’re quite different areas with different skill sets.
From what you’ve said it doesn’t sound like the gynaecologist isn’t trying to help but more that they can’t as it’s out of their remit?
I would go to the fertility clinic as recommended by the gynaecologist if I were you and at least have an initial consultation.

babyjellyfish · 03/11/2022 16:01

Sorry for your losses, OP.

Which country are you in?

Rosegold3112 · 03/11/2022 18:17

I'm no expert on this but if I were you I would try to take this as positively as possible. Firstly, I think the phrase infertility clinic is just harsh and doesn't mean you are infertile! But language is very powerful so I can totally understand your disappointment and shock at hearing it.
Secondly, I'm not entirely sure what your situation now is and what the outcome of your positive pregnancy tests around the 24th were? But assuming you're not currently pregnant now and these tests followed a chemical (and could potentially have been a second chemical), I originally believed my pregnancy to be a chemical and found a wonderful woman on youtube who shared her experience. She explained she had many chemicals and its procedure in the UK on the NHS to only investigate recurring miscarriages after 3 losses (which I think there's a lot of uproar about), and so after 3 chemicals she was referred for further tests and it turned out she had low progesterone. This was causing all her chemicals and she was given the appropriate treatment, and thanks to this her next pregnancy progressed to full term. It was a rather bittersweet story, as its likely if they'd investigated sooner that her chemicals could have been prevented. So although this may not be of comfort to you, it seems like your gp is just trying to help to investigate and see if there is something that can be done in future to prevent another loss. Sending you love and I hope you get the answers you need and I'm so sorry for your losses x

Original poster
Tryingagain01 · 03/11/2022 18:30

I know I got a bit carried away. Some crazy months I had...

Thank you for the objective and positive perspective.

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